Question of the month: What is the best advice you ever got?
January 2, 2009 by Cyndi Lavin
Filed under Artist Communities, General Jewelry Musings, Question of the Month
Since it’s the beginning of a brand new year, I thought we should think about the past for a moment. After all, if we’re going to set new year’s resolutions (yeah, yeah, I know it’s corny, but I do it!), shouldn’t we think back and reflect on what has actually worked for us in the past?
As far as my art and jewelry career goes, the best advice I ever got was to enter contests and calls for entries, especially those that cost me nothing but time. Why the heck not? Not winning doesn’t really hurt that much, and winning is really really cool.
So what’s the best piece of advice you ever got? It doesn’t have to be about jewelry making or beading, but it can be. If you’d like to share your moment, you can either leave me a comment below, or email me your advice, along with your link and an image of your work that you’d like to share. Send it to cyndi @ b5Media.com (remove the spaces) and please use the subject heading J&B advice.
I know it’s been said before, but using table risers, and lights made a HUGE and immediate impact in my show sales.
I love beading, and spend alot of time doing it, but the best advice I ever got was, “Try always to be kind. It is the greatest human wisdom.”
That’s a breath of fresh air in this rude world, Deirdre…thanks for the reminder
Angie, I made that point to a woman I met at a show recently. She had gorgeous stuff, but everyone was flocking to another vendor who had better displays, even though the workmanship was inferior! It was her first show, so she just didn’t know. Thanks much!
The best advice I’ve received is: Share what you know with others and you will learn from them.
Yes! There are so many pursuits in the world where people are motivated by competition and greed…beading doesn’t have to be one of them!
Accept failure and work past it – keep trying until you are pleased with it.
NEVER GIVE UP OR GIVE IN: Determination, will.
Perfection is impossible, allow imperfection.
I Started writing more in 2008 when I gave God my desire for perfection on my inner altar – I had a writer’s block for a decade plus – when I gave up my desire for perfection – boom, boom, boom – the dam burst. I am typing my notes up, now, a few hours of every day.
PS – if someone, here, doesn’t believe in God, sorry. Give it up to the universe or a passing pigeon, the point is to accept imperfect as part of the act of creation.
Darn biggest lesson in my entire life!!!!!!!!
Agree with the displays comments. I know, as a shopper, I am attracted to well lit, well presented displays even if the price is a little higher, just human nature, I suspect. If you ever want to test it.. look for something you really like, don’t buy it .. then, look for it when it goes on clearance table. LOL
Agree with the kindness comment, also. Make friends, be kind. the universe is full of nasties, don’t be one of them!
In my world of art and everything else that life is, the greatest advice I got was from a curator of a fine arts gallery I was interviewing for. This wise hard core woman said to me, “Keep your work simple. Don’t over do it. Simplicity is genious.” I’ve always found that she was right on the mark when it came to my paintings as well as everything else in my world. She also told me, “It’s when we forget our true focus we loose the power of what we are meant to be and do.” This is true in life as well as in art. So to me I know walking away from a painting or a large piece of bead work, or anything that’s giving me a challenge is the best thing to do. As is in life. Coming back when my head is clear, gives me clarity of spirit and heart. This is not giving up, it’s kind of like just taking a needed time out. For me this works.
I often do the same thing in writing. Editing myself is difficult to do, impossible, sometimes. Keeping focus is an important aspect of writing, listening to the characters, hearing their voices, their movements through the scene, interactions with other characters, etc. Sometimes just walk away. Focus returns.
NOT so sure about simplicity being genius or generous. I like complexity, detail, nuance and shading and my favorite period in art is the High Renaissance.
Focus is even important in One’s spiritual life & studies, loosing focus is deadly to the soul.
The best advice I got regarding my jewelry is to stop being such a perfectionist and to be proud of my work. Perfectionism has always held me back and I’m really trying to move past it. It’s a personal struggle but I’m determined.
“Don’t get emotionally involved with your work. You must be able to recognize when something isn’t working and be willing to abandon it if it can’t be fixed.” — Said by a pottery instructor. Eventually I had to admit that pottery wasn’t working for me. I’ve since become a beader — I love beading and beading loves me!
Thank you all so much for so generously sharing your advice! I think I see some common themes developing here: though we may have different ideas about what constitutes the *content* of work that we’re pleased with, the *process* seems to be similar for all of us. Work. Work hard. Keep perspective. Be gentle and kind. Know when to take a break, when to persevere, and when to try a new direction.
