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Spanking can get kids to behave in a hurry, but new research suggests it can do more harm than good to their noggins. The study, involving hundreds of U.S. children, showed the more a child was spanked, the lower his or her IQ compared with others.

“All parents want smart children,” said study researcher Murray Straus of the University of New Hampshire. “This research shows that avoiding spanking and correcting misbehavior in other ways can help that happen.”

First I don’t really agree with this statement, I was spanked as a child as was so many others from my generation and generations before me. Are we all stupid? Some of those that are stating this were probably even spanked, but they are labeled brilliant or at least as sources that can make statements as this. Why do I feel so strongly?

While I don’t agree that parents should beat their child I believe there are circumstances. What about the neighbor child that backhanded his mom the other day because he simply didn’t like her stating something? Or what about the boy that stabbed another kid with a pencil because he wouldn’t share the glue?  Another incident might be a 10 year old telling his mom he was going out, she replied “be back before the lights go on.” His response was, “or what mom. We’ll talk?” I witnessed most of the above (not the child stabbing) in the past few years and I must say I was shocked. Have our children become this disrespectful to adults. The answer is, most have. These days we are told don’t spank a child, instead talk to them calmly about what they did wrong and hope it never happens again. 

I think the word “Spanked” should definitely be defined in this case.

Spanking:  the act of slapping on the buttocks
Smack: the act of smacking something; a blow delivered with an open hand
Beat: hit repeatedly

I remember hearing stories of kids being hit with “ugly bats,” belts, fly swatters or even wooden spoons. Today those children are still smart, they grew up and did just the opposite of those parents. They don’t have lower IQs in fact some are smarter than the rest, granted they will probably never strike a child I still don’t think the “spanking” makes the lower IQ.

LA Times quoted:

The relationship between spanking and intelligence is found in children around the world, said the lead author of the study, University of New Hampshire professor Murray Straus. Children in the United States who were spanked had lower IQs — by 2.8 to 5 points — than those who were not spanked, Straus found.

Straus studied 806 children ages 2 to 4 and 704 ages 5 to 9. Both groups were retested four years later. How often parents spanked influenced IQ score. “The more spanking, the slower the development of the child’s mental ability,” Straus said in a news release. “But even small amounts of spanking made a difference.”

Straus and his colleagues looked at corporal punishment practices in 32 countries by surveying 17,404 university students. The analysis found a lower average IQ in nations in which spanking was more prevalent. The strongest link between corporal punishment and IQ was for those whose parents continued to use corporal punishment even when they were teenagers.

  A lower IQ could be a variety of things:
-  born that way (maybe mom and dad weren’t a genius)
-  not shown love
-  lack of proper nutrition
-  kept in the dark
-  treated invisible
-  treated as if they were dumb

I have read comments on another blog today where the person stated, “Could it not be that the person with the higher IQ was just always well-behaved?”  This brings up a very interesting thought. But back to spanking, yes, spanking hurts and should definitely be a last resort. But I do NOT think it will lower the IQ of a child…at least not alone. What do you think? Before you answer, were you spanked as a child and have a lower IQ than most? Watch the video below:

Post from: Blisstree

Does Spanking Cause Lower IQs?

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“When I saw that, I couldn’t take it. I had to do something.”

X-17 does state that the older woman was actually hitting the toddler on the chest as he cried. That I believe is uncalled for, unless the child is not breathing at which point it would be CPR needed not a beating.

So here’s the question, assumming the mother/granny/caregiver was actually beating the child on the chest, was Liv in the right? I mean what would you do? Most people would turn a blind eye and continue, it took guts for Liv to do this.

Now if the woman was just yelling at the child, would it have been okay for Liv to go up and yell at the lady? Have you ever approached someone doing something to a chlid?

Post from: Blisstree

When Do You Offer Other Parents Advice?

I’ve been following the Rihanna/Chris Brown “alleged” physical violence situation. What she’s doing, going back to an “alleged” abuser, it’s sadly stereotypical. I’ve read quotes from people who know both Rihanna and Chris Brown, read that Diddy offered up his home for the two to reconcile, read that her father feels he can’t get through to her, but he’s supporting her.

I’ve also read that one of her sponsors is thinking about dropping her because they are uncomfortable with the way she is handling the situation.  I know that I, for one, bought a certain mascara just because it enhanced her eyes (mine are similarly colored). It’s possible that she’s broken, but she is still a lovely girl.  Getting abused doesn’t mean she should be kept from making a living.

It’s easy to sit in judgment of a situation when you are on the outside. I’d never stay with an abusive partner, you might say.  Personally, after my experience, I wish she’d be done with him, too, but I realize that it’s not that easy.  It wasn’t easy for my mom. When my brother’s dad said that he would not do it again, she believed him. He lied.

My girls have both heard about what is going on. They were big Chris Brown fans before, only one was a Rihanna fan. Kids talk and they don’t always get the correct information. I’ve tried to talk to the girls about abuse , about how it can happen in romantic relationships with teens, as well as adults. Bailey, my older daughter, related a story about her friend who is in an abusive relationship.

I’ve spent a lot of my children’s life alone, in large part because my experience was that men hit and I did not want my family hurt. I know that not all men hit, but growing up the way that I did, it’s messed with my head a bit. I recognize this and try to fight that screwy point of view.

I want my girls to be aware, but not paranoid. I want to show a balanced point of view, but sometimes it’s a struggle. I want my girls to recognize the warning signs. I don’t ever want my beautiful girls to look like Rihanna did in that horrible photo with the heartbroken look and the bruises.

If you are a parent, have you found yourself talking to your kids about the Rihanna/Chris Brown situation?

Image credit: All Posters.com

Post from: Blisstree

Talking To Kids About Physical Violence

Stern is charged, of course, with being part of a ring of conspiracy. He’s suspected of helping Anna Nicole become more and more addicted to drugs so that he could possibly get her money. But what if Anna Nicole was just a regular girl?

I couldn’t help but wonder what would happen if enabling became a crime all around. Not just for famous people. Not just for the wealthy, but for everyday folks where drugs and alcohol cause the breakdown of their family.

What if all the mothers out there who not only support their husband’s drinking but become a part of the abuse they direct toward their children received the same fate as Howard Stern? What if the fathers of the world could actually be charged with covering up behavior when the mother of their children went on tirades so big that broken dishes and scared children were the only thing left standing at the end?

What if?

Image: Newscom

Post from: Blisstree

What If Enabling Was a Crime?

A nanny has been arrested after the parents of a 2-year-old boy recorded her molesting the tot, authorities said yesterday.

The parents, who live on Long Island, were first alerted to a possible problem by an official at their boy’s preschool, who said Carol Clarke, 45, of Queens, was routinely rough with him.

They set up a secret recording device in their home early last year and viewed four instances of sexual abuse, cops said.

How horrible!  I can’t imagine the strength it took for these parents to not wipe the floor with her.

I do hope she gets what she has coming!

source

Post from: Blisstree

Nanny-Cam Abuse Bust