So, this is guilt…
September 6, 2006 by kate baggott
Filed under Mental Health
I came home from work to a feverish baby. I am not sure if its teething, or an infection from the cold we’ve all had. As soon as I came home, she nursed furiously and then vomitted all over me and her brother. It is now a dose of paracetemol and a bath later. She seems much, much happier, but I have my fingers crossed for tomorrow.
You might think that I feel guilty for working as a result of this sick child day, but I don’t.
Instead, I feel guilty that I have a contract, freelance position with no benefits, vacation, sick or personal leave of any kind. In short, if I don’t work, there is no money. If I take a day off without pay to stay home with my sick child, the job could just disappear.
I should have seen this coming and gotten myself a job where the rights of workers haven’t been completely eroded…much to the displeasure of pure free-market economists who have filled the evilness vacuum since Communism fell out of power.
In fact, I also feel guilty for not doing more to fight those morally-bankrupt idiots every day of my life up until today.
Guilt, guilt, and more guilt; it just keeps on trucking! I could make a list that perhaps might circle the earth for the things I feel guilty about on a daily basis. The funny thing is I never really indulged that part of myself until after I got pregnant. Interesting how that works. Perhaps I’ll make that list and then burn it in a ritualistic ceremony to ward off the demons.
Yeah. I am all for ritual.
Guilt… yes, it’s a sad thing. I still feel guilty for not breast feeding Britt. Those things just stay with you for years and years. I second “third” the ritual!