Deciding to place a family member in a nursing home constitutes a big decision for families and for that person.  Then researching and choosing a place can be overwhelming, too.
I knew, when I moved my mom from her home 275 miles to ours, that eventually I’d have to place her in a nursing home. Since I’d been through this with my aunt’s care, I realized that, at some point, caring for Mother would be more than I could manage.
So I began researching before I moved her.  I located a nearby nursing home that, fortunately for Mother and me, had daycare facilities …read more

Mixing medications, forgetting what to take when, or having insufficient knowledge about why one is taking a specific prescription becomes a challenge with Alzheimer’s patients and sometimes their caregivers.  If you have questions about prescription use, perhaps you’ll find these guidelines helpful:
Guidelines for Managing Medications and Prescriptions at AgingCare.com
Do you have suggestions on helping the Alzheimer’s patient in your family manage meds?  What works for you and them?
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When one receives a diagnosis of Alzheimer’s, how does he/she learn to live with it?  How do family members learn to cope? 
My aunt was diagnosed before I became involved in her care.  When I would see her, she’d mention it, but didn’t seem to let it get her down.  However, I didn’t see her that often at that stage in her life.  Also, not so much was known about Alzheimer’s in the 1980s, so she may not have realized what was ahead for her.
I don’t think my mom ever realized she had developed Alzheimer’s.  She was more concerned about finding …read more

Edie Dykeman, at Elder Care Cafe, mentions Alzheimer’s Notes and comments:
Many times, once someone’s caregiving time is finished, they choose to move on. Mary Emma has returned to help the rest of us along.
Some people have asked me, “Why?” when so many caregivers and Alzheimer’s family members choose move on.
I want to reiterate:  First…it’s okay to move on.  Second…I’m not stuck in the past.
As Edie has glimpsed, I chose, through my writing and speaking, to remain involved and help those who are still going through caregiving.  When Mother and Auntie developed Alzheimer’s (Auntie first in the 1980s and then Mother while caring for her sister in the early 1990s), …read more

 Edie Dykeman, at ElderCareCafe, responded to my post,  Keeping Your Cool as an Alzheimer’s Caregiver , with, Great post and reminder to do what we can to stay calm and emotionally in control. Thanks!  She also described a situation in her caregiving life that you might relate to.
As I mentoned to Edie, it is difficult living day to day with someone who has Alzheimer’s and can be very stubborn. They’re also often frightened by what’s happening to them, so strike out verbally and physically at those closest.  That often is the caregiver.
When I was caring for Mother, I read somewhere that …read more

Often caregivers feel isolated and think they’re alone in facing the challenges of caring for a family member, especially one with Alzheimer’s or some form of dementia.  Even if there is a caregivers’ support group in their community, it’s not always easy to get away to attend meetings.
Online communities have become a boon to caregivers, where they can meet with others online who are having similar challenges.
Forgetful Not Forgotten is a community that’s evolving out of the film of the same name, by Chris Wynn about his father’s experience.  In this community you’ll be able to share your experiences and gain …read more

As caregivers, we often have a way of making ourselves feel guilty, regretful and inadequate.  Or we let others cause us to think we’re not doing the best job we can  (when they shirk the caregiver tasks themselves).
We’re usually thrown into caregiving without training or often advance warning.  Later we might wish we had done some things differently.  But we weren’t to know at the time.  Looking back, I wish I’d known more about Alzheimer’s when Mother and Auntie developed it.  But I never imagined I’d be caring for them. 
Also realize, someone told me, that as an Alzheimer’s caregiver, you …read more

Traveling with an Alzheimer’s family member can be challenging.  It also can provide you with enjoyable and memorable experiences.  This type of travel takes a great deal of patience, too.
At the Alzheimer’s Team blog, read about a Road Trip with Mom and Dad, as described by blogger Krista’s sister Kathy, who took her parents on a two-week trip throughout the Southwest in October to visit family.  Her mom has diabetes and difficulty walking.  Her dad has moderate Alzheimer’s.
Kathy’s patience was rewarded with a memorable trip for her parents and herself, also pleasure for family members they visited.  Perhaps reading Kathy’s journal will give you …read more

Word of Week
Assisted Living – This generally refers to a home where residents are fairly independent, but may need help with medications, cooking, and housekeeping.  By living there, they are in a safe environment, enjoy social activities, and have meals prepared and laundry done.
Some assisted living homes are set up to give more help than others.  Some also have a nursing home on the premises where residents can move as they require more care.  My mother-in-law lived in an assisted living home for four years because she was going blind and couldn’t care for herself alone too well.
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Closet Disease
Keeping one’s illness, when it involved mental or emotional conditions, “in the closet” was common when I was growing up.  You only whispered about someone’s mental disorders.  Families tried to keep that person at home, while not literally “in a closet,” figuratively so.
You tried not to talk about Aunt Mollie who laughed at inappropriate times, wore her clothes backward, took walks in the middle of the night, or held conversations with people of the past.  Perhaps she even had to spend some time in a mental institution and have “shock” treatment, the common way of dealing with mental and …read more