When Fear Controls Forgiveness
February 12, 2008 by angelique
Filed under Women's Health
I remember one night (day?) during my ED recovery period realizing that I was allowing the fear of the future to get in the way of my present.
It was an epiphany.
I suddenly understood that in order to get past my anorexia, I had to get past my deepest fear: The Unknown. And that was a dark, dark area.
Ironically, I’m now joyfully experiencing that “fear” – daily life without an ED consuming each waking moment. I’ve forgiven myself for abusing my body and callously messing with my metabolism. But if I hadn’t worked through my fears, pushed beyond my perceived barriers, destroyed walls I had built…
Well, I don’t think I’d be blogging today.
So I’m wondering… what fears are keeping you from living your life to its fullest?
Absolutely fear of being alone, never knowing love (romantic love). I’ve been having the same sort of epiphany myself this week, and learning to just let it go. The fear of not knowing if that reality will come to pass still resides in me, of course, and may still flare up on some days, but learning to not let it control my daily life is so freeing.