This is but one paragraph of his written words from the A.A. Grapevine printed in September, 1948 which clearly demonstrates his devotion and commitment to A.A.’s”original,” God-based “design for living.” [Back To Basics - The Alcoholics Anonymous Beginners Meetings, pgs. 163-164]

“As finally expressed and offered, they [the Twelve Steps] are simple in language, plain in meaning. They are workable by any person having a sincere desire to obtain and keep sobriety. The results are the proof. Their simplicity and workability are such that no special interpretations, and certainly no reservations, have ever been necessary. And it has become increasingly clear that the degree of harmonious living which we achieve is in direct ratio to our earnest attempt to follow them under divine guidance to the best of our ability.”

“It works – it really does.”

Post from: Blisstree

The Sheer Simplicity Of The Twelve Steps

Thought about referring to The Akron Manual which was reprinted at Barefoot’s to give us an idea how the oldtimers did it in the beginning but I decided on this – “The Insanity Of Alcohol.” Ya’ see Micky, you have some worth – you motivated my mind to what could kill me and I used the tools. Now I’ll pass on what I can…

What exactly is “The Insanity Of Alcohol?” Do you believe it is the “goofy,” or silly behavior we all exhibit when we’re drinking? It isn’t. If it were, everyone would have to join AA who had consumed a bit too much. The Insanity Of Alcohol, for an alcoholic – “is the alcoholic’s persistent return to alcohol in the face of overwhelming evidence that it is destroying his or her life, over and over again.”

“It is our physical as well as our mental response to alcohol that is INSANE, and that is what separates the alcoholic from the non-alcoholic.”

“What Dr. Silkworth called the ‘phenomenon of craving,’ manifesting as an ‘allergy,’ is so overpowering that all else comes in second to our primary concern of getting the next drink, even life itself takes second place.”

Even life itself takes second place grabs MY personal attention! I’d love to say it’s hard today to imagine that I had placed my family, their lives and mine on the back burner when I drank but that’s exactly what I did and admitting anything less would be lying. I hear a lot of folks attempting to rationalize themselves past this one!

To quote from Barefoot;

“As a young man (with tears in his eyes) in his first AA meeting said:

‘I’m here because I just want to live … that’s it … I just want to live’

It is as Simple as that!!!”

Post from: Blisstree

Because I Just Want To Live!

First things first, in 1993, with almost 4 years sober, I was diagnosed as a “depressive.” My sponsor was with me when this happened. It is a much longer story than what you’ll see now but it revolved around my divorce.

Therefore, for me, depression involves relationships and my need for attention and my need to be needed.

Bill understood. He wrote a letter to a fellow AA member and talked about depression and – LOVE.

Go figure…

Bill found himself staring at the St. Francis prayer, “It is better to comfort than to be comforted.” He knew he was looking at the answer yet he couldn’t see it!

Then, he says;

“Suddenly I realized what the matter was … My basic flaw had always been dependence, almost absolute dependence on people or circumstances to supply me with prestige, security, and the like. Failing to get these things according to my perfectionist dreams and specifications, I had fought for them. And when defeat came so did my depression.”

And then, the answer;

“There wasn’t a chance of making the outgoing love of St. Francis a workable and joyous way of life until these fatal and almost absolute dependencies were cut away.

Reinforced by what grace I could secure in prayer, I found I had to exert every ounce of will and action to cut off these faulty emotional dependencies upon people, upon AA, indeed upon any set of circumstances whatsoever.

Then only could I be free to love as Francis had. Emotional and institutional satisfactions, I saw, were really the extra dividends of having love, offering love, and expressing a love appropriate to each relation of life.

Plainly, I could not avail myself of God’s love until I was able to offer it back to Him by loving others as He would have me. And I couldn’t possibly do that as long as I was victimized by false dependencies.

For my dependency meant demand … a demand for the possession and control of the people and the conditions surrounding me.

This seems to be the primary healing circuit, an outgoing love of God’s creation and His people, by means of which we avail ourselves of His love for us. It is most clear that the real current can’t flow until our paralyzing dependencies are broken, and broken at depth. Only then can we possibly have a glimmer of what adult love really is.

If we examine every disturbance we have, great or small, we will find at the root of it some unhealthy dependency and its consequent demand. Let us, with God’s help, continually surrender these hobbling demands. Then we can be set free to live and love; we may then be able to gain emotional sobriety.”

Rick, I owe you a huge debt of gratitude for what you taught me about this “stuff!” Thanks… (And one more hat tip to the West Baltimore Group for doing a wonderful job supplying the letters from Bill W.)

