While I enjoy writing about my daily attacks of joy, frustration and neurosis, there is a reason why this blog exists.

Babylune: the First Phase of New Motherhood is a blog for women recovering from childbirth. I’ve been writing it since the birth of my second child.

If you’re a brand new mother dealing with immediate issues after the birth of your child, start with the post called, A Long List of Discomforts. Each of the items on the list links to a post on that topic.

If you’re pregnant and looking for some honest advice about what to expect immediately after birth, read Quick and Dirty Advice for Those about to Pop.

The categories along the side of the pink bar after “recent posts” and “recent comments” should take you to the posts about the appropriate point in your own recovery.

When you’re ready to post your birth story, I would love to read it.

And, if you ever have any questions, just send me a comment and I’ll do the research for you.

Good luck and Congratulations,

Kate

P.S. If you’re a new dad wondering if you will ever have sex again, go here, go here and go here. Then, go here to make yourself feel better.

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So, I am not a beautiful, blond and famous comedian. I still have pride.

Of everything I have ever written, I think the long list of discomforts from my own imediate postpartum phase is probably the most honest. Ten postpartum essentials is probably the most important. I am proud of both posts. Especially where I’ve managed to make recovering from childbirth funny.

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Post from: Babylune

I thought, when I wrote the Down There Omnibus, I knew everything there was to know about postpartum hemorrhoids. Nope. Other people manage to write entire books on the subject.

Post from: Babylune

I think about money a lot more now that I work outside the home. Time is money and I don’t think I am being paid properly for my time. Then again, I felt the same way when I earned three times as much.

Today, while on my coffee break at work, I saw a picture of a pen that cost 12,000 Pounds Sterling (not exactly as pictured, but a $250 pen and a $25,000 pen look alike to me). That is about $25,000 US.

Now, there are three ways to look at a picture of a $25,000-pen.

You can look at it and think, “I am so poor and inadequate. I can’t even afford a decent pen.” Which is pretty much what the marketing folks want you to think.

You can consider the image and conclude: “Rich people must be stupid, or that pen would not even exist.”

Or, you can start plotting for ways to get weathy celebrities to sign autographs with their own pens…so that you can ask to “borrow” it.

While plotting petty pen thievery, I realised that celebrities have their uses. Use them to bring traffic to my blog, I admire some of them for their efforts to promote social justice and, I appreciate that they are as capable of mistakes as the rest of us.

But, really, the whole celbrities as news thing has gotten out of hand. Especially since there are mothers everywhere who need attention. In fact, you could probably use a little attention yourself.

So, here is a challenge:

For the next week, every time you find yourself reading celebrity gossip online, in magazines, newspapers and on E! stop and do something for yourself instead. Any of my since you’re sitting there tips or anything you can think of will do. Just remind yourself that you, your energy, your life and health are important.

Much more important than any of those famous people with over-priced pens.

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But, to tell you the truth, I also do it to bring more traffic to the site. And, with any luck, the information those visitors get will eventually help a new mother who deserves some comfort.

My strategy, though, has been deeply flawed. Jolie, Spears, even the Gilmore Girls, are just not big enough blips on the pop culture radar. They really just don’t have enough fans. No, my friends at Play Library, have proven that to really bring people who read to your blog, you need a really big star. Someone like….

My lesson learned, I will now mention Elmo whenever possible, or TMX Elmo as he is now known. He’s not a mom. He’s not recovering from childbirth, but he laughs and laughs. And, what postpartum mother doesn’t need reminding that tummies are for tickling.

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My saving grace came in the form of words from a friend. “It doesn’t get easier,” she said, “but you do get used to it.”

And while you get used to it, you do what you can for your poor body and remember that you and all of your parts are important and deserving of care. If you can get help, take it. Don’t be afraid to ask for what you need and don’t be frightened of needing the support of those who love you.

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Regular life and regular postings start again tomorrow, but in case you missed any of my special vacation features, here’s a round up under the cut.

Omnibus Station

Recovering from a C-Section Omnibus

The “Down There” Omnibus

The Fertility Omnibus

The Abs Omnibus

Random Recovery Moments

On sexual recovery by Marion McBride

On boredom prevention by Belly-Belly

On sleep by Ann Douglas

On expressing emotion by Penelope Leach

Mothering Blogs I Love

Life in Arabia

Life in Trinidad & Tobago

Life in Australia

Life in Thailand

As Long As You’re Sitting There

Sit on a Ball

Point your toes

Drink water

Just relax a little

I hope you’ve had a great summer. See you tomorrow.

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Random recovery moments are little summaries of good advice that are honest enough and funny enough to help you out while I am on vacation. Just not so helpful that these experts, who might actually have the advantage of being qualified, will be able to replace me in your affections.

Today’s RRM comes from the site Belly Belly in Australia.

Today’s topic: boredom. You know what it’s like. Everyone seems to be doing things, living a life, accomplishing accomplishments and you, well, you get spit up on a lot. It need not be so. This article has plenty of ideas for activities you can do with a baby on your back. Ideas range from taking up a new course of study, to visiting the library, to joining a gym. Things that, when you were busy in a different way you may have meant to do, but never had the time for.

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The most wonderful thing that will ever come out of your body is a baby. Milk is the second best thing. After that, it’s just the same old you know what.

And that, my friends, is as true for you as it is for celebrity mothers like Britney Spears and Angelina Jolie.

Now, forget about the paparazzi-hounded for a while and pay attention to me instead.

According to the search engine results, I am the only postpartum blogger who actually writes about the more embarassing side-effects (or is that end-effects?) of giving birth.

So, today’s vacation best-of omnibus features all my past posts about the glamourous stuff that happens “down there” after a woman gives birth.

First, the famous Quick & Dirty Advice for Those About to Pop contains the stuff you might as well memorise before you give birth to get through the first few days postpartum. Seriously, don’t forget to water down your first pee. Save yourself the pain.

After that, there is plenty of blood, piss and poop in A Long List of Discomforts that links to each of the more common conditions women find themselves in after giving birth.

For those of you who have really strained yourselves, read the Babylune Guide to Hemorroids because no one else will tell you how delicate your anus is.

Speaking of anuses, let me tell you why I wrote these posts about things that are so embarrassing to talk about. The postpartum body demands that its owner concern herself with blood, discharge, piss and excrement because if those organs aren’t working properly, you can’t mother properly.

Don’t be disgusted by what happens under the folds of your vulva, between the protective cheeks of your buttox. It may be hidden from view, but these physical systems are as deserving of care and good health as any other body part.

So, if something looks funny, smells funny, or stops working and you don’t know why, get yourself to a doctor or midwife and talk about it. There is nothing those folks haven’t heard before. Deal?

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