Maine Middle School to Offer Birth Control to 11 Year Olds
October 17, 2007 by Sara Ost
Filed under Boys & Girls
Being sexually active is so much better than lip gloss!
After learning that some of its students are sexually active, a Portland middle school is wading into controversial territory by planning to offer contraceptives such as birth control and the patch to girls as young as 11. The school already offers condoms.
A few more relevant details:
- Written parental consent would be a requirement, though the child would not have to disclose what service is specifically being received.
- It is illegal to have sex in Maine if you are under 14 (because nothing stops sexual behavior like a law!)
- The school is hoping to prevent pregnancies and keep more girls in school; parents feel that offering birth control is effectively enabling sexual activity in preteens.
I don’t really see what the big deal is here. Aside from the self-evident fact that children should start having sex as soon as possible so that we can finally eliminate that annoying societal relic known as mystery, consider the obvious mental health benefits. Middle school girls are often ruthlessly teased by their male peers for being flat-chested, surely to the detriment of their self-esteem. That’s nothing a daily dose of estrogen can’t fix!
When I was 11, I was making out with the bathroom mirror. To think how different it could have been! Sure, the bathroom mirror can’t get you pregnant, but it’s also cold and emotionally unavailable and those are the scars that never heal.
A little weird that 11 year olds are getting it, but hey, its better than abstinence edu!
Someone is sure to point out that 11 is too young. I agree. However, there shouldn’t be an age limit on ignorance. Knowing these services are available has never been proven to encourage behaviors which would facilitate their use.
Sure 11 is young , but if the girls are already having sex, they’d better be getting birth control – and some counseling. Probably their parents could use some too.
This is sad. It is absolutely enabling them. What they need are parents who are present. What they need are mentors who help them to realize that this behavior, aside from being immoral and leading to the breakdown of society, will cripple them in their efforts to reach their greatest potential. Life has a much deeper meaning than they are being led to believe.
As someone grown enough to have the clarity of hindsight, I can say that I was saved from many a destructive decision by not wanting to disappoint my father (who actually was married to my mother) and by my faith.
Kids are far more willing to experiment with sex when everyone tells them that everyone else is doing it and there’s nothing wrong. There’s a lot wrong with this.
Chelsea, while I personally don’t love the idea of kids having sex so young, in all fairness, the school is not really enabling beyond providing the prescriptions. They do provide counseling to active children discussing the risks and encouraging them to wait. There is definitely no message that “everyone is doing it”. The school is caught in a tough place because it is in the interest of the public to have kids healthy and finishing school, rather than dropping out and burdening the system.
I was also raised in a faith-based home and was strongly encouraged to abstain. Like many kids brought up in this way, I ultimately fell off the wagon
. There are many ways to raise a child successfully. A good friend of mine in high school was raised in a virtually atheist home where they talked openly about sex, drugs, and all the rest. I remember being shocked by this – and by going with her to the doctor to get the pill, which her parents insisted she take. We both were top students, went to good universities, and she’s a completely healthy, happy, well-adjusted adult who never got “into trouble”. The point here is that we shouldn’t generalize about the best way to raise a child or educate them about sex – it really is individual. Communication and parental responsibility are vital, but those things apply whether you’re raising a child to adhere to certain religious and moral guidelines or not. Just my two cents’. Thanks for sharing yours 
I agree with the two previous comments. It is enabling, however it is not the school that is doing it, it is the parents. I personally believe in abstinence before marriage due to my faith, but that does not mean that those who do not believe the way I do should not encourage their children to abstain. The problem is parents are not talking or guiding their children to make wise decisions or have consequences for their actions. The bottom line is that lack of parental guidance and supervision is the problem.
this is so incredibly heartbreaking! and i can’t believe you can talk about it so lightly! ELEVEN YEAR OLDS HAVING SEX?! i mean, are you really thinking about what that means? 5th and 6th graders having sexual relationships! and where does this school get off by making such a big decision FOR the parents, how are parents suppose to teach their kids right from wrong when they are required to send their kids to school all day long only to learn they are being told that having sex at 11 is normal. THIS is why i don’t even want to have kids anymore. i love kids, but trying to raise decent children in this corrupt society is seeming to be impossible with all the extra “help” from outside sources.
At least homeschooling and private schools are still legal!
At least homeschooling and private schools are still legal, for now.
Most schools aren’t even allowed to give cough syrup to kids w/o parental consent! This is absurd! They are overstepping their bounds and if they are aware of a child having sex the most they should be able to do is inform the parents and let them handle it. Period. It is also teaching kids to keep secrets from their parents.
to be honest about all dis shit, i am only 17 years old and i even say i should have waited for sex….i never wanted to tell my parents that i was sexually active but if u are grown enough to have sex then your grown enough to tell your parents to be on the safe side.. however the school should let the parents deal with their own child. that is not their place to go giving 11 year olds birthcontrol, once they have did that then the child start to think that everything is okay..i can understand its better to be careful then not at all but again not for a child who is barely fully developed.