I’m taking all of it to heart, because I have a MAJOR decision to make this year. I think I’ve made it, and I think my choice is the right one, but I still want to be open to allowing my mind to be changed before my decisions become set in concrete lol!!
Lee – here is a spiritual discipline.. if you don’t believe in God, etc. Don’t worry about it but use the visualization to help yourself, anyway:
Build in your imagination a sacred place. It can look like a church or temple, a garden or a forest glade.. It MUST be yours. Build it in your imagination. Work at it. Put in this sacred place your favorite things – pictures of what ever deity you believe in, your favorite images, paintings.. (remember this is all inside of YOU. )
Now build an altar. Place candles, etc, what ever seems appropriate.
Now for the ceremony. Give yourself a lot of quiet time. I built, a long time ago a way to get to my altar, a corridor with candles and doors … now, in the silence, go there. Imagine yourself dressed as a priestess, holy woman or a celebrant. Have a torch or candles already burning on the altar a bowl.. maybe stone or brass, or .
Now meditate, place your desire to be perfect in the bowl.. pour scented oil into the bowl, reach for the fire and set the scented oil afire.
Bow, say prayers what seem appropriate or not. Keep saying “I give this _____ (desire to be perfect, what ever) to God, gods, the cosmos, what ever is your supreme deity. )
This ceremony may have to done many times before you see a change. Now start listening to yourself – what silent messages do you give yourself about perfection? STOP giving them. When you recognize and hear these messages.. give them to God. (how ever you consider him/she to be !)
If you draw or paint — then paint or draw your sacred place… make it as real to yourself as you can. USE your imagination as a tool.
As selfish as it might sound, someone told me to “stop trying to please others and live for yourself.” That was in relation to being in a group that basically sucked all free-time away and expected far more from me than the “volunteer” position it was supposed to be, even to the point of branding me as “unreliable” when I switched to a new full-time job that involved shift-work and was no longer available regularly.
Sometimes the answer to “Who’s going to do it if you don’t?” is “Not me. Please start looking for a replacement” and follow through on being finished. Since then, I’ve been happier, and able to concentrate on actual hobbies I wanted, rather than trying to fit them in around a full time job and another schedule that was like another full-time job.
That was part of becoming independent to chart my own course in life. For an actual life philosophy, I try to live the Desiderata.
http://www.fleurdelis.com/desiderata.htm
True, very true. It doesn’t sound selfish, it sounds realistic and a true realization of your place in the ‘grand scheme of things’ ! Keep your feet on the cool, green earth-stay grounded in reality. Be realistic about yourself and role on the stage of life.
Give yourself permission to take a day off and create something that pleases YOU.
I think letting go and realizing you can’t save the world is a matter of faith. In my world-view, Its God/Christ’s job to save the world, I am just one of his humble servants; I do what I can, but I am not so important that the world falls apart when I take a week, off, does it?
I totally agree! There’s nothing selfish whatsoever about making work that pleases you and structuring your life to be the best you can possibly be.
Paul, your statement “Not me. Please start looking for a replacement” is one that I’m going to be using this year. Maybe not in those exact words, but I’ll be resigning from a commitment that has been sapping the life out of me for several years now
I do have problems with one corollary to Paul’s problem – I feel guilty when I sit down during the day and just do what I want to do -writing, beading, sewing,etc. Writing, especially, gives me all kinds of guilt when I sit down.
My family hammered into my soul “work, work, work’ from about 14yrs., on, and I still fight that secret message in my sub-conscious. I don’t consider my crafts and writing work, they are pleasure and play, so I feel guilty doing them when real work – housekeeping, for example, need being done.
Speaking of advice, got any? LOL LOL !!!
Hmmm…that’s a tough one for me, because my pleasure and play *are* my work. (I know, lucky blessed me!) All I can really think of is the old adage, “If the momma ain’t happy, ain’t no one happy”. I think that goes for the wife, the husband, the daughter or son, the daddy, and everyone else too, really
You are very fortunate, Cyndi. I did make some money off my crafts for a short time in the 1990s.
My writing, “my words” is another matter. My husband thinks that if I was ever to bring financial wealth to the family it would not be my crafts, realistically, it would be my writings. I’ve promised myself that I will write more in the New Year and one of my friends has asked me to give her one of my stories for a Christmas gift. Nothing was ready … but, well, next year?
Do you notice how our crafts make us examine inner lives, the deep down recesses of our souls?
Craft as spiritual discipline?
