May 17, 2008 by Kristina Chew, PhD
Filed under Disability Rights, Religion
This story about a Catholic priest filing a restraining order against the parents of an autistic 13-year-old to keep them from attending church on Sundays in Bertha, Minnesota, is why resources like this are more than needed—-and a spirit of inclusion and mutuality.
[...] of autistic individuals from public places has been a hot topic of discussion in the wake of a Minnesota priest filing a restraining order against the parents of an autistic 13-year-old, Adam Race. In Manteca, California, the therapy dog [...]
[...] probably doesn’t seem to be anything much to report, especially given other things going on this week. Charlie and I haven’t been to the playground in a while—in several [...]
[...] about Adam Race and the parish of St. Joseph’s continues—–and here’s another case involving an autistic child and a [...]
[...] the back-and-forth about 13-year-old Adam Race, deep pressure was mentioned as a technique to help calm an autistic individual. Animal science [...]
[...] epic comment thread (as one long-time reader put it) about Adam Race and the parish of St. Joseph’s rages on. Goes without saying that it’ll be of more than a little interest when a hearing is [...]
[...] Priest Files Restraining Order Against Parents of Autistic 13-year-old Some 250-plus comments about Adam Race and the parish of St. Joseph’s in Bertha, Minnesota. [...]
[...] the 290th comment in the discussion about Adam Race and the priest restraining order, a question was asked about [...]
[...] that this propaganda reaches far and wide, not only into our homes, but even into our schools and churches. I want the Barton family to know that they have my full support, along with many others. I was [...]
[...] restraining order was filed against the parents of Adam Race by a priest in Bertha, Minnesota, regarding Adam [...]
[...] the past two weeks, one post after another has been about the exclusion of autistic individuals: 13-year-old Adam Race from church—and by a restraining order. 5-year-old Alex Barton from his kindergarten [...]
[...] of excluding autistic children: A restraining order was filed against the parents of 13-year-old Adam Race because of his “dangerous” behaviors in church. 5-year-old Alex Barton was “voted [...]
[...] Carol Race took the stand at a hearing in Long Prairie, Minnesota, over the restraining order filed against her 13-year-old son, Adam Race, by the Church of St. Joseph in Bertha. From WDAY.com: [...]
[...] Huliq News cites the recent cases of Adam Race, Alex Barton, and Jarret Farrell, all of whose stories have received much attention in the media. [...]
[...] judge has upheld the restraining order barring 13-year-old Adam Race from attending church in St. Joseph’s parish in Bertha, Minnesota. From KSAX: Todd County [...]
[...] and about special needs children, being removed (physically, in some cases) from public spaces: A Minnesota church, more than one airplane, a kindergarten classroom. I’ve followed many of these cases on my [...]
[...] especially in the wake of more than a few stories of autistic children who have been removed from a church, a kindergarten classroom, an airplane, and a restaurant. In each case, the children’s [...]
[...] seems to be, sadly, reflective of the sentiments of more than a few anonymous commenters about Adam Race and Alex [...]
[...] and also many recent reports of autistic children and adults getting very upset in public places (a church, an airplane) and of the bafflement of bystanders and (in some cases) police and other first [...]
[...] a priest filed a restraining order against the parents of 13-year-old Adam Race back in May, there was a lot of (often very heated) discussion about the exclusion and inclusion of [...]
[...] was dominated by two stories, that of 13-year-old Adam Race, against whose parents a priest filed a restraining order, and of 5-year-old Alex Barton, who was voted out of his kindergarden class by his classmates, at [...]
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Jeff lives in New York with his wife Jill and two small sons. He is the author of Alex: The Fathering of a Preemie and Alex the Boy: Episodes From a Family’s Life With Autism, and maintains a sit... more
Jill used to write frequently about food, until having kids made writing frequently impossible. She is the author of "Have a Nice Trip," first published in Brain, Child Magazine, which is her resp... more
Jeff Stimpson
Jill Cornfield
An interview with Carol Race posted on MomLogic.
Momlogic: Tell us about your experiences with Adam at church.
