Comments on: Working Mothers of Autistic Children 2

By: Sheea Johnson

Sheea Johnson — Mon, 03 Nov 2008 00:04:24 +0000

Hi, I too have that same problem,I have a 7 yr. old with classic autism and who is also deaf.I work full time with toddlers all day and my husband is an emt with crazy hrs, It’s sooo hard to keep my apt. clean,it is always a wreck i’m ashamed to have people over most of the time,they think I don’t know how to clean or i’m lazy,which is farthest from the truth.My son spills food and beverages everywhere and I try to clean up behind him but it just gets overwhelming,It dosen’t seem to bother my husband to much but it really bothers me. I try to clean on the weekend but i’m sooo tired and that time I spend with my son,I’m seriously considering hiring a cleaner to come in once a week to help.I’m so glad that there are other families going through the same thing.

By: vivian

vivian — Thu, 16 Oct 2008 16:45:17 +0000

i am a single working mom with a 3 year old daughter who is suspected to have ASD and a 4 year old son who is normal. both at this point are a bit incorrigible and i am sometimes feeling stressed. i bring my daughter to two therapy sessions every week. it’s kinda difficult on my part because my daughter’s case has not been diagnosed with exact clarity. her therapists say she does not show signs of classic autism but her inability to speak, the delay in maturity, sleeping disorders and outbursts is quite questionable. i am at a loss right now on how to discipline my kids. although it’s easier with the older one because he is normal, it becomes difficult when he becomes jealous and insecure about the attention and understanding i extend to his younger sister. i try so hard to explain to him that his sister is not normal yet often times he forgets… this are the difficult times. sometimes i am tempted to send him off to his dad, thinking that would be easier, but i tell myself that this is an adjustment phase for him and me. i think though lately that this effort of mine has slowly become rewarding… when it is me who is losing my temper, it is my son who reminds me that my daughter is not well. God is good. patience i know will get me there.

the mess in the house is exhausting, whenever my daughter gets hold of the milk she ends up giving herself a bath with it. i try very hard to child proof the place but somehow as she is growing she is learning more and more how to find her way to reach for the things that she shouldn’t be holding. this is quite difficult… when you think something is fine where it is… she will prove you wrong. eventually i think i will have to put the stuff on the roof.. haha. this is still an unresolved problem. i hate pests and dirt. my kids get more baths in a day than my dishes do. i find it hard to live in mess. even when i feel tired, i tell my self… one step at a time… one toy in the box at a time… one blanket at a time. i know my son is learning from me because at his young age he picks up after his sister… that i am very proud of.

my daughters eating disorders are still a problem. she was already 2 years old when she learned how to eat solid food. i make sure though that she gets through meals. it’s a constant reminder for her to keep to her seat. she will yell, cry and even spit out the food… but somehow she does get through without wandering around. the spitting is the worse. i saw her once spit at her therapist when she was singing to her. my daughter does not like to hear people singing or clapping… all these annoy her. all this i am still working on. my daughter is really smart, she learned how to count earlier than her brother did. these were one of the few words that she first learned to say. everyday i remain positive, my daughter will improve. i pray a lot. i hope in my heart, she will be ok.

i have been lucky to find a job that where i get to work at home. although this is good for me, i dont think it works for all women who are in my situation. it can get stressful to be around an autistic child all day. eventually when the stress gets into us, we become a liability. other women who i know who have the same problem have found ways to get help from family and friends.

a lot of prayer and hard work… i think one day i might open my own day care for autistic children… who knows.

By: Yolanda

Yolanda — Thu, 17 Jul 2008 15:41:12 +0000

Hi, I am the mother of a 4year old with ASD. I am depressed and stressed. My husband and I seperated approximately 9 mths ago. I also have an 11year old. This has been a strain. I quite my job in Sept 07 because that was too much stress on top of taking care of my daughter. There never seemed like enough time to do everything. I am being treated for my depression but not to the extent that I need since I dont have health coverage. I am now looking for work and trying to find a job that will give me the hours I need so that I am able to take my daughter to speech and the specialist has been insane! I just want to pull my hair out some days. I also sae some of the comments on taking care of the house. Even being home there never seems to be time to clean. I dont have a real sleep schedule. She just began sleeping straight thru the nights about 2 mths ago for the first time since birth. So now that she is sleeping thru the night I still dont know how to sleep at night. Its crazy but I love my girls and wouldnt trade this crazy life for nothin!

By: Averi

Averi — Fri, 13 Jun 2008 18:12:53 +0000

I stumbled upon this website today, wow I feel better knowing other people struggle as much with their house as I do.I have an a VERY hyper autistic 3 yr old who no matter what, manages to plug up the toilet daily, spill a gallon of milk,attack his 8yr old sister and spill water all over our carpet> so we never have clean towels,and are carpet looks horrible along with every room in are apartment,I’m a stay at home mom,who basically is the only person who attempts to clean anything,I have to constantly be with my son so as to stop him from hurting himself or are animals or sister, He doesn’t understand cause and effect,I’m trying not to blame him, but our whole lives are turn upside down from him, I’m starting to blame myself,for the house,for the unorganized life we live the screaming,that he does,my 8yr old also screams now and is always angry.I would like help from my husband but he just yells or huffs and puffs and expects me to take care of the kids all the time but I never get a break from my son, because no else knows how to deal with his behaviors,and I’m terrified no one will watch him well enough.Yesterday We got a letter on our door saying we were violating are lease cause are house is not clean up to their standards which that makes me feel like a nasty person,but all I do is TRY to clean all day, but I look and u can’t even tell cause he is obsessed with me moving his things?? so he puts them right back in the same spot and position.or throws a fit untill I let him do it.I don’t have any one thats in my position, and people are shocked to see my place so I never want anyone in please ,someone talk to me.about how they cope, or learn not to blame themselves, or how to deal without feeling resentment.

By: shelly

shelly — Thu, 01 May 2008 09:23:34 +0000

there is a site called homejobstop.com for online jobs. You might want to try Typeamom.net get paid to write articles about motherhood. Another thing Selling Avon I have researched a lot of mothers are now considering that as extra income in the home.

By: Sherry Hayes

Sherry Hayes — Wed, 30 Apr 2008 19:59:59 +0000

Hi, I was wondering do any of you moms work from home online? I am looking for a lagite online job so I can be at home.

Thank You, Sherry Hayes

By: Kristina Chew, PhD

Kristina Chew, PhD — Fri, 11 Apr 2008 16:41:57 +0000

We’ve seen so many good things with our son — things are happening already!

By: shelly

shelly — Fri, 11 Apr 2008 16:17:49 +0000

I am so glad for you kristina. It is truly a rollercoster ride but thank God for family. Thank God for family… Iam praying for everybody on this blog. I truly believe a breakthrough will happen with autism

By: Kristina Chew, PhD

Kristina Chew, PhD — Sat, 05 Apr 2008 05:23:35 +0000

@shelly, I could not do it without my mom—she buys all of my son’s clothes—-my parents live far away but visit frequently and help us keep things us in more ways than I can describe. Charlie is learning to do more and more things around the house and to enjoy doing this.

By: $6200 Less a Year: Loss of Income in Families with Autistic Children

$6200 Less a Year: Loss of Income in Families with Autistic Children — Sat, 05 Apr 2008 05:00:34 +0000

[...] visit several times a year), understanding colleagues. There have been a lot of times when I have wondered if working was the right thing for me to do and so far I know it has, though I admit I might be less stressed if I were a [...]