The Baby Psychic
June 20, 2006 by kate baggott
Filed under Baby Care
Baby communication has never seemed like a big deal to me. Both kids taught us simple hand signals for use in games they play with their father and to tell me when to feed them. And, in between we pay rapt attention to their babbling and the closer attention we pay, the closer they listen. Since my kids have 3 languages used in their daily lives, we model listening very closely and talk our way through every little task. That said, I often wonder why people who tell parents to talk to their children constantly, forget to mention that they need to listen too.
For example, when you ask a baby, “Would you like some milk?” wait with an expectant look on your face for them to respond.
While it’s doubtful that the tot will reply, “Why, yes, mummy. You know I always enjoy a little tipple mid-morning.” You can expect them to give a positive shout of sheer delight. This is baby language for “BRING ON THE MILK.”
It’s only natural, I think, to communicate with our babies over more complicated issues too.
I bring this up, after reading a report in the Guardian about Derek Ogilvie who claims to communicate telepathically with babies.
- (Ogilvie) is also very excited because tonight, he says, he is the very first British psychic to star in his own terrestrial television series. (Satellite television doesn’t count.) “Psychics are the new rock’n'roll, but the most important thing for me is credibility. I’ve had success. I was a millionaire. I’ve had a Rolls-Royce and a Bentley and I wasn’t happy. What I’m doing now is completely me. Tony Blair is the prime minister, Eriksson is the England manager and I speak to babies. That’s how real this is.”
- Over the next month, in four documentaries, Ogilvie combines the three national obsessions: badly behaved children, extra-sensory powers and transformative telly.
From the article, it sounds like Ogilvie is Super Nanny combined with Uri Gellor. I am not terribly concerned about the accuracy of the psychic or whether psychic powers exist at all (although I am getting a powerful vibration that says, “this is total crap”). Instead, what stirred up my reaction to the piece was the very ridiculous idea that any parent needs a mediator to communicate with his or her own child.
I feel the stirrings of a manifesto. To understand your child, just focus on eye contact, skin to skin contact, time and listening very carefully. And, if you they can’t always accept your consolation, give them your sympathy and company.
Thanks for the honesty. I was getting the same vibe.
My baby’s (1 year) doc was bothered by the fact that he isn’t pointing at things that he wants yet. “Even his bottle? He doesn’t point to his bottle when he wants it?” she queried. “No, he doesn’t. He looks at me, he looks at his bottle, then he looks back at me. If I don’t give it to him, he gives me a dirty look and cries.” That’s communication!!! And, sadly, bottles are now over. He has to pick something else to give me dirty looks about.
I totally agree, Kate. Babies are able to understand and communicate so much more than a lot of parents give them credit for. What irks me the most is when a child babbles something and the parent looks at me with a flush of embarrassment and tells the child/me, “I have no idea what she just said.” Well, intuit it! What is the context? As a last resort say, “That’s very interesting.” To throw up one’s hands and give up leads to frustration for everyone.
I have the first episode of that show recorded! I’ll watch it soon and let you know how much crap they’re doling out!
I just saw a related stories in the Scotsman and the Times. (Article at Supernanny Rules.) Needless to say, I’m a bit skeptical. Did anyone see the show?
Oh but it’s true!!! I communicate telepathically with my kids all the time. For instance, without even so much as an uttered word, I can tell with 100% accuracy:
a) when Caleb has pooed his diaper
b) when Ella’s room needs cleaning and
c) when I’m on the edge and in need of a holiday.
Amazing. Just amazing.
Hsien, I am waiting for your report.
Baldman, we’ll get it from Hsien as soon as we can. I think we both need to hear from her.
Twocat, some people just don’t know how to listen. It does seem to me that the article described test cases where people just didn’t spend much time with their kids.
Kerri- Don’t worry. He’ll find plenty of reason to give you dirty looks. Mine seldom stops.
That guy was on the news here in the UK on Monday and we ( my Partner and I ) were laughing because we thought what a crock of shite this guy is sprouting garbage. He had this woman with her toddler who I think was about one years old sitting there and the mother was saying all this stuff about how the baby screamed and screamed and screamed until this guy, the so called baby psychic, came into her life and instantly calmed her. Now was it because she kept leaving the baby in the cot to cry? without attention? or without plenty of cuddles? that is what it seemed like to us. She appeared hard somehow like the old school mam who knows best and ‘pandering’ to her baby just was not going to happen unless it was at the allocated time in her own scheduelle each day. They showed a video clip from his new program where he goes and picks up the screaming child and tells the mother that the ‘baby’ is saying to him that she needs her mother to hold her and to feed her. Please! Like that would be rocket science to a relatively new mother.
I am not saying that when a child decides it is going to scream for the Nation it is pleasant. No no no. We all know what that is like. You change the nappy, feed the baby, cuddle the baby, put music on and gently try and rock the baby calm but nothing, absolutely nothing you do will stop this child from screaming. In walks someone who has not seen the last half an hour or heard it and instantly upon connection with the child there is quiet. “How did you do that?” you ask wanting to kill from frustration and retreat feeling neglected and useless.
Babies are just like people. They have their own personalities and sometimes just dont know what is up, he or she just knows they feel miserable and needs to cry.
This Baby Psychic is nothing more than showman in my opnion. Making money out of the obvious.
Helen
Amen, Helen.
OK. So I got to watch the recorded show tonight and to tell you the truth, I felt incredibly sad and depressed while watching it.
The family featured was a 19-year-old single mother taking care of an almost 2-year-old little girl. They didn’t appear to have much of a support system and BOTH of them spent most of their time screaming and crying.
Derek Ogilvie might seem like a kook but at least he was the only reasonable person with the knowledge and desire to help them change for the better. I’m sure he was fed the information he had about the mother’s past sexual abuse but the tasks he set out for her couldn’t have been better:
1. Get counseling to overcome her past.
2. Do positive things with her daughter like play on a trampoline and dress-up as a fairy (where this girl gets the money to buy this stuff when she doesn’t work is beyond me).
3. Improve her daughter’s diet. This young mum didn’t even know you were supposed to peel a carrot before eating it! The show encouraged her by showing her some of the magazines with baby food recipes and she did quite well cooking it!
4. Develop a better relationship with her own mother (grandma) so as to nurture her support network.
None of these things were bad or wrong and Derek took the time to be kind, sympathetic, and helpful.
I liked the show. It’s much gentler than Supernanny but I also think the families he helps may actually have much deeper issues than the families featured in Supernanny. I’ll find out more next week with the following episode.
Just a note that I had more to say about the show at Supernanny Rules.
I’ve watched all 4 shows now and have to say I was amazed at how many things he picked up about the various families. Okay so he could have been tipped off by the researchers…
I know we’re all supposed to be very sceptical these days but seeing the way the kids and parents ended up happier and more contented maybe there’s something in it. To be honest if it works (and I believe he only charges for shows and books, not directly helping families) then surely that’s got to be good.
I have to say I’ve read some criticism of him from religious people which is a bit unwarrantied. So Derek’s a fake but we need to believe in something that cannot be seen or proven…or is that the other way round?