How to Get Over a Broken Heart
August 16, 2007 by Sara Ost
Filed under Boys & Girls, How To, Misc., Philosophy, Relationships, Stress
It doesn’t take a genius to ascertain that I keep a smart-ass establishment (drugs and horoscopes much?). But we all know that underneath the big, bad edge, smart-asses are really the most tender nibblins of all. So here’s a little love for everyone who has the courage to live, but most especially a couple of my bruised peeps – you know who you are. For everyone else, don’t worry – we’ll get back to the sardonic escapades in two shakes of Molly McButter.
Broken heart? Rejection? Failure? It hurts (and hurts, and hurts).
Here’s how to properly lick your wounds:
1. Take heart: you will not die.
Even though it really, really feels like it. Even though you can feel your heart physically swelling in your chest and pain pulsing through your entire body and your ribs are sticking to your sides like macaroni on a microwave – you will not die from this. It might mess up your mental and physical health a little in the short term (you’re allowed to eat some carbs, for Pete’s sake). But you will not die. It still hurts, though.
2. At least it’s a good hurt.
Vera Pavlova wrote:
“If there is something to desire,
there will be something to regret.
If there is something to regret,
there will be something to recall.
If there is something to recall,
there was nothing to regret.
If there was nothing to regret,
there was nothing to desire.”
3. Give yourself as much time as you need.
A lot of the angst of moving on comes from self-judgments about when and how and why you should move on and what you did wrong. Don’t compare yourself to others. You’re not nuts; you’re not strange; you’re not obsessed; you’re not a fool. Your big crime is innocence. The only sin you can possibly commit is doubting yourself. You’re just human and you felt something. At the time, whenever that was, it felt right. Accept that your feelings are your feelings and let them be (to paraphrase Marcus Aurelius). Feelings are hard to feel and even harder to understand. They’ll pass when the time is right and not a moment sooner.
4. Things simply are what they are.
And now they are different. They cannot be any other way. Life is a series of moments and all you really have to do in this life is accept them. No one expects anything more; and believe me, no one upstairs does, either. Sometimes those moments turn into chapters, but ultimately even the chapters conclude.
5. Treat yourself right.
Try to get out as much as you can (but don’t force yourself to jump into something new or go out partying every night). Talk to your friends, even if all you can squeak out is “it’s another rough one today”. Don’t worry about annoying them – even if you do, they are the ones who really know you and they will still love you. You can’t fool them anyway – even if you don’t say anything, they know.
6. Exercise.
A daily bout of exercise – walking, running, lifting weights, dancing, the elliptical, yoga – will help your brain both regulate and release your feel-good hormones. A bonded relationship causes your brain to release oxytocin, a powerful “commitment” peptide. When it goes away you can become depressed. So let those other helpful hormones fill in the void. Exercise!
7. Eat a lot of fat.
Beneficial fatty acids in things like olive oil, nuts, avocados and salmon will baby your brain and help keep your mood stable. Eat some at every meal from here on out.
8. Spoil yourself (but not too much).
Buy your favorite beer, enjoy an entire pint of ice cream. But don’t go overboard – you’ll just end up feeling worse. There’s no hard-and-fast rule for when you’re about to cross the line. I think you’ll know your limit if you listen to your instincts. In fact, I believe our instincts will never, ever let us down, if only we would pay them heed. (And remember, if you cross your line, that’s okay. Mistakes are not bad, they are learning, and that is what life is all about, right?)
9. This too shall pass.
I know – I know – it doesn’t feel that way right now, but the pain will pass. Reality bites and life will give your heart a ruthless pruning, but you’ll grow back even fuller. You might miss a season or two – no worries, so did the damaged peach tree I watched my grandmother coax for 10 patient years. The fruit it finally bore was the best slice of sweet imaginable. That memory has always comforted me; find one that comforts you.
10. Now is not the time to begin training for a marathon, overhauling your investments, or perfecting your GTD system.
Initial small accomplishments can give you a bump, but if you’re using them to avoid feeling the hurt, that hurt will just come back with a wallop (I don’t know about you but I’m an expert at this one). Do make positive changes and invest yourself in projects that are both distracting and productive, because these things will help you move on with greater confidence. I’m glad I read my RSS feeds today, because one of my favorite bloggers posted this positive guide to dealing with setbacks. But just remember that as you take positive actions, don’t try to repress those feelings. Feelings always come out eventually.
