Prayers in the Big Book Prior to the Stories

[page:paragraph]

12:6
For a brief moment, I had needed and wanted God. There had been a humble willingness to have Him with me – and He came.

13:2
There I humbly offered myself to God, as I then understood Him, to do with me as He would. I placed myself unreservedly under His care and direction. I admitted for the first time that of myself I was nothing; that without Him I was lost.

13:4
I was to sit quietly when in doubt, asking only for direction and strength to meet my problems as He would have me. Never was I to pray for myself, except as my requests bore on my usefulness to others.

63:2
God, I offer myself to thee – to build with me and to do with me as Thou wilt. Relieve me of the bondage of self, that I may better do Thy will. Take away my difficulties, that victory over them may bear witness to those I would help of Thy Power, Thy Love, and Thy Way of life. May I do Thy will always!

67:0
We asked God to help us show them the same tolerance, pity, and patience that we would cheerfully grant a sick friend. When a person offended we said to ourselves, “This is a sick man. How can I be helpful to him? God save me from being angry. Thy will be done.”

68:3
We ask Him to remove our fear and direct our attention to what He would have us be.

69:2
We ask God to mold our [sex] ideals and help us to live up to them.

69:3
In meditation, we ask God what we should do about each specific matter [sex harms].

70:2
We earnestly pray for the right [sex] ideal, for guidance in each questionable situation, for sanity and for the strength to do the right thing.

75:3
We thank God from the bottom of our heart that we know Him better.

75:3
Carefully reading the first five proposals we ask if we have omitted anything, for we are building an arch through which we shall walk a free man at last. Is our work solid so far? Are the stones properly in place? Have we skimped on the cement put into the foundation? Have we tried to make mortar without sand?

76:1
If we still cling to something we will not let go [shortcomings], we ask God to help us be willing.

76:2
My Creator, I am now willing that You should have all of me, good and bad. I pray that You now remove from me every single defect of character which stands in the way of my usefulness to You and my fellows. Grant me strength, as I go out from here, to do Your bidding. Amen.

76:3
We attempt to sweep away the debris which has accumulated out of our effort to live on self- will and run the show ourselves. If we haven’t the will to do this, we ask until it comes [making amends].

79:1
Reminding ourselves that we have decided to go to any lengths to find a spiritual experience, we ask that we be given strength and direction to do the right thing, no matter what the personal consequences may be [making amends].

82:1
It may be that both [you & you significant other] will decide that the way of good sense and loving kindness is to let by-gones be by-gones [no direct amends]. Each might pray about it, having the other one’s happiness uppermost in mind.

83:1
So we clean house with the family, asking each morning in meditation that our Creator show us the way of patience, tolerance, kindness and love.

84:2
When these crop up [selfishness, dishonesty, resentment and fear], we ask God at once to remove them.

85:1
How can I best serve Thee – Thy will (not mine) be done.

86:1
After making our (nightly) review we ask God’s forgiveness and inquire what corrective measures should be taken.

86:2
Before we begin (meditation), we ask God to direct our thinking, especially asking that it be divorced from self-pity, dishonest or self-seeking motives.

86:3
[Facing indecision] Here we ask God for inspiration, an intuitive thought or a decision. We relax and take it easy. We don’t struggle.

87:1
We usually conclude the period of meditation with a prayer that we be shown all through the day what our next step is to be, that we be given whatever we need to take care of such problems. We ask especially for freedom from self-will, and are careful to make no request for ourselves only. We may ask for ourselves, however, if others will be helped. We are careful never to pray for our own selfish ends.

87:3
As we go through the day we pause, when agitated or doubtful, and ask for the right thought or action. We constantly remind ourselves we are no longer running the show, humbly saying to ourselves may times each day, “Thy will be done.”

158:2
On the third day the lawyer gave his life to the care and direction of his Creator, and said he was perfectly willing to do anything necessary.

164:2
Ask Him in your morning meditation what you can do each day for the man who is still sick.

Post from: Blisstree

Big Book Prayers

How Bill W. explained what was meant by the saying that
“A.A. is a SELFISH program.”

