This One is For the Girls

My life is often chaotic and time-starved. Sometimes, I am in the depths of homesickness and at others I am completely involved in where I am, who I am with and what I am doing. And yet, there is one constant in my life that gets me through: friendship.

Around the world, through my adventures and through the wonders of social networking on the Internet, I have lots of wonderful friends who tolerate my begging for votes in Project Blog, who hold my hand through various crisis and neurosis, who are always there with a happy memory, a kind word or a gentle reminder of promises I have made myself. Others make me laugh through a common thread of experience in the adventures that are womanhood, parenthood and shared humanity.

The charities from the Generous December Group Writing Project were either submitted by personal friends of mine or represent a core value that winds its way through my interactions with friends, whether we went to school together, belong to the same mommy-baby group, work together or read each other’s blogs.

Plus to these gifts there is an element of scrambling to get something done and just running out of time. During this project, my credit card company got suspicious of all the “international internet activity” and canceled my card. This is what I like to call “perfect timing.”

Surprisingly, many charities don’t accept donations by Pay Pal, so that meant where I wanted to donate internationally, I had to donate to the Canadian office so that I could write what my people call “a cheque.” It’s a slow, old-fashioned technology, but it still works.

The first people I turn to in times of great mystery, when I really have no idea how to cope with the two little children who run my life, are other mothers. Angela, who I knew before she started writing Breastfeeding 1-2-3, asked people to remember La Leche League in their holiday giving. In honor of the support I have received from my breastfeeding friends, I sent $15 to La Leche League Canada.

Since women do more than lactate and breastfeed, I wanted to support my friend Christina’s entry in support of the YWCA (I also knew Christina before she started writing SoloMother). I sent the Canadian office of the YWCA a “cheque” for $15.

Madame Meow, who I know through her blog, said this about her favorite charities:

• I find it soothing to my soul to give things I no longer use to places like the Salvation Army or Goodwill or a local church thrift shop. Bonus fact: ringing the Salvation Army bell is actually incredibly fun and rewarding in its own way; but I don’t know where the red kettle is emptied, so I’m not openly endorsing that part.
• I am a packrat, and someone who tends to hold on to things; so when I finally commit to simplifying my existence and putting things in bags and eventually walk through the tinkling door of one of these musty-smelling places, I find a strange peace and a sense of hope.

My friend Cecilia happens to work with people to help them let go of what they no longer need. I know Goodwill and the Salvation Army are both instrumental in helping her work with people who hate waste. Cecilia’s entire family has been of great help and support to me this year and I can’t think of a better way to thank them than to honor the spirit of Madame Meow’s entry. I sent a “cheque” to the Salvation Army Canada to support their work with the poor, the homeless, the sick and lonely with hopes of warmth, safety and love for my friends and everyone.
Two people who submitted their favorite charities through the comments section, are personal friends of mine from different times of my life.

Rhonda, who volunteers for the Stop Food Centre in Toronto, and I were once members of the same professional organization for women working in technology. Our group mentored girls as they learned more about technology, offered low cost training for women who wanted to improve or change their careers, and supported each other’s business efforts. We also had a lot of fun and made a lot of friends. Rhonda, I sent you $10 by PayPal to pass along to the Stop for me in honor of those good times and the many women both of us had the opportunity to work with and befriend.

Julie, who commented in support of Medecins Sans Frontieres, was a classmate of mine when I was in graduate school. Ours has been an endearing friendship and I cannot think of her without also thinking of all my other “friends from school.” Whether it was elementary school, high school, university, or grad school, the one thing me school friends have in common is that they are incredibly engaged with the world.

In her comment, Julie singled out Uganda, a country that gets so little attention. Right now, in Northern Uganda, Ocholi children have to leave their homes for the “safety” of sleeping in public. They can’t sleep at home because they fear the rebels will come and force them into lives as child soldiers or child brides for soldiers. You can learn more about the situation via Gulu Walk.

Julie, when my credit card was canceled, I knew I still had to give something for the Ocholi children you have written about. So I started with Gulu Walk and went to each of their partners looking to make a donation by PayPal. The only taker was War Child Canada and even they were reluctant to accept it. I sent War Child $15 because of their work in Uganda to protect boys from being used as soldiers and girls as “rewards” to be abused. Then I started writing and mailing “cheques” so I thought “Why Not?” and sent $15 to MSF Canada anyway.

Together, these gifts will work to improve the health of mothers and babies, help women break out of poverty, feed the hungry and protect vulnerable children. I wish I could solve those problems, but I know that I can just make small contributions and hope it helps.

I can’t imagine a better way to honor my friends this holiday. Merry Christmas. I hope it’s a good one.