Although, when they do…that’s good, too. Have a good, long lick and remember: everybody plans picnics in the park. Everybody carries a private hurt (or hundred). Good for you for feeling something and taking a risk. That’s called living and all we can do is our best in each moment. There is no right or wrong; there is no should. There is only real.
You might feel sad and hurt, but guess what?
I think you fucking rock.
I’m just a twentysomethin’ blogger and I don’t have the answers, but I do know that.
Hello,so i want to thank whoever wrote those tips on how to get over a broken heart. I have never told my story of heartbreak cuz i am afraid. but i am dont being scared so here it goes.I am girl who fell in love with a girl. I never been attracted to the opposite sex but it just happened. We kept our love a secret for 2 and a half years. Nobody knew that we were together, no one. She was my first love and i was hers too. I do not understand how we went that long with hiding our love, but we did. We were crazy in love and we broke up about 2 or three months ago. I cant even remember, but the pain I can. The relationship was so unhealthy cuz we kept everything a secret. When i wanted to talk to her about something i couldnt cuz friends were around..we could never show affection like we wanted to, we lied consistenly, it was just bad and turned really unhealthy. She also left me twice but like an idiot i came back to her. What sucks is that i know if we were in a normal relationship, we would probably be so happpy. I mean who does that for that long? I think that kind of love is so rare and we both gave up so much for eachother and went through soo much just to have moments together. My heart is healing, but there are those nights where i am just heartbroken. I still love her with all my heart but she does not appreciate or want me in her life right now. I really don’t want her in mine either because it is just too much pain. But i try to keep myself busy and recently am talking to a guy who just is very sweet. I just cant fully let go, and i want to sooo bad. How do i know when i fully just let go..i am scared. Will i ever get over this?
I fell in love with a girl too, my best friend. and she loved me too or so she said, things didn’t work out wityh us either because she couldnt take that i was a girl. Our secret didn’t really stay secret so it didn’t last long. The last time we were together was january and now i barely see her, i know she sleeps around now though and it breaks my heart all the time. I think the only way to get over it is to cut them off slowly. I wish i knew if i’d ever get over it, but at least you aint alone x
you know what you are?
an absolute star.
boyfriend and best friend of 9 months broke up with me, and told me he no longer loves me or has feelings for me , and has very much ‘moved on’ to other girls about 20 seconds after we broke up.
i have cried a river , been histerical , thrown up and not slept.
but i no longer have the energy for him anymore. yes i will most probably cry again , but from now on..i do not need him.
dats so horrible i hope u feel betta. but i recently broke up wit my bf. well to tell u the truth i cant really consider it to b a bf b cuz we neva saw eachother not once in our lifes we jus look at pix talk on the fone and text but i truly loved him he was like the man i can tell everything to n not have to worry wat he would think of me. but my heart broke wen i called him 1 day n he didnt answer n dis went on for about 2 months everyday and i started to worry n stuff i would call n got nothing till 1 day i got to talk with him n i cried to him n he axed y i sounded sad but i lied n sed dat its tough around here wit my family n he told me to call him bac in bout n hour but after dat wen i called bac he neva picked up n yet im still waiting to hear his voice he was my everything though i went so many months callin him my bf n tellin him i love u n iv cried soo many times like wen he got shot words couldnt describe how i felt b cuz his bro nore sis picked up the fone n his fone was off so there was no conact the only way i found out was b cuz wen i texted him his sis texted bac saying he got shot dat was it but after bout 10 min i was bale to talk to him n find out he was ok but there was still lots of recovering to do then wen he had a athsma attck i cryed till he called n told me hes ok. but he once sed dat it wasnt love he jus had me sprung but till 2 day i still think he was wrong and it is love b cuz wen sum 1 has u sprung it doesnt feel good but hurt at the same time n it most definitly doesnt break ur heart to dis extence. but i dont exaturate wen i say dis n i truly mean dis from the bottom of my heart dat wen i told him i love u for the first time i really ment it.
