Obviously, the lack of energy to do anything about my daughter’s sleep patterns has nothing to do with her. In fact, I don’t think I’ve slept through the night since I was 6 months pregnant with my first child. Obviously, stress is an issue and, even though I know yoga and deep breathing, exercise and reading all help me disengage, my mind is a very active thing…and that’s not good.  

I know that things can be different.

Last summer, I took three weeks off. Not only did we go away, but I stepped away from the computer. I pre-wrote blog entries and articles, I stopped reading newspapers (or anything else) on the Internet and I just focussed on where I was and who I was with. I think it was the only time in the past ten years that I have done, or thought about doing, one thing at a time. It wasn’t all easy. For the first week I was crabby without my usual fix of information and my sister in-law and I had our first ever argument. Actually, due to language differences, we had to have it twice. Other than those very regrettable episodes though, I know I was calmer by the end.

I can’t disengage right now. Even though I am about to take some time off from my teaching job, it’s because I have a huge writing project to do.  Planning the project, making arrangements for the support I need to do it properly and  worries about it have been filling my mind. Day care issues that have come up while I’ve been teaching and preparing have felt like bigger worries than they really are. My husband and I have been arguing about housework and the list of things to do has been running through my mind all the time.

Obviously, I can’t just disengage from everything right now, but it seems to me that I can learn how to compartmentalize my life, to deal with one thing at a time and enjoy it all a little more.

The question is, how to learn? Do you have any ideas? I think it’s time for me to explore all the options. It’s time for another experiment on myself.

Post from: Babylune