Well I would say that I am speechless, but here I am writing my first blog response ever.
I think it is absurd to say that this is the solution to the melodrama that teens face in their adolescence. Like a 12 year old doesn’t get teased about being sexually active AND being “flat-chested”.
Maybe we should consider the fact that 80% of High School girls regret that they’ve had sex. Maybe when you start talking to the children themselves, rather than presupposing what’s “good” for them, you’ll find the confusion, regret, pain, (insert negative emotion here) involved with sexual activity at a young age.
I’m by no means saying that I am supportive of abstinence education AT ALL, especially when you consider the lack of research done to support its approach, but o give a 12 year old the PRIVATE choice of ingesting insane amounts of estrogen without parental consent is ridiculous; As if any 12 year old knows what they want, especially when it comes to birth control.
This reminds me of what happened in Texas when the governor tried to make the HPV vaccine mandatory for all 12 year old girls. The drug hadn’t been tested long-term, a few people made a fuss, and it was found that the governors primary campaign supporter was the drug company who produced the vaccine.
I wonder whose pockets pharmaceutical companies have their hands in this time.
What concerns me most about this issue is that most 11 or 12 year olds who are engaging in sex are being coerced or abused. The dispensing of meds could be beneficial in that healthcare providers are under ethical obligation to mandatory report abuse of children. On the other hand this could conveniently aide Uncle Joe to continue to molest his niece without the fear of impregnating her.
Also how many 12 year olds are truly going to be complaint taking their birth control pills as prescribed and be mindful of other med interactions(antintibiotics for acne) and health problems such as bulimia that will totally nullify the effect of the pill.
King has a large population of low-income students. The way the rules are written, parents only have the option to opt in, or out, of the services at the health clinic. It seems wrong that parents, especially those with low incomes, have to choose between permitting their child to access birth control services and between blocking access to the clinic entirely. Other parents might not even realize that their child might be prescribed birth control *without express consent* when they allow their child to be treated for a headache or a cold at the clinic.
The way the rule is written undermines parental involvement and decision-making. This is wrong. The most effective advocate for a child is his or her parents. Why would the school make it harder for parents to be involved and make decisions that concern their children?
Sara-
Do you really think that an 11-year old boy is emotionally available?
Does pregnancy really mean that a girl can’t finish up school? Wouldn’t a better solution involve creating a program to allow pregnant teens to finish high school? Or do you think there won’t be any pregnant teens now that the middle school offers birth control?
Sadly, many teen girls have sex because they’re looking for affection and intimacy. Of course they often don’t find it from Mr. Fourteen Year Old, because he’s only a kid himself. Sometimes these girls even become pregnant deliberately….all because they’re looking for companionship and love.
I think the argument for birth control pills focuses more on funding. Public school administrators are faced with a situation that negatively impacts their student body (sorry…). To appear responsible and to address the issue, they have two viable choices: counseling or prescriptions. So which costs less money: hiring a counselor, or shoving pills in the kids’ faces?
The decision, coming from a fiscally-focused, administrative perspective, is clear. And the fact that they’re most likely receiving discounts from some pharmaceutical company may sweeten the deal even more. Sure, counseling and family therapy of some sort would be more effective in the long run, but is it the most affordable choice? Not for a public school in Maine, I’d imagine.
Steve – interesting comments.
Sarah – of course I don’t think 11 year old boys are emotionally available! Goodness. I would hope that my comments about flat chests and the bathroom mirror would be seen for the obvious absurdities that they are. I doubt that even 18 year old boys are emotionally available (or girls either, for that matter). I personally don’t think children should be having sex, and who does? Nevertheless I do understand the school’s reasoning – though you make a great point about how the logic may be faulty.
While I would agree that the idea of 11 and 12 year olds being sexually active is appalling, I think that it is morally irresponsible to deny access to contraception to those students that are having sex. Despite the number of times that government and faith-based organizations claim that sex ed will “enable” kids to have sex younger … there isn’t concrete evidence to support this. I, for one, would rather my kid take responsibility for her choices than find out about them when it’s already too late. I talked about this more in depth here.
Ok, Maine is rethinking its plan. Here’s the update: http://www.edweek.org/ew/articles/2007/10/23/12883apmemiddleschoolcontraceptives.html
Honestly, I don’t think this is making kids think that having sex at 11 is “normal” or “ok.” I thought it was fairly common knowledge that some kids about 11 were having sex (I’ve read it various places for the past several years) and that even more kids were engaging in oral sex by middle school. I know that, when I was 11, my 12 year old best friend lost her virginity. She’s 20 now and, no, she does not regret it.