I fell in love with a girl. I finally told her, and she told me back… 2 months later she broke up with me because her friends kept telling her we were to young.
We talked bout it and worked things out.
Six months went by… I was so in love with her. We couldn’t kiss, we couldn’t date, but it didn’t matter I hadn’t fallen in love with her because of physical things.
But one day she started ignoring me. Treating me different.
And then i hear from a friend that she sent emails out saying she was breaking up with me.
So i called her to ask about it.
The next thing i know her dad is breaking up 4 her on the phone.
I was finally able to talk to her in person about it and she told me she had just been going along with things ever since the last breakup 6 months earlier.
She told me she was going to meet a lot of “people” going to her new school.
I’ve never been the same person since then. I still love her and i always will. I just hate how much it hurts… To have someone say they love you and then tell you it was a lie is something else. It makes you feel worthless and unwanted. There’s still a part of me that dosn’t believe that she was just going a long with things. All my memories burn me inside. Every moment that i can remember cuts me open. 6 months of memories… lies. 2 1/2 years gone.
Hey there,
O know how you feel I met this awesome girl I promised myself not to fall in love as she was so young, she is an adult and she knows her mind she was keen as on mr and I did fall in love it was 2 weeks but THE best 2 weeks of my life it was intense we had plans to Christmas shop go to gigs and movie nights ,
Her damn father decided she cant see me she is 19 she is an adult goddamn it I can’t believe it happened I am totally gutted it , The whole moral aspect is bullshit, They let her half bro junkie live in the house her father is a drunk and he disapproves of an age difference in a man who is positive influence on her who care for his daughter who would never hurt her who his daughter obviously likes if not more than likes , life is so unfair.My heart is ripped apart because I have done NOTHING wrong and I am been punished for NOTHING other than been in love and caring
I am a 17 year old guy and those of you who say guys don’t cry are liars. I have cried my eyes out over a girl just a couple months ago. She was the 7th rejection in the past 3 years. I know I am not the best guy, but I wish someone would throw me a freaking bone. The only way to really cope with any sort of heartbreak I’d to just letting time take care of it. You can’t force a better feeling if you try. When you look at the girl/guy you really like it all comes rushing back to you, the bad feelings you wish would go away come back involuntarily. It’s mixed feelings of regret, jealousy, envy and every other feeling that makes you want to curl up in a corner. But trust me, as time goes on, you will eventually let go of that person, but you will always have a place where you keep thoughts of them. I have had a lot of tough luck, but it doesn’t mean I am going to give up. I am gonna keep on going, and everyone else should too. It hurts like crap, it feels like the air is getting sucked away from you, that the ground won’t stop shaking, your muscles feel weak and you can’t do anything except cry. But trust me, there are thousands of others, such as myself, that are going through the same heartbreak. Just keep your head up and keep pressing on and you will find that that will make it much easier…everything will be fine…
I can relate to what you are saying. my boyfriend cheated on me and lied to me about it. I had to ask him more then once then he was able to admit it. It was so sad becuase he was my first love and I was his. We have been together since high school and now wer in college almost graduating. I cried every night with disbelief that he betrayed me. We used to talked about our future and how we would raise our family but it was shattered when he lied. It was a very though time for me.I was trying to move on but he was begging me to stay. I couldnt bare to be with him but at the same time I could not let go of him. Every day for us was hell. We’d argue on the phone and brek our peronal belongings. Never have I felt so little and helpless in my entire life. With a heart thats broken, I find life too hard. Just driving down the street and I hear or smell somerthing that brings up a memory of him and I; I have to stop the car and cry for like ten striaght minutes then get back on the road. I dont regret loving with all my heart, I just regret loving him so much for him to betray me.