Post from: Blisstree

The Twelve Steps Working To Release Depression?

This is the opening disclaimer;

Alcoholics Anonymous is a program for alcoholics who seek freedom from alcohol. It is not a program against drugs. However, some A.A. members have misused drugs, often as a substitute for alcohol, in such a manner as to become a threat to the achievement and maintenance of sobriety. These incidents have caused all A.A. members to be concerned with what is popularly known as the “pill problem.”

Often as a substitute. Yep, that’s me! I also used them to offer myself the opportunity to tell “you” that I didn’t have an alcohol problem, I had a drug problem. Worked – for a while, hah!

The following are suggestions from page 5 of this pamphlet. Please, click through and read the entire publication.

1. Remember that as a recovering alcoholic your automatic response will be to turn to chemical relief for uncomfortable feelings and to take more than the usual, prescribed amount. Look for nonchemical solutions for the aches and discomforts of everyday living.
2. Remember that the best safeguard against drug-related relapse is an active participation in the A.A. program of recovery.
3. No A.A. Member Plays Doctor.
4. Be completely honest with yourself and your physician regarding use of medication.
5. If in doubt, consult a physician with demonstrated experience in the treatment of alcoholism.
6. Be frank about your alcoholism with any physician or dentist you consult. Such confidence will be respected and is most helpful to the doctor.
7. Inform the physician at once if you experience side effects from prescribed drugs.

If you’ve been “playing” doctor, please stop it, NOW! If you’ve witnessed someone else playing Doctor, lose your fear and tell THEM to stop!

Post from: Blisstree

Medications and Other Drugs

Following up on the “crosstalk” topic… we have an email written from a oldtime member of AA;

Date: Thurs, Aug 21 2008 4:22 pm
From: olemole

I’ve been around and sober for close to 37 years and so called crosstalk in one meeting is standard format in another all depends on the size and make up of the meeting. Cross talk is as old as AA.

On Aug 18, 8:52 am, Sottovoice wrote:

“I have to profess that I am not one who understands the detailed history of “cross talk” or what it really has to do with AA but I do know it didn’t exist as an idea until fairly recently (last 10 years or so). Today’s definition is one where someone shares on someone else’s share. It is tantamount to someone leading off their share with “I don’t want any feedback but…” That is appropriate if you feel that AA meetings are places to dump your stuff (There is a four letter word more descriptive but this is a family show) and split. If that is what you feel AA meetings to be it might be better to share that stuff with a sponsor instead.

But if I was to share in a meeting that I enjoyed drowning puppies in my spare time and saw no problem with that I would hope someone would let me know that sobriety isn’t measured by the drinks I didn’t take but by the spiritual life I need to live.

I’m sure there’ll be a couple of angry comments but if I want to go somewhere and dump there are better places to do that than an AA meeting. If I’m afraid that my comments won’t be well received I might save those comments for my sponsor – clearing my conscience at the expense of others and insisting that no one should say anything about it is a little arrogant and selfish. And, God forbid, it becomes fodder for the rumor mill – all the more reason it should be shared with a sponsor who may be able to give some valuable experience or direct you to someone who does.

Jim
The Into Action Group of Manhattan
DOS 8/8/80″

I’ll say it again – thanks God for those who’ve developed wisdom in its simplest terms.

Post from: Blisstree

A Member’s Eye View Of “Crosstalk”

Thanks again Alex…

“No look at anonymity as practiced by AA can be truly complete without including the question: is it possible for an AA member to be too anonymous? Too anonymous for the good of the individual and the Fellowship? The answer is ‘yes.’ And there are more than a few examples of this: members who feel they must not tell their families or their friends or coworkers or doctors or ministers or lawyers that they are members of AA.

There have even been instances when members have sent requests for information to the General Service Office in New York and not included a last name or have sent checks to GSO – unsigned.

There is indeed such a thing as an AA member being too anonymous: where it can mean failure to extend the helping hand when the need arises; where it can mean failure to correct misconceptions about AA both inside and outside the Fellowship; and where it can stifle – even stop – the flow of AA knowledge and sobriety from one person to another.

This is anonymity at the personal level and can indeed be carried too far – in Bill’s words – to ‘the point of real absurdity.’“

It might be a thought to note that “they” made provision for misconceptions early – both inside and outside of the Fellowship. Yes, they exist.

Post from: Blisstree

To The Point Of Real Absurdity

Then, I also thought you were the riddle and the solution was “If you’d only do things my way everything would be okay.” We all know how well that works out.

