When Alzheimer’s Residents “Borrow”

Families often become frustrated when they find items missing from their family member’s room at a nursing home.  Clothing, pictures, cards, shoes, jewelry disappear and they often blame the staff or another resident.

Even though items disappear, it may not occur consciously.  The person with Alzheimer’s truly thinks it’s their property, even though these are  possessions belonging in someone else’s room.

“Look at the lovely birthday cards I received,” Mother commented. 

“It’s not your birthday, Mother,” I answered.

Mother insisted it was and that the cards were from various friends and relatives.  However, these cards were addressed to someone else at the nursing home and signed from their friends and relatives.  My mom, who would never think of taking something that wasn’t hers, had gone into other rooms and collected these cards, truly thinking they had been given to her.

I found shoes and slippers that weren’t hers in her closet or under her bed.  The same was true of a hair brush, a book, and similar items. 

When I could determine whose they were, I’d return them or take them to the nurse’s station.  This was a common occurence for many residents, they mentioned.

So when Mother was no longer mobile or took no interest in other’s possessions, I couldn’t complain when residents from other rooms “borrowed” her items.  I learned, with Alzheimer’s residents, you didn’t keep items of value or sentimental  note in their rooms.  There still remained much I could leave with Mother that satisfied her needs and wasn’t of interest to borrowers.