Im actually do9ing fine now. The pain and wound does gradually passes, but it leaves behind and ugly ugly scar..
but all I do is just try to live on day at a time, and live it the best way possible for myself and I.
hey guys.. i am guy who is hearbroken… i was with this gril from my work place and we started being freinds and talking about our first love… we both had a heart broken from our first love… after a while we became bestfreinds… than we started haveing feelings and go out and we were together… we got in a lot of fights…arguing…and break ups.. but we gave each other many chances… and she hurt me i hurt her, she made me cry i made her cry… but in the end i always cared for her… and i always loved her… like i had this moving on feelings between the break ups but than we used to get back again… but the last break we had was 2 months ago and i didnt contact her and she didnt eatiher and after that two months she wanted to see me cuz she wanted her itouch back that she got it for my birthday… and i was like so happy i thought she wanted to get back and she wanted to see me.. and me being a fool going there so happy and all and she takes the itouch and tells me not to fucking touch her… and that she has no feelings for me its all gone… i didnt tkae her seriously and i was like ok w/e and i we used to just talk on msn and fb and phone… after a week she tells me she is planing on going out with this guy at her workplace… the guy asked her out and with out thinking she said yes… she told me this all over msn and when i heard that… oh man i just freaked out… i just couldnt beliave it… she was like a goody good giel and a very sweet and nice… and all and so inocent… and now she has cahnged so much… she doesnt care anymore.. she doesnt love me anymore… she has moved on and the old her is dead and gone… and i went to her house being a stalker and cryed in front of her and begged her not to go out with anyone and please take me back i am sorry for all the mistakes i have done… but she looks at me and loughs and tells me to stop this and fucking accept it and deal with it… she says she is done with it with me with everything…
when i heard everything and all all those harsh words that she said that i couldnt even expect her saying things like that… it just broke my heart… i went home and cryed for like 3 hours… i am guy.. 19 years old.. i hate myslef for how i feel… feel petatic and low and foolish but i cant help it… the pain is too much to handle.. and its killing me… its hurting more than anything…
i dont how long is this gonna last… i dont know to get over her… i dont know how to deal with her going out with other guys that just ask her out and she says yes right away with out thinking… i dont know what to do… i hate everything at this time of my life… i dont feel like doing anything… i dont feel like going to wrok… i dont feel like hanging out with my freinds.. i dont feel like going home… i just wana dessapear and go some where and cry…cry as much as i can and leav all the pain and hurt feelings there and come back…i dont know how to deal with all this…
i know there are many tips like this for heartbroken people but do they really help? will this pain go away…? will this feelings go away and will i ever smile again and be happy ? will i ever move on…?
right now to me it seem imposable…
why is world like this? why do people change… i am still the same… i still have the same feelings…
sorry guys for my long sad story… just need to let it out and share it with someone…
Oh my god I am crying right now. After reading your story and how you feel I started crying because thats exactly how I feel and look at it. It hurts so bad and you love them so much, but they don’t love you and they tell you that you’re changing and that you’re not the love of there life like they used to think you was. And then I read her letters and it just doesnt make sense. I mean she loved me so much and said how she would never leave me for anyone because I’m the perfect guy for her and she’ll always be there for me and she’ll never hurt me. and now I look and I’m hurt all the time by her and she left me for someone else and doesnt want anything to do with me and doesnt love me anymore. I would type my story, but I just dont want to remind myself of all the good and bad times i had with her and I dont want to get super upset again because I’m still recovering. Just remember though man you are not alone. Good luck I hope you’ll get along ok.
First of all, THANK YOU for posting this blog!
So, here’s my story… Hopefully writing about it will help. Going through day five now after my girl left. We were together 2 ½ years and started out as great friends who worked together. We never really pursued anything romantically as I was married and committed. But, as distance between my wife and I grew, closeness between her and I increased. I ultimately left my wife. No, not just to be with the one that has since broken my heart but for a gambit of other reasons for another blog. Anyway, my coworker, my friend, turned into my love and we quickly pursued a relationship.
We had our good times and bad times just like every other couple. But then, a VERY noticeable distance came between us. We had always talked through our issues (something my wife and I were horrible at) but this time, it was like an elephant in the room. Turns out, because I wasn’t there and willing/able to listen, she had started talking to someone else. And, just like the heartbreak I caused my ex-wife, she now causes me. I’m living the pain! Damn Karma!!