…. Another correspondent complained directly that he had been ‘disturbed to hear some A.A. speakers say, ‘A.A. is a selfish program.’” The co-founder’s response was eventually published in “The A.A. Way of Life”:

I can see why you are disturbed…. The word ’selfish’ ordinarily implies that one is acquisitive, demanding, and thoughtless of the welfare of others. Of course, the A.A. way of life does not at all imply such undesirable traits.

What do these speakers mean? Well, any theologian will tell you that the salvation of his own soul is the highest vocation that a man can have. Without salvation – however we may define this – he will have little or nothing. For us in A.A. there is even more urgency.

If we cannot or will not achieve sobriety, then we become truly lost, right in the here and now. We are of no value to anyone, including ourselves, until we find salvation from alcohol. Therefore, our own recovery and spiritual growth have to come first – a right and necessary kind of self-concern.

[From "Not-God, A History of Alcoholics Anonymous", pp. 243-244, by Ernest Kurtz.]

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AA – Selfish Program?

The Journey To Alcoholics Anonymous

Yes, I know… I was informed by my ex while I watched My Name Is Bill W for the first time that I had refused to watch that movie when I was drinking. So those who may be deep in denial as I was probably won’t want to “see” this but here it is anyway…

I never know when I might “plant the seed.” Plus, I’d tell you the same thing James Lipscomb says in his review of “My Name Is Bill W.”

“Watch this movie. Listen to its message of hope, of truth, of honesty, openness, and willingness. Hear the story of the damned, who somehow, someway, found salvation.

You will be moved. I promise you.”

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The Journey To Alcoholics Anonymous

The Language of the Heart: Bill W’s Grapevine Writings

“We, who are the older members of AA, bequeath to you who are younger, these three Legacies – the Twelve Steps of recovery, the Twelve Traditions, and now the general services of Alcoholics Anonymous. Two of these Legacies have long been in your keeping. By the Twelve Steps we have recovered from alcoholism; by the Twelve Traditions we are achieving a fine unity.

Being someday perishable, Dr. Bob and I now wish to deliver to the members of AA their Third Legacy. Since 1938 we and our friends have been holding it in trust. This legacy is the general Headquarters services of Alcoholics Anonymous – the Alcoholic Foundation, the AA Book, the AA Grapevine, and the AA General Office. These are the principal services which have enabled our Society to function and to grow.

Acting on behalf of all, Dr. Bob and I ask that you – the members of AA – now assume guidance of these services and guard them well. The future growth, indeed the very survival, of Alcoholics Anonymous may one day depend on how prudently these arms of service are administered in years to come.”

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Your Third Legacy

“Joe McQ. from Little Rock, Arkansas, of the original Joe and Charlie Big Book Studies, moved on to another life October 25, 2007. You are invited to leave a message in his Memorial Book for his family.”

Joe’s funeral will be Thursday, Nov. 1st, 2007, 11 A.M. at the Pulaski Height United Methodist Church.

History of Joe & Charlie Big Book Studies

“Joe McQ. & Charlie P. met in 1973 when Joe introduced Charlie as the AA speaker at an Al-Anon Convention. Joe had wondered if Charlie might be the country-western singer Charlie Pride. “He wasn’t even the right color,” Joe laments. They instantly discovered their mutual fascination with AA’s basic text “The Big Book”. What interested them most was that The Big Book was written in a particular sequence to convey certain ideas. That interest began a close friendship which has lasted to this day. They would frequently meet to discuss the book, often driving 225 miles to meet in each other’s homes.

Soon they were planning meetings in hotel rooms at AA conventions in Oklahoma and Arkansas, and within a few years, the meetings grew in popularity. In 1977, some members met in a Tulsa, OK hotel room for a discussion of the Big Book. One asked Joe & Charlie to come to his home group to present a program on the book. An AA taper made a four tape set of
their presentation and called it “The Big Book Study”. The tapes were gradually circulated throughout the fellowship and invitations were received for Joe & Charlie to present the study at AA conventions, roundups and special events. By 1980, there had been about eight studies offered.

At the 1980 International AA Convention in New Orleans, Westly P. an impassioned Big Booker from Pompano Beach, Florida, organized a lunch for 1,500 AAs from all over the world and gave away 100 Joe & Charlie tape sets as door prizes. Invitations exploded and within a couple of years, Joe & Charlie were presenting about 36 studies a year worldwide. Obviously, the seminars struck a deep chord within AA members … for the reaffirmation of “this message” as written in April 1939 with the publication of the first edition of Alcoholics Anonymous.

