Tips for When Your Baby Resists Solid Food
May 22, 2009 by Angela White, J.D., breastfeeding counselor
Filed under books, how to, mothering, nutrition
So far in this three-part series I have offered ten tips for helping your baby enjoy solid food. In this last installment, I make some suggestions for what to do when your baby resists eating solids.
Helping my baby feed herself some yogurt
Five More Tips for Helping Your Baby with Solid Food Feedings
11. Don’t starve the baby of breast milk in the hope of encouraging solid food intake. I hope that sentence speaks for itself, but in case not, let me explain what I mean. Don’t give in to the unhelpful suggestion or thought that you are feeding the baby too much breast milk and that is the reason the baby shows little interest in solids. People who think that are misguided on a few levels: (1) it’s nearly impossible to feed a baby too much breast milk (you cannot force a baby to nurse when the baby is not interested, and babies self-regulate at the breast whereas milk from a bottle flows freely and it is harder for a bottle-fed baby to control the amount consumed), (2) depriving the baby of milk does not encourage solids but does encourage a cranky, potentially malnourished baby, and (3) there is no rush to get the baby to eat much solid food because breast milk provides the bulk of nutrition through the first year (and in fact some babies thrive on breast milk alone — see the comments section for more discussion on that assertion).
A baby who is resisting solid foods simply might not be ready for any number of reasons. Maybe the gag reflex has not completely gone away. Perhaps your baby is teething or ill and needs some time off from or a delay in starting solids. It’s even possible that your baby knows what is best. I have heard anecdotes about babies who resisted solid food or certain foods in particular and those babies turned out to have one or more food allergies. If you suspect a food allergy, read “A” Is for Allergy Prevention and Reduction.
12. Offer a choice. As I’ve said before, I believe most food issues are about control. If you limit food choices and try to force your baby to eat a particular food, that can backfire to the point that your child severely limits the foods he or she will eat. Give your baby the control by offering a choice at any given meal. “Squash or applesauce?” “Pears or kiwi or both?” Even a six-month-old can indicate a preference for food through facial expressions, sounds, or grabbing for a particular food. The idea is not to prepare two separate meals or to waste food, but to show the baby what’s on offer and to provide the food the baby will actually eat!
Of course, the choice is not “veggies or fast food chicken nuggets.” All of the options you offer should be nutritious. This will become more and more important as the baby becomes older. At my house, a child can choose whether to eat any or all of the fruit, vegetable, grain, and/or meat offered at that particular meal. If the child chooses not to eat any of the items on offer (this has happened two or three times with my four-year-old), then she gets to wait until I finish my meal before I will prepare one other healthful option (usually something unexciting like whole grain cereal and milk). I look at my child’s nutrition over the course of a week and do not worry about any isolated meal.
13. Ease up if it is not going well. Hindsight will often reveal why a baby was refusing a particular food or solids in general. Let your baby rely on the nutrition from breast milk as you slow down the process. Your baby will sense if you become tense or anxious about food. Don’t let your anxiety become contagious! The goal is for your baby to enjoy solid food, not any particular amount of food or any one certain food. Success breeds success, and a baby who has a good experience at meal time will look forward to the next meal. A child who refuses vegetables at one meal just might eat them at the next, and in the end the child quite possibly will eat better if you do not engage in a battle of wills over a certain food. It all comes back to the issue of control.
14. Invite over a peer. If your older baby still does not show much interest in solids or does not eat many different types of food, it can be very helpful to invite over a little friend you know is a good eater! Go on a picnic or have a play date. Talk to the other parent in advance about serving a food the other child will readily eat. When your child sees the other child eating that food, your child might very well want some too!
15. Read up on the subject. If you missed parts one and two of this series, see 5 Tips for Helping Your Baby Enjoy Solid Food and More Tips for Your Baby and Solid Food. If your baby is just starting solid food, check out Starting Your Baby on Solid Foods: When, What and How. For more detailed reading, you might enjoy the following books:
Super Baby Food
Child of Mine: Feeding with Love and Good Sense
My Child Won’t Eat!: How to Prevent and Solve the Problem
What are your thoughts? Do you agree or disagree with my tips? Have you read any of the books I mentioned? Do you have any other books you recommend?
Thanks for reminding me to relax, Angela! I have a little one who loves to eat solids but gets constipated really easily. Perhaps instead of trying to “encourage” high fiber foods into her she’s not too fond of yet, I should try encouraging something else into her instead!
My favourite book, by far, is “My Child Won’t Eat!” by Carlos Gonzalez, published by La Leche League. I recommend it to everyone, all the time. It totally put my fears at ease, and helped me relax and enjoy eating with my kid instead of turning it into a battle. It’s amazing!
Is there a Colorado law that explicitly states that it is a mother’s legal right to breastfeed? The father of my daughter’s baby (7-months), and his attorney, are trying to force my daughter to wean the child and get her to bottle feed. This is so the father can gain more freedom with visitations. Any suggestions on where I can find this information for my daughter to fight this issue? Thanks in advance for your response.
Hi Ron,
I have written a detailed answer to your question here:
http://www.blisstree.com/breastfeeding123/breastfeeding-divorce-and-custody-issues/
I hope that helps! If you get a chance, please let me know how the case turns out. I am rooting for your daughter and her baby.
http://www.who.int/nutrition/publications/infantfeeding/WHO_NHD_00.1/en/index.html – see page 10 + 11
Breastmilk does not provide complete nutrition for the second six months of life. I am all for full term breastfeeding (I am still feeding my 18 month old), but I think it is fair to point out that the energy gap between what a baby needs and what breastmilk can provide gets wider from about 6 months.
There are other important nutrients which are also needed – iron stores from birth run out at around six months, so it’s important for babies to get some iron from other foods.
While I think that many doctors are ill informed and try to bully us into pushing solids before the baby is really ready, it’s important for parents to be informed of the facts, so they can make an informed decision.
In general I agree that it’s a good idea to start solids around 6 months of age and I certainly believe every mother should do her own research and consult a doctor for medical advice.
When a baby resists solid food and/or has a family history of allergies or shows signs of severe and numerous food allergies, some mothers choose to rely on breast milk for the baby’s sole (if not “complete”) source of nutrition. Kellymom.com says: “Some babies are exclusively breastfed for a year (and occasionally up to two years) with no problems at all. In addition, some doctors recommend that babies with a high risk for allergies be exclusively breastfed for a year.” http://www.kellymom.com/nutrition/vitamins/iron.html
Kellymom also notes: “The current research indicates that a baby’s iron stores should last between six and twelve months, depending upon the baby.” Your comment implies that there is no iron in breast milk, although perhaps that is not what you intended. The good news on iron is that “up to 50% of the iron in human milk can be absorbed by the infant, as compared to 10% in cow’s milk, and 4% in iron-fortified formulas.” (LLL fact list). Some (many?) babies might need an additional source of iron (from solid food or vitamin supplements) at some point after 6 months, but not all babies will.
The points I hope to make are that parents need not worry quite as much as some seem to about getting solids into a baby, that breast milk continues to provide the bulk of nutrition, that it’s not always a good idea to push solid food when the baby resists or has allergies, and that there is anecdotal evidence (and perhaps more) that some babies thrive on breast milk alone for up to one year and even beyond.
Yup – I quite agree – I was just concerned that some mums might read “breastmilk supplies complete nutrition” and think that family foods are not important. It is very easy to get the wrong idea from a cursory reading