Is there something wrong with me? Why can’t I express these feelings when it matters?? Why did I take here for granted? Why, Why, WHY???
I am going to share my breakup, hopefully it will help me get through it. Mine is a bit different. I was coming out of an emotionally abusive marriage, met a friend online, we became very close and fell in love. We lived very far apart, but we vid called and messaged daily. We shared struggles,celebrated together, encouraged each other, worked so hard at communicating and found this incredible peace together, something we both craved so much. But the distance between us, circumstances in life proved too much. We started out as friends and fell in love, but he stopped being in love. He saw the challenges, and they were valid and honest, and decided the timing just couldn’t work. He still loved me but he had fallen out of love with me. This person was the most gentle, kind, loving person I have ever known, my heart was healed. The last year has been the best in so many ways even though the divorce sucks and the kids have been through a lot and I went back to school. I never knew love could be like that, never felt so free, so supported, the better I got in life, the happier he was. We were looking to the future and felt hope. But things changed. I am coming up to meet him at christmas, we broke up last night. There was no fighting, no hatred or animosity, just gentleness, honesty, respect, as its always been. We still want to be friends, we still love each other, but it just can’t work. The only problem is that I am still in love. I made a choice to be vulnerable, to not hold anything back and he treated my heart with such care and love, such tenderness. I regret nothing, have no bad memories from our relationship. And now I just want the feelings of being in love to fade so I can enjoy our friendship again without them getting in the way of that. He is so understanding, but this was a first for us both, we don’t really know what to do. Under different circumstances it might have worked. We didn’t do anything to each other that made us break up, tis simply the timing and life not cooperating. So how do I make my heart stop yearning and missing the affection and love? How do I stop wanting what can’t be, knowing love and then having it not be anymore? We never really had a chance, had to make due with long distance love. But it was real, more real then anything I have felt before. I will love again, but will it ever measure up to what we had? I miss him so much, its hard to be in love with someone that no longer is in love with you. Especially when he is such a great person and is your best friend. I want him to be happy, to find love again, he wants the same for me. Right now though my heart aches and all I can think of is another morning without seeing his smile, another night not hearing his loving goodnight. I have been loved and got to love, fully and honestly and it was amazing. I wish it didn’t end.
I’ve read all the stories on this page and for some weird reason I though I was all alone out there… SO alone. My fiancee and I had the perfect life… we spent alot of time together and we were never able to NOT deal with an issue that came up! She was my up and I was her ground. About 3 months ago we combined our finances to get rid of debt and save to buy a house and go on vacation! Everything was landing in perfect sequence. Then a new guy starts at her work. They talk, and she likes him as a friend. I accept this because why should I be jealous….time comes for me to go to school for my 4th and final year as an apprentice auto service technician and I get a phone call in the first week I am in school. She tells me she slept with him and it didnt feel wrong to her. She dumps me over the phone and tells me she never really was in love with me…. and this is after 3 1/2 years of being together…. I am still in school now for another 5 weeks….the sad part is…I have noone here to help!
its good to know im not the only one who feels the way i do right now. broke up with someone ive been with for over a year. i know, not that long. but i realize maybe i wasnt in love with her but afraid of going back to the way my life was without her… it still hurts but its true time will heal this… and this too shall pass.
This is my story…
I was dating a day for 2 years and we got engaged..
I thought I found the man of my dreams – I met 2 days before he was going back home and a month later he moved back to where I was staying to be with me.. I was over the moon – finally my search ended…
Then in June we decided that we will go and live in his home country but due to my work I could only go beginning of next year. So in July he went without me so that he could start building a home for us and when I got there we would get married and start our life together.. It was an exciting time because we were our plans and dreams were coming into reality – I knew I would miss him but we were going to see each constantly through out our time apart by me going there to visit him and for his sisters wedding in December and him coming here for Christmas and New Years and my Birthday…
While we were apart we were constantly on the phone and things seemed to be all in place.. I decided to visit him in August for a few days so the apart time wouldn’t be too long.. See him in August then in December for his sister’s wedding and then the beginning of next when I would move there and we would get married…
2 days before I was meant to go visit him we spoke in the morning and all was good we were super excited then that very after he phoned me in a drunken state and broke up with me – stating that he was never meant to be in a relationship and that he never wanted to marry me he only ask me to marry him to make me happy.. He also said that he will never be in a relationship again…. I asked if there is another girl and he said no but that he was interested in other girls and couldn’t promise to be faithful to me… OH MY WORD!!! my heart is beating at 50 million beats as I write this….
