With friends like us…
I have a friend who has both parents in a nursing home. Like me, she also has young children at home, but her parents live a state away.
Her mother has some dementia and her father cared for her until they were in a pretty severe car accident about a year ago. Her mother was sent to a nursing home for rehab, but her dementia worsened and her father couldn’t take care of her.
Her father has diabetes, and wasn’t caring for himself properly, so he was admitted to the same nursing home, temporarily. It turned out that he had many other health problems that he didn’t tell anyone about and he likely had pretty extensive cancer all over his body.
He deteriorated gradually and my friend went to say her goodbyes a couple of weeks ago and he died over the weekend.
There are several of us in our close group of friends who have lost a parent, so we hope to show her she’s not alone, but she might wish she was alone by the time we get finished.
There’s one friend who lost her mother 10 years ago, and when our friend asked how long it takes to stop crying at unexpected moments, she helpfully replied, “Oh, it’s been 10 years and I still do it!”
Maybe this was a “you had to be there” moment, but our friend replied, “Um, thanks?”
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If you would like to enter for a chance to win the surprise gift behind this blog post, please leave a comment. Prize and Winner will be announced within a week. Check back to see if you’re the lucky winner and what you’ve won! You also have lots of chances to win great Blogtoberfest prizes!
ADDED: We have a winner!
Thank you for this opportunity, I love surprises
My grandfather passed 4 years ago and it still hits me at random moments…so sorry for the loss of anyone’s loved one.
Both my husband and I have lost all of our grandparents. For the most part, our parents are really healthy, but I still worry about when the time comes.
My Mother in law passed away in May of this year, just a few days before Mother’s Day – the first year of events I feel is always the hardest. The first birthday, Christmas, wedding etc. My Father-in-law passed away 11 years ago, and we still miss him too.
Someone once told me that the death of a loved one hurts so much because we are not grieving that their life was cut short – we are grieving for our own loss, that the person is no longer in our lives. Something to think about.
Even though my dad passed away 23 years ago, I still have my moments of missing him terribly. The holidays are still extremely hard as well as birthdays and anniversaries.
Thank you for the opportunity to participate in this giveaway!
ok surpprise me
It is nice that you have each other in that way. I sort of have to depend on… well… this blog. After 4 years, I have wondered myself, when I was going to finally “get past it.” Nice to know I am not alone in this respect.
PLEASE COUNT ME IN ON THIS AWESOME GIVEAWAY
My father died eight years ago but time heals all wounds. We didn’t have a great relationship (okay, it was terrible) but losing someone is still painful. It’s good to tell people that grieving is okay, in whatever way you feel comfortable with.
When I was 11, I had to start taking care of my grandmother. fortunately, she died before life really became a nightmare.
Good story.
I have not lost anyone close to me yet. I do not know how I will handle it when the time does come
count me in on the win thanks for the chance
I cannot seem to get over my mother’s death. Sometimes out of the blue something will trigger a memory of her and the tears will start to flow.
Please enter me
I just can’t even imagine, my heart was broken for months after my grandmother died – and always will be, a little bit.
It’s been six years since I lost my mother and there are times where I’ll cry thinking about her.
i love surprises!
There is not one hour of the day that I don’t think of my late parents, both of whom I lost in under 3 years, and having lost my only sibling 12 years ago. Time does lessen the pain, but it never fully goes away, and the void will always be there. I’m just so glad that I have no regrets in that I was a good daughter to them both.
I would tell her that she may never get over the odd trigger of tears— for almost no reason. However, with time, they become less frequent.