Studies have been given in 48 states and most Canadian provinces. Additionally, Australia, New Zealand, England, Scotland, Ireland, Germany, Switzerland, Sweden and the Netherlands have all hosted the Big Book Study seminars with Joe & Charlie.

The original Joe McQ. has had to curtail his travels in recent years. Oddly enough, another Joe — Joe McC., active in the study group since the beginning — has been able to pick up the slack. “Where God guides, God provides,” as some members say.

All this growth has not come without a measure of turbulence. What spiritual journey does not encounter obstacles? Some fellow AAs have termed the duo, “self-appointed gurus”. Others have accused them of making money on these weekends. Actually, only travel expenses, meals and lodging are paid for by the independent AA host committee sponsoring the study. This is in accordance with the AA Guidelines for Conferences and Conventions (MG4), published by the General Service Office. Since 1977, an estimated 200,000 AA Members have experienced the spiritual benefits of these collective studies.”

[Offered by Bill Lash at the AA History Lovers Group at Yahoo!. Thanks Bill]

Post from: Blisstree

Joe McQ

Humility

“Perpetual quietness of heart. It is to have no trouble. It is never to be fretted or vexed, irritable or sore; to wonder at nothing that is done to me, to feel nothing done against me.”

“It is to be at rest when nobody praises me, and when I am blamed or despised, it is to have a blessed home in myself where I can go in and shut the door and pray to my Father in secret and be at peace, as in a deep sea of calmness, when all around and about is seeming trouble.”

I don’t know if this is still there, but the copy I found says that this was from the Office of Robert Holbrook Smith, MD, 928 Second National Building, Akron, Ohio.

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From The Desk of Dr. Bob

Those that have interested me the most – from Silkworth.net, written by Milton A. Maxwell, Ph.D., Assistant Professor of Sociology, State College of Washington, Pullman, Washington and compiled by Jim B.;

“Strong efforts were made in the Washingtonian movement to minimize sectarian, theological and political differences, but the movement did not avoid attracting to itself the hostile emotions generated by these conflicts.”

“… at their best, the Washingtonian groups possessed no understanding of alcoholism other than the possibility of recovery through love and sympathy.”

“Their approach to the problem of alcoholism and alcohol was moralistic rather than psychological or therapeutic. They possessed no program for personality change.”

“The group had no resource of ideas to help them rise above the ideational content locally possessed. Except for their program of mutual aid they had no pattern of organization or activity different from existing patterns. There was far too great a reliance upon the pledge, and not enough appreciation of other elements in their program.”

“Work with other alcoholics was not required, nor was the therapeutic value of this work explicitly recognized. There was no anonymity to keep the public from becoming aware of broken pledges, or to keep individuals from exploiting the movement for prestige and fame.”

“A comparison with the Washingtonian experience underscores the sheer survival value of the principle of anonymity in Alcoholics Anonymous… the opponents of the Washingtonian movement seized upon [anonymity lapses] with glee and made the most of it to hurt … the movement.”

“A decided Washingtonian weakness was its general lack of follow-through. In contrast, A.A. is particularly strong on this point, providing a potent follow-through in a group setting where self-analysis and catharsis are stimulated; where new attitudes toward alcohol, self and others are learned; where the feeling tones are modified through a new quality of relationships; where, in short, a new way of life is acquired – one which not only enables the person to interact with his environment (particularly with other persons) without the use of alcohol, but enables him to do so on a more mature, satisfying basis.”

Finally, from the Wikipedia: “The Washingtonians drifted away from their initial purpose of helping the individual alcoholic. Disagreements, controversies and infighting destroyed what was at one time a beneficial resource to the problem drinker, and their good work perished in the swirl of controversy over temperance and prohibition. Their successes, which might have been advanced to treat untold thousands of alcoholics, perished along with them.”

Are we paying attention?

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Washingtonian Weaknesses

Learning To Love Ourselves

“Alcoholism was a lonely business, even though we were surrounded by people who loved us…. We were trying to find emotional security either by dominating or by being dependent on others…. We still vainly tried to be secure by some unhealthy sort of domination or dependence.” As Bill Sees It, pg 252

Ego-maniac with an inferiority complex.

