Comments on: Why I Don’t Hold Charlie’s Hand All the Time Now (But Still Sometimes) http://www.blisstree.com/articles/why-i-dont-hold-charlies-hand-all-the-time-now-but-still-sometimes/ Family, Health, Home and Lifestyles Tue, 22 Dec 2009 17:01:07 -0500 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.8.4 hourly 1 By: Regan http://www.blisstree.com/articles/why-i-dont-hold-charlies-hand-all-the-time-now-but-still-sometimes/comment-page-1/#comment-565291 Regan Mon, 13 Apr 2009 13:29:41 +0000 http://www.autismvox.com/why-i-dont-hold-charlies-hand-all-the-time-now-but-still-sometimes/#comment-565291 The conclusion of the story on Jeremy Fraser, Jeremy died from his cancer Monday, March 30, 2009. I hope he was able to enjoy his last days. The conclusion of the story on Jeremy Fraser,
Jeremy died from his cancer Monday, March 30, 2009.

I hope he was able to enjoy his last days.

]]> By: A Cold Walk, Hands Free (For the Most Part) http://www.blisstree.com/articles/why-i-dont-hold-charlies-hand-all-the-time-now-but-still-sometimes/comment-page-1/#comment-557585 A Cold Walk, Hands Free (For the Most Part) Mon, 08 Dec 2008 07:34:29 +0000 http://www.autismvox.com/why-i-dont-hold-charlies-hand-all-the-time-now-but-still-sometimes/#comment-557585 [...] couple of years ago, I stopped holding Charlie’s hand on our regular walks around the neighborhood. He was starting to let go more and more, to pull away [...] [...] couple of years ago, I stopped holding Charlie’s hand on our regular walks around the neighborhood. He was starting to let go more and more, to pull away [...]

]]> By: Teaching Strategy #18: Walking Side By Side http://www.blisstree.com/articles/why-i-dont-hold-charlies-hand-all-the-time-now-but-still-sometimes/comment-page-1/#comment-560883 Teaching Strategy #18: Walking Side By Side Mon, 14 Jul 2008 05:00:50 +0000 http://www.autismvox.com/why-i-dont-hold-charlies-hand-all-the-time-now-but-still-sometimes/#comment-560883 [...] around New York City and elsewhere, have taught Charlie to more or less stay with us, even without holding hands. I most certainly hold Charlie’s hand (and sometimes his shirt or jacket) when we’re [...] [...] around New York City and elsewhere, have taught Charlie to more or less stay with us, even without holding hands. I most certainly hold Charlie’s hand (and sometimes his shirt or jacket) when we’re [...]

]]> By: Leanne http://www.blisstree.com/articles/why-i-dont-hold-charlies-hand-all-the-time-now-but-still-sometimes/comment-page-1/#comment-556067 Leanne Fri, 04 Jul 2008 21:27:04 +0000 http://www.autismvox.com/why-i-dont-hold-charlies-hand-all-the-time-now-but-still-sometimes/#comment-556067 Patrick and I held hands for the pure joy of it today. Sometimes we HAVE to do it because of safety...but just today we went to the store and Patrick stayed with me while I kept up a constant verbal stream of "that's great Grade 1 walking, good job staying by my side, look at how carefully you're walking and watching for cars....". It was a fabulous moment. Then, when we were walking later, he came up beside me and slipped his little hand into mine. Oh the joy of it all. I don't know what to say about the mom who didn't get her son the treatment he needed. It makes me very sad. Patrick and I held hands for the pure joy of it today. Sometimes we HAVE to do it because of safety…but just today we went to the store and Patrick stayed with me while I kept up a constant verbal stream of “that’s great Grade 1 walking, good job staying by my side, look at how carefully you’re walking and watching for cars….”. It was a fabulous moment. Then, when we were walking later, he came up beside me and slipped his little hand into mine. Oh the joy of it all.

I don’t know what to say about the mom who didn’t get her son the treatment he needed. It makes me very sad.

]]> By: Kristina Chew, PhD http://www.blisstree.com/articles/why-i-dont-hold-charlies-hand-all-the-time-now-but-still-sometimes/comment-page-1/#comment-559622 Kristina Chew, PhD Fri, 04 Jul 2008 19:44:02 +0000 http://www.autismvox.com/why-i-dont-hold-charlies-hand-all-the-time-now-but-still-sometimes/#comment-559622 From the <a href="http://www.telegram.com/article/20080704/APN/807040771">Worcester Telegram</a> about Jeremy Fraser: <blockquote>A woman accused of withholding cancer treatment from her eight-year-old son says the boy is her world. Kristen LaBrie of Beverly told The Boston Globe that her attorney told her not to comment on charges that she interrupted treatment for her son, Jeremy Fraser. LaBrie told the Globe she never saw the many needs of her son, who is also autistic, as a burden, but saw caring for him as her entire life. Authorities say the boy's prognosis was good until his mother deprived him of medication. Now he is not expected to survive. He's now living with his father in Saugus. LaBrie said she would have preferred if her son was placed in medical foster home, where he would be getting treatment. His father, Eric Fraser, said he's stopped chemotherapy so his son can enjoy his last days, instead of getting sick from the medicine. </blockquote> From the Worcester Telegram about Jeremy Fraser:

A woman accused of withholding cancer treatment from her eight-year-old son says the boy is her world.

