Who’s Watching?

About a year ago,  Alex broke our oven door. He did this by standing on it in order to do something (probably turn on the light on the range hood). I heard a curious squeaky unhappy hinge kind of sound and went into the kitchen. I won’t say “ran” — because I was sitting at the computer, which is about four feet away. We live in Manhattan, after all.

photo courtesy of LePetitPoulailler (flickr.com)

The oven door was open and hanging at a very unusual angle. I looked at Alex, I screamed at Alex, I questioned him intensively but he never could or would tell me what happened. All I know is, one minute we had an oven door that would close and the next minute we didn’t.

The appliance repair people said they’d come in a week. Then parts would have to be ordered. So we were looking at a few weeks without an oven. I complained to a friend of mine in an email, and he asked, “Who was watching Alex?” “Uh… I guess I was.” “Good job!” he fired back. Angry emails ensued, and he never apologized for what I saw as an insensitive remark or expressed any sympathy for having a son who, at age 10, still had to be watched most of the time like a 2-year-old.

We have since reconciled, but I was pretty hurt. All kids do stupid things, I know. And all parents have moments when they wish they could go back in time just 10 minutes (or even 10 seconds). But our kids do some unusually unpredictable things. Abandon their sandals and stroll out of the playground. Stand on an oven door. Run screeching down the hall of our apartment building.

“It’s like living with an alien sometimes,” said Jeff. It’s one thing to know your friend’s kid has some unusual traits, it’s another to know how very difficult life is day to day.