Carol: Up until June last year, I don’t believe anyone had complaints against him. It seems like in the spring of 2007, there were more complaints among parishioners. Unless you’re used to what my son does, it can be shocking. Mostly he makes humming noises. Often it’s his physical position. We always sit in the back pew–he would lay on the floor, lay on the pew, sometimes he would hop the pew to go to the empty space in the back. If his anxiety level is very high, we use fleece strips to tie his hands or feet–I tie one end on one wrist and one on the other and I hold it with one of my hands. It’s a mechanical advantage. We keep that on for however he needs it.
He doesn’t want to misbehave. Once he refused to go into church until it was tied on his ankle. I realized he was afraid of what might happen and he did have an anxiety attack later. It isn’t something he fights against. Once he gets it on his wrist it doesn’t take long for him to calm down. It’s almost as if he says, “Good! Mom’s got control so I can relax.” It’s during these moments when he has a bout of anxiety that frightens other parishioners, because they don’t understand the mechanisms. It’s shocking when people don’t understand autism and don’t understand meltdowns. But these are simple anxiety attacks, and no one is in danger. I haven’t been given the opportunity to explain. People on the outside say that these are violent outbursts. On May 9, the policeman came to our house and delivered the restraining order.
Momlogic: How did Adam take the news?
Carol: He knows things are going on about him. The first couple of days after the media story broke he just slept all day. I’ve attended every Mass for the last 12 years. Except for one time where we had to wrestle him down, I don’t believe he was disruptive. Is there disruption going on? Yes, if you hear it, but it’s not the sound that disrupts them, it’s the thoughts about the sound that disrupts. If it brings up the thoughts, “I don’t know why they’re at church” or “I don’t like that family” then yes, it is disruptive. But that’s where spiritual leadership comes in.
I am currently going to another Mass with Adam. The people there are nervous because they don’t know what to expect. The first few Sundays they have to get used to how Adam is. The last couple of months he has been doing very well, he sits, stands and kneels and tries to do the sign of the cross. He hasn’t really been making noises at church.
http://www.momlogic.com/2008/06/autistic_child_kicked_out_of_c.php#over1
Here is the link for the MomLogic interview of Carol Race.
Have any of you seen the new web site called -
Project: Adam’s Pew ?? I stumbled upon it and find it quite interesting. Can Carol and John really feel wanted at their old parish (St. Joseph’s) church. I would be so ashamed by all this media, and publicity (much of it is negative).
What a shame for this small town. Carol seemed to glow in the lime light, loving all the attention. Where does she find time to properly care for her demanding family needs? Her priorities seem disturbing to me.
Once again I read an interview with Carol Race.
She was being totally disengenious.
Adam attended mass there for 12 years to her own admission. They didn’t file the order because he had his wrists bound, because he was making noise etc as she states. They encouraged her for 12 years to bring her son and awarded her for her efforts to bring disabled children into the church community.
They filed a restraining order when his behaviors became not disruptive but dangerous to others and she refused to acknowledge that fact and effectively evaluate her son’s needs, the fact that she again does that in this article shows her total lack of honesty on the issue. I think the one she is harming by her disconnect is her son.
Adam is extremely overstimulated by mass at this time in a public setting. She accuses others of wanting him not to be autistic. Her behaviors are the ones trying to make Adam act like a non autist.
She needs to accept what she can’t change right now(-Adam is overstimulated by the church setting-)change the things that she can-(have him attend mass in a less stimulating environment which the priest he hates offered) and have THE WISDOM to know the difference.
Once again I read an interview with Carol Race.
She was being totally disengenious.
Adam attended mass there for 12 years to her own admission. They didn’t file the order because he had his wrists bound, because he was making noise etc as she states. They encouraged her for 12 years to bring her son and awarded her for her efforts to bring disabled children into the church community.
They filed a restraining order when his behaviors became not disruptive but dangerous to others and she refused to acknowledge that fact and effectively evaluate her son’s needs, the fact that she again does that in this article shows her total lack of honesty on the issue. I think the one she is harming by her disconnect is her son.
Adam is extremely overstimulated by mass at this time in a public setting. She accuses others of wanting him not to be autistic. Her behaviors are the ones trying to make Adam act like a non autist.
She needs to accept what she can’t change right now(-Adam is overstimulated by the church setting-)change the things that she can-(have him attend mass in a less stimulating environment which the priest she hates offered) and have THE WISDOM to know the difference.
