Breastfeeding 1-2-3 » newborn

Balancing a Baby and a Beautiful Home

Angela White, J.D., breastfeeding counselor — Tue, 03 Nov 2009 04:49:16 +0000

Here’s my philosophy on balancing the responsibilities of a baby and the housecleaning: Your only job as the parent of an infant is not to cross the line from untidy to unsafe. I have found that being the type of parent I want to be has required me to lower my standards when it comes to keeping a home.

Photo by Easternblot

When my child is an infant, my child comes first — first before the dirty dishes in the sink, and first before the unfolded laundry. Those dirty dishes don’t pose a hazard to my baby, nor does the unfolded laundry. So when my baby needs to be nursed, changed, carried or otherwise tended, the baby comes first. And when the baby naps, my needs come next. My needs do not include a sparkling clean home, but rather are often a hot bath, a rest, or eating food when I actually have the opportunity to savor the flavor and not just inhale it.

Now that my baby is a toddler, my standards are rising in keeping with my abilities. My 15-month-old can play independently while I wash her lunch tray and do the dishes. That often was not the case when my daughter was first starting solid foods. The second she started fussing in her high chair or in my lap, we stopped lunch and moved on to her next need — to be cleaned, changed, or entertained. Feeding time needed to be a happy time, and I wasn’t about to let her fuss in her high chair while I tried to clean up. The tray and dishes often went forgotten for hours. Yes it would have been easier to clean them right away, but I prioritized my baby’s immediate needs over the need to keep things sparkling clean at all times. This was true when my baby was an only child, but was even more so when I had two children (and now three).

How does breastfeeding play into all of this? I think breastfeeding makes everything easier. I didn’t have any bottles to sterilize, and breast milk stains are a lot easier to get out of clothes than f*ormula stains! I rested while my baby nursed, and I benefited from the feel-good breastfeeding hormones.

What about you? Have your standards of clean changed since you’ve become a parent?

Post from: Breastfeeding 1-2-3

Wordless Wednesday: Precious Newborn Nursing

Angela White, J.D., breastfeeding counselor — Wed, 14 Jan 2009 18:22:41 +0000

Photo credit: benklocek

Post from: Breastfeeding 1-2-3

Free Breastfeeding Video Demonstrates Latch with the Cross-Cradle Hold

Angela White, J.D., breastfeeding counselor — Fri, 17 Oct 2008 00:57:03 +0000

In this video Dr. Jack Newman guides a woman in using the cross-cradle hold to latch her baby onto the breast. While there are many different breastfeeding positions, the cross-cradle hold can be particularly helpful for newborns. Note how the mother is not forcefully pushing the baby’s head onto the breast, but rather is simply supporting the head and bringing the baby tummy-to-tummy and using her arm on the baby’s back and hand under the baby’s face. This position also allows for breast compressions (using the mother’s thumb on top of the breast and four fingers underneath the breast to compress the breast when baby is just “nibbling” and not actively sucking and swallowing large mouthfuls).

Post from: Breastfeeding 1-2-3

Breast Milk Clears a Stuffy Nose

Angela White, J.D., breastfeeding counselor — Sat, 27 Sep 2008 22:51:52 +0000

It was bound to happen eventually. We made it all the way to the third week of school before my first grader and preschooler brought home the first colds of the season. I reminded my preschooler not to kiss or touch the baby (if anything she gives her a little too much love) but I knew we were history when she accidentally sneezed on Nicole.

At 10 weeks, Nicole is weathering the cold just fine. She’s generally as happy as ever, and she quite enjoys the sneezes! *sneeze* *coo*! The only time she gets upset is when she wants to nurse but she can’t breathe through her nose. The situation got quite desperate when I’d pulled over the car and stopped in a parking lot to nurse. It was 99 degrees Fahrenheit (so much for fall!) on the blacktop and I was alternately trying to nurse her and soothe her by walking around. It was an exercise in frustration for both of us, until I remembered the tip Sinead mentioned on this post about breast milk curing pink eye. She said breast milk can help clear a stuffy nose, much like saline nose drops. I tried it and it worked like a charm! Nicole nursed herself to sleep, I popped her back in her car seat, and we drove on our merry way!

Post from: Breastfeeding 1-2-3

Wordless Wednesday: Skin to Skin

Angela White, J.D., breastfeeding counselor — Wed, 17 Sep 2008 18:06:53 +0000

Photo credit: Mike Hanlon

Post from: Breastfeeding 1-2-3

Any Dream Analysts Out There?

Angela White, J.D., breastfeeding counselor — Tue, 16 Sep 2008 21:53:34 +0000

I have had two dreams — nightmares — that Nicole turned out not to be mine. The first dream happened when she was six weeks old. In the dream, my husband and I were staying at a hotel. There was a knock on the door, and in walked one of my old neighbors from Michigan. He had come to pick the baby up. “Thanks for watching her!” he said, and walked out the door with her. I was positively heartbroken to realize that I had only been babysitting and I had fallen so in love with her that I had convinced myself she was mine.

