Women: Respect Yourselves
May 8, 2009 by Aly Walansky
Filed under Relationships
Remember my friend who was in a “friends with benefits” situation with a friend who had suddenly met someone else – and felt it was cool to gush to her about the new girl?
Well, new girl is still in the picture – but last night, the guy stopped by for a brief visit to my friend’s place, and in the forty minutes he was there, they managed to get naked – again – followed by him getting all weird, and making an abrupt exit.
At this point, I’ve stopped blaming the guy. Clearly, he has issues. But my friend? Glutton for punishment, if you ask me. How can we expect the men in our lives to respect us, or take us seriously, when we perpetuate the same self-destructive patterns over and over?
My friend is in love with this guy, clearly. She can call it friends with benefits, or whatever, but the truth is, she’s just looking for any way to be with him, not realizing this is the only way she will ever be with him at all. And I’m just so sad for her, but I don’t know what advice to give anymore.
Image: Sxc.hu
Aly, your friend needs to read He’s Just Not That Into You. Don’t just suggest it, but actually purchase it and put it in her hand. My friend suggested it for almost a year before I finally read it. And if she won’t read it, then you get it and read it out loud to her. It’s not going to sink in otherwise. And it will hurt, but in the end she will be able to move on.
I agree with Michelle. I’m just glad your friend didn’t have any kids with this guy.