Dee Dee I’m sorry this has hit such a sore spot for you.
Sometimes though our behaviors or lack of consideration of others have consequences.
This church loved and encouraged this family to participate for 12 years. It even nominated and awarded the mother for her work within the catholic church to educate the church on how to include disabled persons & worked in the community with disabled persons to attend church.
Adam did not wake up at the age of 12 and develope Autism. The church “never complained until 2007″ according to the mother. She blames the change on a new priest because she isn’t acknowledging that at puberty Adam is going through some changes in behavior and her ability to physically control his behavior changes has diminished because of his size.
Sometimes our desires to include our children and find ways to accomodate their special needs have to be tempered by a thoughtful consideration of what is best for our children.
Adam is greatly stimulated by the mass AT THIS TIME, maybe as puberty progresses that will diminish and the issue can be readdressed.
If you knew a situation caused your child escalating stress reactions each week would you honestly insist on taking him into that situation?
Once again I also read an interview.
“Leaders of the Church of St. Joseph once felt the same way, but not anymore. They say Race’s autistic son Adam is disruptive and his erratic behavior threatens the safety of other parishioners.”
If disruptive and erratic behavior and the treat of what “might” happen oppose to what “did” happen is all it takes to be banned from the church, how many parishioners and priests will be banned from attending mass next week?
If you knew a situation caused your child escalating stress reactions each week would you honestly insist on taking him into that situation?
BTDT in church.
Chuck-engine revving in parking lot with history of crashing family’s vehicles. is not just a minor issue.
I think you honestly would not allow that to continue with your child. Nor would you think that revving a car engine was an appropriate way to calm your child at home.
I took the keys to the family car, started it up, and accidently knocked it out of park and ran the car into a wall of my home when I was 6.
The church hasn’t banned me yet.
” Nor would you think that revving a car engine was an appropriate way to calm your child at home.”
Some days I WISH it was that easy.
Chuck: Acceptance, understanding and toleration are two-way streets. You weren’t a danger to other church-goers when you were 6 and had an incident with your family car at your home. Adam is doing this at the Church, multiple times, and with other families’ vehicles. These types of incidents are classified as vehicular hijacking or grand theft auto in many places. If when you knocked the car out of park you hit several people at church rather than a wall at your home, would you expect a reaction? What if this was part of a pattern of multiple incidents? It’s easy to be angry at the world, but if we want acceptance or want to be a part of the world, is there not a responsibility to be rationally understanding of other people’s feelings?
Multiple times? I had only heard of the one incident. If this was “multiple times” you would think other parishioners, knowing the situation, would have taken extra measures to accommodate the family and ensure safety. Like locking their cars and not leaving the keys in them.
Joey Mom at some point it has to be the parent’s responsibility to have proper supervision of their Child.
Having a disability may make one more prone to inappropriate activities but Adam is not untrainable or without the ability to be supervised.
If our children are in settings where we can’t supervise them properly without being a physical risk to others then we need to reevaluate where we are taking them.
Accomodation and respect is a two way street.
Adam should have the ability to be supervised properly. From what I have read Carol is involved with “Adam’s Pew” and going to court and speaking on tv. Plus Adam is on some dairy, gluten free diet. That takes a lot of time to prepare those speciality foods. Maybe she has her priorities wrong. She should be raising a family, as that takes a lot of time. She is wasting her time going to court. I am a parent and I follow the rules of society. If I choose to show up where I had a restraining order against me, that would be breaking the law. Choices, some people can make the right choices, some people make the wrong choices.
Carol Race’s response in the Star Tribune was most telling: “I totally understand that the church environment in this case has to be safe.
But the bottom line is one out of 150 births includes an autistic child and as a society we have to deal with it. We have to be able to go out to church and restaurants and events as one family.”
So Ms. Race, an activist, self-proclaimed “Moses” of families with autistic children, admits that her out-of-control son poses a safety risk to others. But everyone else still has to conform to her politically correct views of inclusion.
The judge sensibly put public safety first: your rights to accommodation end where others’ rights to public safety begin.
Still find it odd that the judge would use the word “harassment regarding Adam Race.