In the second dream, I realized that when I went to work each day (which is bizarre because I do not work outside the home in my waking life), the baby went to her “real” mother in prison. I was the wet nurse that took care of the baby at night when she wasn’t allowed to visit her mother in prison. I had to decide whether I wanted to continue being a wet nurse in spite of the risk of disease transmission. Again I was broken-hearted that Nicole wasn’t mine.

At first I thought the dreams were simply affirming my love for Nicole. Now I wonder whether they are about my subconsciously feeling inadequate as a mother. “Maybe I’ll be found out as a fraud and someone will come take her away from me!” I don’t feel that way during the day. I enjoy her a lot and she is an easy baby. If anything I worry about giving my older girls enough attention and reassurance during this time of change in our family. So I am not sure why I am dreaming these dreams. I certainly plan before I go to bed to tell myself not to dream those dreams anymore!

Have you had similar dreams? Any thoughts on the interpretation?

Post from: Breastfeeding 1-2-3

Mom on the Go

Angela White, J.D., breastfeeding counselor — Wed, 03 Sep 2008 17:37:43 +0000

Nicole is almost seven weeks old now and I’ve already breastfed her:

~ at the midwife’s and doctor’s offices
~ a wedding
~ a pool party
~ a La Leche League meeting (of course!)
~ in various parking lots
~ at the grocery store
~ while house hunting
~ and yesterday at the first PTA meeting of the school year.

For me, it is convenient to be breastfeeding. It means I can go anywhere, anytime, without having to think about whether I have enough supplies for the trip (as long as my purse is packed with enough diapers). And the best part is my baby is content in all of those new places! When I went to the pool party, everyone complimented me on what a “good baby” Nicole is. All babies are “good” — but Nicole was quiet and contented because I breastfed her whenever she needed it.

Post from: Breastfeeding 1-2-3

Poll Results: Nursing in Public

Angela White, J.D., breastfeeding counselor — Fri, 15 Aug 2008 22:43:23 +0000

Nearly 200 voters expressed their opinions on the age, if any, that breastfeeding in public becomes in appropriate. I was glad to see that 35% of voters felt that nursing in public is always appropriate. I was surprised to see 6% of voters say it’s never appropriate. The overall breakdown:

Vote in the new poll in the side bar!

Post from: Breastfeeding 1-2-3

Breastfeeding Observations of a Six-Year-Old

Angela White, J.D., breastfeeding counselor — Sun, 10 Aug 2008 14:55:56 +0000

When my newborn was two days old, my six-year-old came to sit next to me on the bed and asked conversationally, “Is baby nursing well? Does she like it? She’s a funny baby. At first she won’t latch on and then you have to get her on and then she nurses and likes it.” Post from: Breastfeeding 1-2-3

Post from: Breastfeeding 1-2-3

Tips for Nursing a Newborn in Public

Angela White, J.D., breastfeeding counselor — Sun, 10 Aug 2008 02:02:37 +0000

My newborn and I had our first “official” outing (other than to the offices of the pediatrician or midwife) on the day she turned three weeks old. We attended the community talent show at the local library, which I was pleased to see had a huge display of breastfeeding information (see above) in honor of World Breastfeeding Week! The talent show was so great. There is nothing cuter than: a 3-year-old belting out How Great Is Our God, a 4-year-old barely whispering the ABCs, another 4-year-old humming the Indiana Jones theme song, and a darling girl tap dancing on industrial carpeting in the library rec room! My own 6-year-old did an abridged reading of the book Chrysanthemum. I could not have been prouder and I wouldn’t have missed it for anything! It did take a lot of coordination for me to get there with a newborn though, and it made me think of some tips for nursing a newborn in public.

1. Watch your baby’s cues (rooting, fist in mouth, any fussing) and feed her before she starts to cry. It’s a lot harder to nurse inconspicuously when you’re trying to latch on a wailing newborn!

2. Consider whether you will be more comfortable using nursing clothing or regular clothing. Sometimes for me it’s easier to hike up a regular shirt than it is to fiddle with a nursing shirt. However, at a formal event (like the wedding ceremony I attended briefly yesterday) it is lovely to have a nursing dress rather than having to wear a two-piece outfit or excuse oneself to a private location to hike up a dress!

3. Along the same lines, consider whether using a nursing cover of some sort makes it more difficult or easier to nurse. If you are uncomfortable nursing in public without a cover, then by all means use one, but personally I find it very hard to maneuver a cover over me and the baby and still be able to see to latch the baby on. Plus it’s just too darn hot in the summer in California to use a cover. My motto: do what works for you!

4. Ignore everyone around you! The more you fret over who might be watching and what people might be thinking, the harder it will be to give your baby the attention she needs.

5. It does not bother me to see any level of exposure of a mother’s breast or nipple during a nursing session. I don’t even like to bring up the word “discreet.” What I will say is that the vast majority of nursing mothers do want to be considerate of others around them, and do wish to maintain as much modesty as possible when nursing in public. Having said all that, remember that you are likely much more covered than you think you are when you are nursing in public. I cannot count the number of times people have thought my baby was sleeping in my arms rather than nursing. Granted it’s not easy to get a newborn latched on, but it gets easier and easier (until you’ve got a wiggly toddler and that’s a whole other issue!)

Post from: Breastfeeding 1-2-3