Kristen LaBrie of Beverly told The Boston Globe that her attorney told her not to comment on charges that she interrupted treatment for her son, Jeremy Fraser.

LaBrie told the Globe she never saw the many needs of her son, who is also autistic, as a burden, but saw caring for him as her entire life.

Authorities say the boy’s prognosis was good until his mother deprived him of medication. Now he is not expected to survive.

He’s now living with his father in Saugus.

LaBrie said she would have preferred if her son was placed in medical foster home, where he would be getting treatment.

His father, Eric Fraser, said he’s stopped chemotherapy so his son can enjoy his last days, instead of getting sick from the medicine.

]]> By: Regan http://www.blisstree.com/articles/why-i-dont-hold-charlies-hand-all-the-time-now-but-still-sometimes/comment-page-1/#comment-556042 Regan Fri, 04 Jul 2008 19:37:04 +0000 http://www.autismvox.com/why-i-dont-hold-charlies-hand-all-the-time-now-but-still-sometimes/#comment-556042 Thinking about outgrowing holding hands. I wonder when as a society we decided that was "sissy", something more significant than simple friendliness, or not done. I like to read 19th and early 20th century literature, and watch old movies and even same-sex high schoolers, usually girls, are walking hand in hand, and in some books of the 19th century, guys have arms over shoulders and around waists as part of being friends. Maybe society needs to loosen up a little bit :-). Thinking about outgrowing holding hands.

I wonder when as a society we decided that was “sissy”, something more significant than simple friendliness, or not done. I like to read 19th and early 20th century literature, and watch old movies and even same-sex high schoolers, usually girls, are walking hand in hand, and in some books of the 19th century, guys have arms over shoulders and around waists as part of being friends.

Maybe society needs to loosen up a little bit :-) .

]]> By: Rebecca http://www.blisstree.com/articles/why-i-dont-hold-charlies-hand-all-the-time-now-but-still-sometimes/comment-page-1/#comment-552196 Rebecca Thu, 03 Jul 2008 22:39:33 +0000 http://www.autismvox.com/why-i-dont-hold-charlies-hand-all-the-time-now-but-still-sometimes/#comment-552196 I can't believe that I missed that article yesterday. Madison does have a way of making everything "extreme". I do think the article showed more of one side than the other, although Pam and her son calvin live three houses away from us in McFarland and I can say she does have a lot on her plate. It makes me thankful for what my boys can do. Madison love extreme left wing causes,esp the Cap Times, so no supprise it makes autism sound horrible. If they had interviewed me, i could have told them a story about love, joy and life with autism. Your family doesn't change with the diagnosis. Yes, its there, but it is one piece of a very large and delicious pie. I look foreward to life with my sons every day and so do many families in the Dane county area and around the world. I can’t believe that I missed that article yesterday. Madison does have a way of making everything “extreme”. I do think the article showed more of one side than the other, although Pam and her son calvin live three houses away from us in McFarland and I can say she does have a lot on her plate. It makes me thankful for what my boys can do. Madison love extreme left wing causes,esp the Cap Times, so no supprise it makes autism sound horrible. If they had interviewed me, i could have told them a story about love, joy and life with autism. Your family doesn’t change with the diagnosis. Yes, its there, but it is one piece of a very large and delicious pie. I look foreward to life with my sons every day and so do many families in the Dane county area and around the world.

]]> By: hammie http://www.blisstree.com/articles/why-i-dont-hold-charlies-hand-all-the-time-now-but-still-sometimes/comment-page-1/#comment-554149 hammie Thu, 03 Jul 2008 21:47:38 +0000 http://www.autismvox.com/why-i-dont-hold-charlies-hand-all-the-time-now-but-still-sometimes/#comment-554149 I still have to hold hands in parking lots. The lack of a sense of danger in my Boo, and the lack of a need to learn to drive before getting in a car in Ireland combines to make this a neccessity. But we need to do another course of tag teach as mummy's arm becomes a swing toy on the way to get anywhere. As for physical contact. He is 10 1/2 and almost as tall as me. I still hug and kiss and hold him in public. A friend of mine was told to stop hugging her 12 year old daughter by a psychologist, who said it wasnt age appropriate. I disagreed. Ireland just isnt a tactile or demonstrative country generally. They barely shake hands! I notice when I go to the latin countries like Spain or Southern Italy that you see even older children getting hugged or holding hands with parents as they passagio in the evenings. But if Boo ever "out grows" me I know I will still have one thing each day. Is there anything sweeter than rubbing a towel into your son's newly washed and soaking hair? xx I still have to hold hands in parking lots. The lack of a sense of danger in my Boo, and the lack of a need to learn to drive before getting in a car in Ireland combines to make this a neccessity.
But we need to do another course of tag teach as mummy’s arm becomes a swing toy on the way to get anywhere.
As for physical contact. He is 10 1/2 and almost as tall as me. I still hug and kiss and hold him in public. A friend of mine was told to stop hugging her 12 year old daughter by a psychologist, who said it wasnt age appropriate. I disagreed. Ireland just isnt a tactile or demonstrative country generally. They barely shake hands!
I notice when I go to the latin countries like Spain or Southern Italy that you see even older children getting hugged or holding hands with parents as they passagio in the evenings.

