Balancing a Baby and a Beautiful Home

Here’s my philosophy on balancing the responsibilities of a baby and the housecleaning: Your only job as the parent of an infant is not to cross the line from untidy to unsafe. I have found that being the type of parent I want to be has required me to lower my standards when it comes to keeping a home.

Photo by Easternblot

When my child is an infant, my child comes first — first before the dirty dishes in the sink, and first before the unfolded laundry. Those dirty dishes don’t pose a hazard to my baby, nor does the unfolded laundry. So when my baby needs to be nursed, changed, carried or otherwise tended, the baby comes first. And when the baby naps, my needs come next. My needs do not include a sparkling clean home, but rather are often a hot bath, a rest, or eating food when I actually have the opportunity to savor the flavor and not just inhale it.

Now that my baby is a toddler, my standards are rising in keeping with my abilities. My 15-month-old can play independently while I wash her lunch tray and do the dishes. That often was not the case when my daughter was first starting solid foods. The second she started fussing in her high chair or in my lap, we stopped lunch and moved on to her next need — to be cleaned, changed, or entertained. Feeding time needed to be a happy time, and I wasn’t about to let her fuss in her high chair while I tried to clean up. The tray and dishes often went forgotten for hours. Yes it would have been easier to clean them right away, but I prioritized my baby’s immediate needs over the need to keep things sparkling clean at all times. This was true when my baby was an only child, but was even more so when I had two children (and now three).

How does breastfeeding play into all of this? I think breastfeeding makes everything easier. I didn’t have any bottles to sterilize, and breast milk stains are a lot easier to get out of clothes than f*ormula stains! I rested while my baby nursed, and I benefited from the feel-good breastfeeding hormones.

What about you? Have your standards of clean changed since you’ve become a parent?