After this he hung up on me and tried to hold of him a few times that evening but he didn’t answer and eventually switched off the phone… A few weeks later I found out that he wanted to send me an sms to break up with me… Damn – am I worth so little that he could do that and be fine with it??? I treated him like gold… The past 2 1/2 months have been a nightmare and I have been so close to ending my life but can never do it… I am constantly depressed, sad, hurt, heartbroken and feeling worthless… To top it all off I found out a week ago that he met a girl while he was living with me and when he went back home they got together while we were still together and now he is a relationship with her – remember be said he would never be in another relationship!!! What do I do??? I am on super strong ant-depressants but they don’t seem to help because everyday I cry myself to sleep that only usually last 2 – 3 hours… I go out with my friends as much as I can and still go home feeling useless and worth nothing…
Hopefully one day the sun will start shining again…. I imagine him coming back to me but if did would I want him back for him to hurt me like this again… The pain is super bad like millions of knives constantly going in and out of your heart
hey, reading this website gave me some comfort to no their was alot of people in the same pain i am, iv bin with my boyfriend for almost 2years now and to be honest i was way to young to settle down and still am now i met him when i was 15 and im now nearly 17, ino everyone says “aww you cant fall in love that young” but i say bolox to that i no im in love becuase i pysicaly feel like i cant live without him and when we broke up only a week ago i havent left my house since i find my self stayin in and watching romantic films over and over again, my eating habbits have gone of the scales and iv put on 5pounds already everything i do reminds me of him and sumdays i feel so low i wish i jus wouldnt wake up… my friends and family are worried about me becuase im slowley sinking into a deep depression and i cant snap out of it,but the thing that makes things worse is i no im not the one in the ronge my x is hes the one who treated me bad hes the one who didnt appreciate what i have to offer which is such a shame becuase he never used to be like it, he was perfect for me shy, kind, loving, and most important he was different to everyone else i new, unique you could say and i fell head over heals inlove with him and stil am now, but as time went past he changed he made new friends that twisted him turned him into the arragant vain cocky selfish monster who i hardly recognise anymore… he really doesnt understand how much hes hurt me and i cant handle anymore of his lie’s and decetfulness but i still cant help the fact i love him and i still cant seem to find it in me to resist !!! hes treated me like a door mat for almost 8months now and during that hes apparntly cheated 11times when i sit here and think of it i cant even believe i put my self through it all 11 girls thats terrible i was basically askin for the heartbreak but evan as i remember every single last things hes said or done to hurt me id still go back to him if he asked and thats what im scared of most, i just wanna live my life and enjoy being young but i cant my heart feels like its slowly stoping and i find my self gaggin for air when i think about it for to long the pain is herendus and i dont feel like the same person anymore and having to see him everywere i go doesnt help the matter, i feel like giving up completley and just staying in my room till im over it but ino that wont help me. i need some advice i jus wanna be a happy teenager again i have my hole life ahead of me but this one boy this one relationship is stopin me from even getin out of bed. please help x
My Stefan
He had a crooked smile
that revealed everything
he had an exquisite kiss
that sent me reeling
it was like an explosion
when we came together
but he held back from me
to hurt me
all he could do
was hurt me
so all I could do
was leave.
so i was friends with this girl. i liked her and she liked me but i had a crazy suicidal ex i had to deal with. i stopped talking to the girl i liked because i didnt see a relationship possible with all the drama in my life.