I also know that I had my period by the time I was 11 and many girls are getting their periods younger and younger. If these girls are having sex (I’m not going to say they should be, but some of them obviously are) then they need to be protected. It breaks my heart to be at the doctor’s and see the 12 year old pregnant girl getting a check-up.
This is where everyone jumps in and says, “Well, they shouldn’t be having sex if they can’t handle the consequences!” Right. Because you’ve never done anything stupid. Because you’ve never done anything that seemed like a good idea at the time. Mmhmm.
I find that, often, the same people who complain about exposing teens and preteens to birth control are the ones who are too scared to talk to their own children and explain to them the choices they have when it comes to sex.
And in response to Chelsea’s comment about private schools – I went to a private elementary school but public junior high and high schools. My friends who continued in private schools were the ones who ended up having unprotected sex by the age of 13 and drinking/doing drugs/partying by 15. The more restrictions you place on a child, the more likely they are to rebel.
And wow that was a lot of stuff.
I think this is a great idea! If your child is going to have sex, theyre going to have sex, with or without your permission. I dont see why a parent wouldnt want their kids to be responsilbe. No, it doesnt protect against stds or anything else, but like i said, theyre going to have sex reguardless. And chances are they are going to do it without condoms anyway. Would you really want your child to come home pregnant? Or would you at least face reality and give them some kind of protection. Sex is sex. Its not as horrible as everyone makes it out to me. Its not a big deal as long as the people engaging in it are responsible. And if they are responsible enough to get it in the first place then good for them.
^^^ typo!!
Sex is sex. Its not as horrible as everyone makes it out to BE.
I don’t understand those who insist that it is immoral and wrong. We can’t judge that. We know there are many kind of sex from abusive sex and violent sex to tender intimacy. And I don’t feel like claiming a priori that the sexual experience of a young kid can’t be of the last kind and therefore a beautiful human enriching experience. And the reason I say this is that while I have known people that felt pressured into sex at that age and regret it I also know people who had sexual experiences that were friendly and tender and they don’t regret them at all.
I think the problem with people like you is that you consider sex a bad thing a priori subconsciously, even if you don’t want to admit it to yourself, and when you imagine sex you must imagine power struggle, shame and indecency. You can’t see physical intimacy as inherently a beautiful and delicate human act and so you’re just projecting your own sexual phobias and frustractions on people who are living it as something beautiful not as something pornographic or degrading.
When Reich was studying the most peaceful population known to man he found out that the matriarcal social system considered sexual contacts between kids as something healthy that they explored on their own by their own instinct and choice without negative consequences.
You say they have sex because they’re looking for affection and intimacy but this is what sex is: physical affection and intimacy.
The idea that showing interest for sex at the age of 11 or 12 means that one has been abused is just the most absurb unscientific nonsense ever.
I remember all my schoolmates, myself included, talking about sex or experimenting and seeking physical contacts and neither I nor them has ever been abused or exposed to born or what not.
I started masturbating at the age of 6 and was having sexual feelings before the kids of this Maine school. Yet I had a perfect normal and happy childhood and even health conscious parents that wanted me to by physical active, eat healthy and avoid being a videogames coach potato.
You all talk about science yet you should know better since there are scientific studies showing that peer sexual games, contacts and experimenting are observed in every healthy kid from 5 years old on.
The truth is that giving them contraceptives and explaining to them how to avoid unwanted pregnancy would make you lack any sort of decent argument as to why what they do and feel like doing is wrong or immoral. Besides, you’re completely wrong and living in a bubble if you believe these experiences as kids are just something of the modern times and due to television, magazines and internet.
Since you claim to be all scientific and such you should read studies on the subjects and see that being taught that whatever sexual feeling at that age is wrong, that being forbidden from having physical intimacy at that age after the parents find out, being denied the freedom to experience with you own body at that age and being taught that you’re wrong in considering beautiful and loving something that your parents consider disgusting and pervert is way more traumatic than any sexual experience could ever been and in fact there are a lot of evidences that repression is traumatic and no evidence that non-violent and non-abusive experiences at that age are traumatic. For those kids the irrational stigma against what they do is what causes the trauma.
Well thinking of 11 year old and 12 year olds facing a dangerous world of pregnancy and diseases that could ever stick with them for the rest of their life just makes me feel what could we do about protecting kids from ever beign exposed but yes sexual education is being taught when it was me learning it was in 5th grade and 4th grade periods all this stuff is pretty absurd. But by all the television and internet by the time your 10 your child will be exsposed to it at some point of time. And I dont mean to let children have sex just be aware of it and speak out about it because sex is just a intimacy and sexual feelings and 12 years old are feeling intimacy so let it be as I follow. Relationships as of 11 thats young but get this stay with your child on this and you sure do not your child raped (made to have unwanted sex you know)
Children are exposed to it naturally period.