But if Boo ever “out grows” me I know I will still have one thing each day. Is there anything sweeter than rubbing a towel into your son’s newly washed and soaking hair?

xx

]]> By: Kristina Chew, PhD http://www.blisstree.com/articles/why-i-dont-hold-charlies-hand-all-the-time-now-but-still-sometimes/comment-page-1/#comment-558419 Kristina Chew, PhD Thu, 03 Jul 2008 20:56:16 +0000 http://www.autismvox.com/why-i-dont-hold-charlies-hand-all-the-time-now-but-still-sometimes/#comment-558419 reports of patterns of domestic abuse---Jeremy found wandering by a gas station at the age of 7----alcohol perhaps-----seems like there was way too much in this case: Was DSS looking into this enough? <blockquote>Divorce papers filed in the Salem Probate and Family Court in 2003 include an allegation by LaBrie that her husband, Eric Fraser, was "cruel and abusive" during their marriage. She was granted a restraining order by a Lynn District Court judge in 2000, according to her divorce application. In an undated letter in the divorce file, Eric Fraser appealed to a judge for help, saying that he feared for his son's well-being because of LaBrie's allegedly abusive relationship with a new boyfriend. The letter also described a pattern of alleged harassment by LaBrie, including frequent calls and text messages to members of Fraser's family and efforts by LaBrie to prevent Fraser from seeing his son in the hospital. LaBrie and Fraser shared legal custody of the boy, but he remained in the physical custody of his mother until his hospitalization in March. Fraser said in an interview Monday that he was unable to "co-parent" effectively with LaBrie because of the tension between the two and cut off contact with her and his son for several months last year. Then his son's health declined, he said, and hospital officials said they could not allow Jeremy to go home with LaBrie. On April 7, LaBrie agreed to give sole legal and physical custody of the boy to Fraser and not to seek visitation, according to court documents. LaBrie's lawyer, James, would not comment outside court Monday and hung up when contacted by a Salem News reporter yesterday. He did not return two subsequent calls.</blockquote> reports of patterns of domestic abuse—Jeremy found wandering by a gas station at the age of 7—-alcohol perhaps—–seems like there was way too much in this case: Was DSS looking into this enough?

Divorce papers filed in the Salem Probate and Family Court in 2003 include an allegation by LaBrie that her husband, Eric Fraser, was “cruel and abusive” during their marriage. She was granted a restraining order by a Lynn District Court judge in 2000, according to her divorce application.

In an undated letter in the divorce file, Eric Fraser appealed to a judge for help, saying that he feared for his son’s well-being because of LaBrie’s allegedly abusive relationship with a new boyfriend.

The letter also described a pattern of alleged harassment by LaBrie, including frequent calls and text messages to members of Fraser’s family and efforts by LaBrie to prevent Fraser from seeing his son in the hospital.

LaBrie and Fraser shared legal custody of the boy, but he remained in the physical custody of his mother until his hospitalization in March. Fraser said in an interview Monday that he was unable to “co-parent” effectively with LaBrie because of the tension between the two and cut off contact with her and his son for several months last year. Then his son’s health declined, he said, and hospital officials said they could not allow Jeremy to go home with LaBrie.

On April 7, LaBrie agreed to give sole legal and physical custody of the boy to Fraser and not to seek visitation, according to court documents.

LaBrie’s lawyer, James, would not comment outside court Monday and hung up when contacted by a Salem News reporter yesterday. He did not return two subsequent calls.

]]> By: Regan http://www.blisstree.com/articles/why-i-dont-hold-charlies-hand-all-the-time-now-but-still-sometimes/comment-page-1/#comment-542412 Regan Thu, 03 Jul 2008 20:52:06 +0000 http://www.autismvox.com/why-i-dont-hold-charlies-hand-all-the-time-now-but-still-sometimes/#comment-542412 <a href="http://www.salemnews.com/punews/local_story_183232707.html">Mother in cancer case lost custody of older child</a> Mother in cancer case lost custody of older child

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