Ranging from just plain wrong to downright raunchy, lactation consultants (LCs) get called a lot of different names. Some are misguided, some are terms of endearment. These names provide a little breastfeeding humor to augment enhance brighten up your Friday!
Thanks to all the Lactnetters for sharing these substitutes for “Lactation Consultant”:
Location consultant (This is probably the most common. One woman was even listed under the real estate section in her local chamber of commerce directory!)
Lactitian
Lactitionist (as in “nutritionist”?)
Lactritionist
“The lactose intolerant – I mean the lactose tolerant – oh you know, what you are!”
Breast Lady
Milk Lady
Itty Bitty Titty Committee (now …read more

Okay everyone! Find your senses of humor and put on your thinking caps. It’s time to rename Bebe Gloton, the unfortunately named breastfeeding doll! “Bebe Gloton” is a term of endearment for a baby in Spain. (Read more from yesterday’s post: No Special Breastfeeding Doll Necessary).

I sometimes admire my baby’s chubby arms, legs and belly so I suppose it’s not such an awful thing to affectionately call a baby gluttonous. Still, I would think there is a better name out there for a breastfeeding doll. Do you have any suggestions, tongue-in-cheek or otherwise? I have gotten you started with …read more

Talk about multi-tasking! I thought some of you might recognize yourselves in this cartoon I hunted down in honor of Cartoonist Day today. I haven’t gone quite this far but I have strolled the aisles of the grocery store while nursing and pushing the cart!

Listen up people! There has been another sighting of Bottlefeeding In Public (BIP)! Some customers complained to management, but management said BIP was protected by law. So it’s time to get personal. It’s time to launch the Anti-Bottlefeeding Coalition Denounces Eating Freely Campaign (the ABCDEF Campaign for short). Modern society cannot tolerate babies eating from bottles in public! Whether you breastfeed or bottlefeed in the privacy of your own home, in the name of all that is decent, modest, and right, prepare yourself to make the following arguments against BIP:
BIP is unsanitary! You don’t know what’s in that bottle! It …read more

Note to self: If you lean in to inspect a painful white spot on your nipple, and hand-express to see if it is a plugged duct, you might just get a squirt of breastmilk in the eye.

For a laugh, watch as big brother Eddie wants his turn breastfeeding (it’s not what you think)!

Thelma and Louise? Lucy and Ethel?
Have you given your “girls” a nickname? Does your nursling have a special name for your breasts? My breasts — and I am sure the world really needs to know this — are called “mum-mums” (interestingly, the same as the name for nursing, “mum-mum,” while the breast milk is called “mum-mum milk,” as opposed to cow’s milk). As a child (long after I weaned) I called my mother’s breasts Mount Fujis!
Leave a comment and humor us with your own nicknames!

By: Chispita_666