From today’s Daily Reflection, “A Riddle That Works”

“It may be possible to find explanations of spiritual experiences such as ours, but I have often tried to explain my own and have succeeded only in giving the story of it. I know the feeling it gave me and the results it has brought, but I realize I may never fully understand its deeper why and how.”

And this explains to me exactly why Matt M. didn’t call on me in that meeting at the Talbot House years ago. He knew I thought I had the answer and I was about to spew it all over these less than me because I was soooo smart.

As the reading goes on to say, “I believe a power greater than myself chose me to recover, yet I do not know why. I try not to worry or wonder about what I do not know; instead, I trust that if I continue to work the Steps, practice the A.A. principles in my life, and share my story, I will be guided lovingly toward a deep and mature spirituality in which more will be revealed to me. For the time being, it is a gift for me to trust God, work the Steps and help others.”

Thanks Matt for keeping it real for me and for all you gave me. May you forever rest in peace.

Post from: Blisstree

I Thought I Was The Riddle

The Cuckoo Clock

“Shortly after I got married, I was invited out for a “night out with the boys.” I told the wife that I would be home by midnight… I Promise!

Well, the yarns were being spun and the grog was going down easy, and at around 3 am, drunk as a skunk, I went home. Just as I got in the door, the cuckoo clock started, and cuckooed 3 times. Quickly, I realized she’d probably wake up, so I cuckooed another 9 times.

I was really proud of myself for having the presence of mind, even when smashed, to escape a possible conflict. Next morning the wife asked me what time I got in. I told her 12 o’clock.

“Oh”, she said, “that’s nice”. Whew! Got away with that one!

Then she told me that we needed a new cuckoo clock. When I asked why, she said, “Well, at 3 o’clock, it cuckooed 3 times, then cuckooed another 4 times, cleared its throat, cuckooed another 3 times, farted, then cuckooed twice more and then started giggling.”

Post from: Blisstree

The Cuckoo Clock

‘How to find AA’ in England, Scotland and Wales, UK.

There’s a searchable database of meetings for England, Scotland and Wales.

And a complete list of AA events happening between now and April of next year.

Plus – the National Helpline Number:- 0845 76 97 555

Post from: Blisstree

AA In The UK

Consider one simple thought – they don’t see time, time sober. They begin to hear that but did you understand it in the beginning? Most of these folks sitting in their first few meetings (at least in our area) don’t even understand that we practice abstaining from drinking alcohol much less recognize what we’re about. What they see is a room full of unknown faces with unknown quantity/quality. That’s all.

So we tell them they’re the most important person in the room? Important relative to what? In what manner are they important? How do they understand their importance? Heck, they probably came in believing they were better than us anyway. After all, aren’t we the dregs of the earth and now they’re sitting with us? How does it feel to have the lowest of low tell you your the most important of the lowest of low?

They hear “Steps,” “Sponsor,” “One Day at a Time,” “Don’t Drink and Go To Meetings,” etc. Steps? At your first meeting did you know what the Steps were? Did you care? At your first meeting did you know what a sponsor was? Did you care? At your first meeting did “One Day at a Time” make any sense to you? Did you care? At your first few meetings, when you heard “Don’t drink and go to meetings,” did you wonder how the hell you were not going to drink?

Were you really in a frame of mind that being told you were the most important person in the room made a difference to you? Or were you more PO’d that you might be about to lose the one thing that was always there for you when you wanted your pain to go away?

Did you understand your desperation sitting in your first meeting? Did you have any clue that you had a disease that is permanent, progressive and fatal not to mention the most patient bast*** on the planet? Or were you shaking from withdrawals? Were you wondering how the hell am I going to quit drinking? What are these people talking about? How much do you really remember from that first meeting? That you were told you were the most important person in the room?

And then, months later we tell you that unless you develop humility you won’t stay sober. Geeesh.

Bill W. had some clue about this before the Traditions were even written. In January of 1946 he said;

“In a spiritual sense, anonymity amounts to the renunciation of personal prestige as an instrument of national policy.”

Yes, I realize he brought “national policy” into it and I don’t understand that. I think it is more important that he knew that what was truly important in a society based on anonymity was the renunciation of personal prestige. Perhaps that is why, when they eventually got around to the Traditions they spoke of avoiding allowing prestige to divert us from our primary purpose…

“Nearly everyone of us had wished to do great good, perform great deeds, and embody great ideals. We are all perfectionists who, failing perfection, have gone to the other extreme and settled for the bottle and the blackout.”

Here’s my “NO” vote for prestige and applause. It wasn’t right for Bill Wilson, isn’t right for me and ought not be right for newcomers.

Post from: Blisstree

What Are We Telling The Newcomer?