Wow this website has shown me a few things. Strange how you can take solace in other peoples’ misery … guess it’s nice to know you’re not alone. This sucks. So i’m with her for a year, ended? 3 weeks ago. She was in college in my home town, she’s from 400 miles away, and all went well, yeah we argued from time to time, she was so insecure but the most beautiful girl in the world, how does that work, but she loved me so much. I grew complacent maybe, and even started to push away a little because I felt a little stifled by the constant need for reassurances. She was so jealous but I don’t know why. I’ve always felt i need to travel, and told her so, she took that to mean I was planning to leave her. and basically she wanted to get married and I didn’t feel ready. Didn’t know what I had I guess. (I’m 33 she’s 28)
Anyway 3 months ago we had a blazing row I said it’s over, she walked out of her job and moved back home 2 days later.
We made up within a week, she’s been up here and I’ve been down there since, but her insecurities have multiplied since the distance was factored in. Ringing me 18 times a night sometimes, accusing me of being unfaithful, which I never have. I tried to reassure her, but at the same time started growing tired..stopped seeing her as my beautiful girl started to feel resentment towards her..instead of just reassuring her. She became a figure I tried to hide from, because I felt hard done by. (now I’m thinking god Tom you’re so selfish and egotistic)
3 weeks ago after one really big row when I’d been out one night, and she’d accused me of some big things, I told her it’s over, can’t handle the distance, this constant accusing, this STRIFE basically. She was heartbroken to the point I can’t bear the suffering I caused. can’t sleep for it. this was Fri, come Sun I texted her did we do the right thing. She said yes, quoting all my reasons. We’re living seperate lives. She felt relieved that I was out of her life, and she’s happier now..that’s what hurts the most. She said I never show my feelings anyway, she’s sick of waiting. So I tell her I’ll move down there tomorrow, she says she’s confused, give her a few weeks. 2 weeks pass, hardest ever, i text her just to say I miss you like crazy, no pressure, how are you? she said sorry Tom. I sent all her stuff down with a letter, that letter was so sincere, no pressure but just that you are the one, (like she said I was to her) she texted saying thanks, sorry it has to be like this, x. (why the x!)
That was Thurs it’s now Sun. No contact. I’m literally winded and have been since that time 3 weeks ago. Can’t sleep, off work for a week. like a zombie.Drinking too much but that’s stopping now. Has to. Makes you worse.
Right that’s the ramble over. Basically the point is if there are any guys reading this then don’t always think there’s someone better out there. that’s what i did when the going gets tough. I didn’t think. Thought I can find someone else who won’t give me grief but in reality .. I caused it myself.Look at what you’ve got. Nobody’s perfect. It’s soooo true, you don’t know what you’ve got til it’s gone. Hard when you’ve been used to talking to someone 3 times a day. She said she loves me but it’s not enough to make it work. When I said I loved her she said she’s been waiting a year to hear that. why was i so emotionally retarded I never said?
Some people say forget her, some say if you really love her then drive down there and get her. Don’t know what to do. Some say no contact, others say if she’s the one you want … go get her. Don’t want to push her away though. 3 weeks ago she loved me – that can’t change so quick can it..? please no..what do I do? Give her time to miss me? ( we were so good together and she said that herself 2wks ago) or just lay it on the line and try get her back? don’t want to make her defensive but there’s conflicting advice. All I want is her. She is my babe and always will be, but I guess if she says she’s happier then I have to respect that. or is she just saying it. If you love somebody you have to let them go .. easier said than done! Any advice/thoughts would be much appreciated. Thank you. Tom
for girls love is just a game all they do is steal ur heart play with it as much as the can and when time comes the just let u go lik they never carried about u. why is it always u trust a girl and at the end the just let u go. i broke up with my gf last night cant sleep she is just in my mind since last i saw her. but i know right now she is with her friends having fun but how can they do that after two years. TRUST ME FOR THEM LOVE IS JUST A GAME THEY PLAY.i wish i could get over her asap cuz its killing me i cant work cant go to skool cuz everwhere i go it remindds me of her. PLEASE PLEASE dont fall in love have fun as much as u can while ur younger cuz life is too too short. thanks for reading this i maybe dont make since but thats wats in my mind to write……..
I felll in love with this guy. He made me feel so special and needed and just so many things that nobody’s eveer made me feel before. In the end he randomly stopped talking to me. He didn’t even tell me why. I feel so pathetic because he’s happy and has a new girlfriend who’s gorgeous and I’m still crying over him.