It is so hard to tell why she wakes up. It could certainly be night terrors or something, but then she’ll fart and be alright, or burp, or teething drops will work and she’ll calm down and go back to sleep. It’s hard to know if everything in the middle of the night is due to a medical problem (she’s perfectly happy and healthy during the day–not now, with her cold, but most of the time). I just don’t know.

Last night we had somewhat of a break through, though it was rough. She was nursing to fall asleep, but her nose was too stuffy for her to do it for as long as she needed (even with me using the ‘booger snarfer”) and she became somewhat frustrated. She was really tired, upset and unwilling to be consoled in any other way besides the breast, so I left it open as an option. I rubbed her back, sang her night-night songs over and over, patted her bottom, and tried to remain calm as she worked through her frustration and get herself to sleep some other way. She did it. After wiggling all around to find the perfect spot, and crying a lot, she finally cozied up next to my leg and let me rub her back to sleep. It was not exactly a pleasant experience for us since she was so very upset, but she did it. Each time thereafter at night, I nursed her for just a short bit (a sip of water kind of nursing session), and then I laid her down still a bit awake, but calm and she’d fall right back to sleep.

Transitions seem to come at points when I feel that I can go no further with a particular situation.

The “moo, moo” is pretty funny . It sounds like a childrens’ book title, “Daddies that Moo.” Mine woke up one night, sat up in her bed and babbled something that sounded like “oct-a-pus” very clearly and seriously and then laid down and fell asleep again. Octopus. Sure, alright, why not?

My daughter has nightmares and night terrors on occasion. I wonder if this may be what the crying is about in Jennifer L’s case, sometimes? When my daughter has a nightmare/terror, she is completely inconsolable for 20-30 minutes. She had one the other night, and it broke my heart. She woke up again, still inconsolable, later in the night. Then she woke for a third time, this time, just stood up and played and jumped in her crib. I think by then the terror had passed and she just did her normal thing.

My daughter is also a late teether, and did wake up at night on occasion when teething. However, she usually was not fussy or upset. She just plays. I do have to make her lay down and try to go back to sleep, or she would be up for hours playing. I can’t sleep thru her jumping around, although my husband usually has no problem.

Funny story, the other night (the night terror night on the third waking) I went in to try to get her back to sleep, and she heard my husband snoring- she looked at me and said “Moo, Moo!” She thought my husband was making cow noises!

Lately though, she just wakes up crying and she cannot put herself back to sleep and I am not inclined to test how long she can go in the middle of the night before I decide whether or not to intervene. If I try to rub/pat her back, she just continues to cry and tries to climb in to my lap. If I hold her, she frantically makes her way to her source of all security–the milk supply. She is definitely persistent.

Just now, she woke up after only 30 minutes of being in bed. My husband and I still don’t have a good answer for these kinds of wake-ups since it’s been so long since we’ve dealt with them. She was so sad. I gave her a couple of minutes to see if she would calm herself and go back to sleep, but she just started crying and waking herself up even more. Then I go to her and after only three minutes or so of being awake and sad, it’s too difficult to console her without the breast because she’ll just keep crying even with us there. We gave her teething drops and nursed her back to sleep. If I had run up there right when I heard her, it would have been a 10 minute expedition and the calming after a “little cry” took about 30 and was more frazzling for all of us.

Another problem we have (more during the day) bis that we moved her straight to a platform futon next to our bed (our bed is fairly low already), so if she wakes up, she can move. Her sleep sack prevents her from crawling back in bed with us, but she sometimes wanders off her bed a bit. Our room is child-friendly, so that’s not a problem, it’s just that she doesn’t quite have the sense of bed space yet to put herself back to sleep in her bed. I’ve read of others who moved their toddlers straight from their bed to a toddler bed with success.

Hopefully she’ll stay asleep tonight for a bit longer. We’re in the process of making a sleep plan for when she gets over this cold. Your ideas are great! Thanks!

http://www.sweet-juniper.com/2005/09/sleep-wars-round-one.html

It’s exactly how I relate to all of the baby sleep books/advice out there. I definitely don’t let her cry when it comes to bedtime/night waking stuff and I feel that in some ways she is happier during the day for it.

It does get easier. If any newer mommies are reading this blog and wondering if meeting the night time needs gets easier–it certainly does. My daughter used to take what seemed like forever to fall asleep and now the night time and nap time rituals are short and straight to the point. She nurses, falls asleep and I go about my day (except in this two steps backwards month where I only get to go about the day for a shorter bit of time–but it’s definitely better than before! ). She also rolls away from me when she is done nursing, which I feared would never happen (this is where supportive friends and family come in handy to give you the raised eyebrow, “Never?” look. On good days I can convince myself that she’s not going to be nursing her way into kindergarten and then on to college.

Oops, up from the nap already…Time to go lay down with her. She’ll only be this small for such a short time. Someday we’ll all hear, “Mommy, leave me alone, I am trying to sleep!”

The few things that are hard to hear are about how well my husband and I slept when we were young. We were formula fed, put in cribs and slept peacefully in rooms next to our parents’ rooms. It worked out great. We were also fairly mellow, easy going kids. Both sides of our families assure us that it’s something we’re doing to her (not putting her in her own room, not crying-it-out, letting her *manipulate* us (that one really gets me hair up!, etc…).

Despite night wakings, she is generally well-rested and happy during the day. Fortunately, they can’t find fault with our day-time child-rearing. She doesn’t melt down or get fussy; she plays independently for long periods of time; she eats well; she is self-initiating potty training with enthusiasm and zeal. My husband is probably right that like all other things she is learning, she’ll eventually learn to put herself back to sleep.

Things do need to change though. For her sake, I think we’re going to try changing the bedtime routine to have nursing come earlier. She’s 15 months today and I am finally feeling certain that she doesn’t *need* milk all night long! It’s amazing how fast they grow and change.

Kelley, I also do not allow any “wait and see” — I can’t tolerate the crying and my heart tells me to go to my daughter. Attempts to cry it out often result in far more than 5 minutes of crying, and can even lead to the child vomiting from being so upset. I’ve read too many stories of moms who regret attempts to CIO.

I also do not believe the statistics mentioned about night-waking. Parents think they’re the only ones who have babies who wake in the night, and they are shy to say so.

I would say at your baby’s age that you should give her a good few minutes before you go in to comfort her, and she might take that time to console herself to sleep.

My opinion is that there’s a reason for the crying, and soothing her is never the wrong idea. I don’t allow even 5 minutes of “wait and see.” She needs contact she gets contact, it’s really all about attachment, and feeling safe. Is your daughter sleeping enough with her naps and bed times?

Again, I think you have to use instinct about the crying. See how much the night weening hanges things and go from there.