Comments on: The Help, Wisdom & Annoyances of Grandmothers

By: Babylune - How Do You Measure Relationship Progress?

Babylune - How Do You Measure Relationship Progress? — Fri, 23 Mar 2007 15:07:06 +0000

[...] he had his own emotions about our growing family and more chaotic household to process. My mother-in-law also died when the baby was only [...]

By: kbaggott

kbaggott — Fri, 23 Jun 2006 05:46:17 +0000

“All the crazy thoughts that used to go through my head reviewing all the parenting “mistakes” my parents committed with me. I only onw realize that the hormones, emotions, and exhaustion made it impossible for me communicate effectively and appreciate my MIL.”

I think you hit the nail on the head there, Hsien.

By: Hsien Lei

Hsien Lei — Fri, 23 Jun 2006 00:34:45 +0000

My mother-in-law is a tremendous help and even then, I was in no shape post-partum to truly appreciate it. All the crazy thoughts that used to go through my head reviewing all the parenting “mistakes” my parents committed with me. I only onw realize that the hormones, emotions, and exhaustion made it impossible for me communicate effectively and appreciate my MIL. I have repented now. *whew* I feel better.

PS I think I was in the middle of moving from Vietnam to London when your mother-in-law passed away and never heard the news. *hugs* I hope your husband is doing alright.

By: Kate

Kate — Thu, 22 Jun 2006 16:03:58 +0000

“But, at least if we’ve tried to communicate rationally the first time, it won’t be completely unfounded when we irrationally blow up the second.”

Now you’re cracking me up!

By: Kerri

Kerri — Thu, 22 Jun 2006 15:25:45 +0000

There, I think I would be less judgmental, and just tell her to communicate with her honestly (nearly impossible in some relationships, I know). But, at least if we’ve tried to communicate rationally the first time, it won’t be completely unfounded when we irrationally blow up the second.

By: Kate

Kate — Thu, 22 Jun 2006 14:52:28 +0000

That grandmother very obviously had her own life and I respect that, but I think it just goes to show that some relationships are just not family-oriented. I am sure she buys the kids wonderful presents, but a rested mother resulting from some quality activity with her grandchildren would be the nicer present.

That said, what would your judgemental reaction be to a mother who resents her interfering mother or mother-in-law who is just trying to help?

By: Kerri

Kerri — Thu, 22 Jun 2006 14:32:58 +0000

You crack me up! Stupid cow is probably what I would have thought, too, and probably would have verbalized a very judgmental, “WHY?” I know many moms who have all the help in the world with the first, and feel completely abandoned with the second, third, or fourth. No, we no longer need instruction with changing or burping the baby, but a clean load of laundry or dishes would mean the world!