If you send a group of children in a island with no kind of sexual education in schools, no older kids talking about sex, not television talking about sex, not magazines making articles about sex, no music talking about sex they would anyway know about sex, they would anyway discover masturbation at a very young age, they would anyway feel sexual feelings and urges at a very young age and would anyway experiment and seek physical contacts at the same age of those Maine students.
Raping has absolutely nothing to do with sexual awareness and feelings since the victim of a rape could be anyone. In fact preventing rape has a lot to do with information; talking about rights and talking about unwated sexual contacts and wanted sexual contacts. Going the paranoid and irrational way and claiming that whatever feeling, whatever urge and whatever touch is evil and immoral just makes it a lot harder to protect kids and even young adults from abusive sex.
If htye want to have sex let them but make sure they are under birth control!!! And make sure you know the boy before they start.
If they want to have sex let them but make sure they are under birth control!!! And make sure you know the boy before they start.
I am 11 and i never want to do that its disgusting. And That school is just trying hard to get those kids to have sex. its so wrong.
eyauazywqfyojpldwell, hi admin adn people nice forum indeed. how’s life? hope it’s introduce branch
well, i think that its okay for girls to have sex at such a young age these days. do you know how hard it is on a girl now and days? yeah its pretty hard i should know i go high school. even though i havent had sex yet but i think that its pretty commin for girls to have sex at such an yung age dude.
The school is not telling the kids go ahead, have sex. Weather or not the school is giving out birth control, its up to the kids weather or not to have sex. Just because birth control is offered doesnt mean more kids will have sex. the ones already sexually active will just be more protected, since its their own foolish decision.
woah’ ii dont not beliveee in middle school qiving this out to 11 year olds. thats nott cutee at all. thats showinnn little qirl of aqe 11 to have sex. and be sexually activee. i under stand that the qirls are reachinq pubirty. but i honestly belive middle school should not be qivinq bitrh control pills, condoms , or even patches to little qirls. !!!! wait till they are sofemores. i think thats a proper aqee
The reason kids feel “bad” about sex is that our society has turned a perfectly natural activity into a big deal. The more mystique you give to something, the more appealing it becomes to children. I was raised in a religious family and taught “abstinence only”. I got pregnant at 19. I wish that there had been an easy way for me to get protection, but there wasn’t. Thank goodness for progress. Now, if we can get rid of the supersitious nonsense that pervades our society (”god” etc.), we will finally begin to get somewhere.
I’m really concerned that we care more when a person does something that how that person does something.
We are so delusional about this that that between a 20 year old that didn’t enjoy her first sexual experience, she had only to impress someone or because she was tricked into it or because of low self-esteem, with a guy that treated her a like a sex object the whole time AND a girl of 12 who chose to have sex, with a boy she liked and who was gentle to her, and that considered her desire to have sex with more maturity and responsability than the 20 year old taking precautions and enoying the experience; we might actually think that the better example and experience is the first one… just because the second one was “too young” no matter how factually good and positive the experience was and how objectively mature and responsible the girl was.
I will never understand how can people choose to function at such a low intellectual level to really convince themselves that a simple number determines how ready you are to make a choice and how that choice will turn.
This stupid belief also underestimates the struggle of over 18
Not only people believe that before a certain age every choice you make will be the wrong one and will have negative consequences but they also believe that after a certain age every choice you make will be the right one and everything you do will have positive consequences and you don’t need protection from friends or well-meant people.
And actually from my example the 20 year old girl needed more protection, help in making a choice and more maturity to take a decision than the 12 year old.
I’m very worried that we’re so preoccupied with the superficial details of something that we ignore the substance and the content, I’m very worried that we are more preoccupied with telling kids to wait X age to make whatever stupid thing a human being might want to do, rather than making them understand that it’s the HOW that it’s important not the WHEN.
The wrong thing is not any less wrong because a 30 year old does it.
And the right thing is not any less right because a 12 year old does it.
I can’t believe how certain parents prohibit their children from doing anything untile age 18 but are perfectly fine with them making all the things they wanted them not to do as long as they’re 18 and older. Which is like saying that those parents were not really interested in educating their children and shaping their character so they would be kind and honest individuals, they were more worried about conforming them to the imaginary myth of the innocent kid so has not to be judged as bad parents.
This is actually the opposite of education.
The idea that as long as you’re older than 18, this number is a social invention without meaning, you will better at everything, you will make better choices and task will be easier (think of the nonsense teen-pregnancy scare where they pass on the ridicolous idea that as long as you 18+ parenting is easier and less of a struggle) is asinine to say the least.
Expecially if compared with the empirical truth of how immature and irresponsible most adults are and how more closed minded, rigid, absolutist and naive they have become by growing older; indeed following a common path of the mature self-thinking teen conforming into a dull, unthinking and immature adult.