This time, the person who has responded says “It was through staying sober, having a good sponsor and working the Twelve Steps that I was able to build up my low self-esteem. First the Twelve Steps taught me to become my own best friend, and then, when I was able to love myself, I could reach out and love others.”

Self-hatred and self-loathing are incredibly heavy burdens to carry, speaking from personal experience. When others try to add to the weight, it not only simply adds to the weight it doubles or triples if those who are doing the adding are loved ones. Why are they adding? Because we are on a merry-go-round of doing emotional harm to them. I.E. we bring it on ourselves. Therefore, as this respondent mentions “I drank to dull the emotional pain.”

It took many years for my emotional pain to gather, all the while never ebbing because of my drinking. Even after years in recovery (despite what some might say) I’m far from a finished product and that is just fine the way it is, for me. I have no need for perfection today. I’m happy with me personally. And, if you don’t like it, well, I guess you’ll stay on your merry bandwagon spewing endlessly won’t you? I don’t have to drink today – and that is the miracle! (once again, despite judgment to the contrary)

Post from: Blisstree

Staying Teachable

Honesty

“Over and over we must ask ourselves, “Is it true or is it false?” For honesty is the eternal search for truth. It is by far the most difficult of the four Absolutes, for anyone, but especially for us in this fellowship. The problem drinker develops genuine artistry in deceit. Too many (and we plead guilty) simply turn over a new leaf and relax. That is wrong. The real virtue in honesty lies in the persistent dedicated striving for it. There is no relaxed twilight zone, it’s either full speed ahead constantly or it’s not honesty we seek. And the unrelenting pursuit of truth will set you free, even if you don’t quite catch up to it. We need not choose or pursue falsity. All we need is to relax our pursuit of truth, and falsity will find us.”

Just felt appropriate…

Post from: Blisstree

Absolute Honesty

A Writing on AA and the Higher Power

God In His wisdom, selected this group of men and women to be the purveyors of his goodness. In selecting them, through whom to bring about this phenomenon, He went not to the proud, the mighty, the famous, or the brilliant; He went to the humble, the sick, the unfortunate; He went right to the drunkard, the so-called weakling of the world.

Well might He have said to us:

“Unto your weak and feeble hands, I have entrusted a power beyond estimate. To you has been given that which has been denied the most learned of your fellows. Not to scientists or statesmen, not to wives or mothers, not even to My priests or ministers, have I given this gift of healing other alcoholics which I entrust to you.

It must be used unselfishly; it carries with it grave responsibility. No day can be too long; no demands upon your time can be too urgent; no case too pitiful; no task to hard; no effort too great. It must be used with tolerance, for I have restricted its application to no race, no creed, and no denomination. Personal criticism you must expect; lack of appreciation will be common; ridicule will be your lot; your motives will be misjudged. You must be prepared for adversity, for what men call adversity is the ladder you must use to ascend the rungs toward spiritual perfection, and, remember – in the exercise of this power, I shall not exact of you beyond your capabilities.

You are not selected because of your exceptional talents, and be careful, always, if success attends your efforts, not to ascribe to personal superiority that to which you can lay claim only by virtue of My gift. If I had wanted learned men to accomplish this mission, the power would have been entrusted to the physician and the scientist. If I had wanted eloquent men, there would have been many anxious for the assignment, for talk is the easiest used of all talents with which I have endowed mankind. If I had wanted scholarly men, the world is filled with better qualified men than you, who would be available.

You were selected because you have been the outcasts of the world and your long experience as drunkards has made or should make you humbly alert to the cries of distress that come from the lonely hearts of alcoholics everywhere.

Keep ever in mind the admission you made on the day of your profession in A.A., namely that you are powerless and that it was only with your willingness to turn your life and will unto My keeping that relief came to you.”

Makes a few things more clear – for me…

[Edited: For the heck of it, this evening I Googled "We Are Chosen" without the quotes and discovered this page at The Orange Papers. (If you are not familiar with The Orange Papers be prepared before you go there. This author is quite vitriolic towards Alcoholics Anonymous). What was posted above apparently was excerpted from an address given by Judge John T. at the 4th Anniversary of the Chicago Group on October 5, 1943.]

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AA And The Higher Power