Craft as a part of our life’s philosophy?
Relaxing.. allowing imperfection, giving permission to (myself) to play, detachment (martie’s wisdom) kindness, generosity, all the rest, sounds like a coherent philosophy of life, doesn’t it?
Oh, Paul – I like Desiderata, also – had a wall plaque of it that I had up in my study for years. Wonder where that thing went?
A family member was looking at all my finished pieces, and commented on my tendency to use certain colors. He asked me why I didn’t use any orange. Well,I don’t happen to like orange. His reply: you aren’t making it for you.
That comment has freed my creative process numerous times! I don’t have to fall in love with every piece I make. I also don’t have to use “my” colors. After all, I won’t be the one wearing it! Such freedom to venture out of my color/style comfort zone!
Kathleen Mary: creating is *definitely* a spiritual discipline for me, personally. I love my Creator, and I create for His glory.
Nora: that’s an important point for those who want to sell. We don’t need to be all things to all people, but it is freeing to occasionally work with colors, materials, etc that are (initially) outside our comfort zone. We can stretch our zone that way
As I do, Dear Cyndi – love is what matters. Religion is of earth, love is eternal! God is worthy of our love.
(in my humble gnostic opinion.)
I think it was Bach who always wrote at the bottom of his masterpieces: “For the greater glory of God!”
The Renaissance philosophers said that Nature was the mirror in which we see the mind of God. Scientists have forgotten this but that is why the Renaissance became the womb of science, not break away from religion,entirely, or reject God, but understand the Divine ONE better.
When we manipulate bead, thread, yarn, etc. we become minor creators. particularly, if we do it,chiefly, for love’s sake, just, as He did.How better to know & love to the creator than be an artist or crafts-person?
Ah, trying new colors. I hate orange, too. just can’t stand the thing. Had to create some orange things when I was selling my work, others like it. I can bear it, mostly, if I put it with browns – green works, too, but, ick, a pumpkin.
LOL
Problem is we favor colors( mine are garnet-hunter green-maroon, gold)- when we create, one of our questions is about beauty, is it beautiful? How can we create something we think is ugly?
I try to look at nature – find color inspirations,there, what colors look best together? That is how I dealt with Orange.
As for stretching yourself in other directions: Learn, learn, learn new things until the day you die. End of Each year ask yourself :what NEW did I learn this year? Earth is a classroom, my friends, we live to learn.
Ahhh, see I think there is a difference between creating to sell vs creating for pleasure. A rare few can “get away” with creating only things that please themselves, even when they are creating for sale, but I would guess (and it’s only a guess) that most of us who sell need to occasionally try things that might not be our personal faves. Not necessarily so, because what works for one will not always work for another.
That’s why I can seemingly talk out of both sides of my mouth when it comes to these tips! Yes, you must create to please yourself. Yes, you must take your customers’ taste into account. Yes, you should mostly work with the materials you like. Yes, you should stretch yourself whenever possible.
See what I mean? It all depends upon personal goals, I believe
Yes, very true, and- when I pleased myself most, the pieces sold. I was working for a ‘new age’ store.. made a line that worked with stones and nearly fine jewelry findings. (SS & GF) lovely pieces. I had to pry the pieces out of my hands after I finished them! (talk about detachment!)LOL
Had to charge a lot because of the quality and price of the components, yet, in this little neighborhood store they all sold out. The things I didn’t like (some kids jewelry I made, simple bracelets.) I’ve got to break apart one of these days. I called the line “Memories (of the past)” “Ancient Egypt with true carnelian, Lapis etc. etc. Atlantis – all blues, also with some lapis – Greece, all Greens & gold that looked like you would see it on the neck of Pericles’ girl friend Wanted to add Rome and the Middle Ages when the store closed. And people were asking me to make matching pieces..by then.
Wrote up an explanation with each piece ! I think those pieces were the finest things I have ever made.
What was heart-breaking is I was starting to learn how to be business woman. Loved the work, though, really did, learned how to keep records, price things – my husband helped me build a data base program so I could figure out exactly what things cost to make! I think if the store hadn’t folded I’d still be doing it and doing it better than ever.
Hey, dumb me, didn’t take pictures!
It sounds simple, but the best jewelry-making advice I received was “keep your loops round and your wraps tight.” When I slow down and work carefully, the end result is much better and I’m more satisfied with the entire process.
Sometimes the simplest things make the hugest difference, Karin! Thanks for the reminder to get our technique perfected