Guidelines for Managing Medications and Prescriptions at AgingCare.com

Do you have suggestions on helping the Alzheimer’s patient in your family manage meds?  What works for you and them?

(Amazon image)

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Prescription Guidelines for Alzheimer’s Patients

My guest post at Susan Gunelius’ Women on Business blog gives you 10 Tips On Finding Time for Your Home Business.

Whether you’re balancing a home business with caregiving or considering doing this, I hope you find these tips helpful.

(Amazon image)

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Mary Emma Writes Guest Post at Women On Business Blog

My aunt was diagnosed before I became involved in her care.  When I would see her, she’d mention it, but didn’t seem to let it get her down.  However, I didn’t see her that often at that stage in her life.  Also, not so much was known about Alzheimer’s in the 1980s, so she may not have realized what was ahead for her.

I don’t think my mom ever realized she had developed Alzheimer’s.  She was more concerned about finding a cure for her sister.  Mother’s only comments occasionally, when we were chatting, “Slow down, Emma.  My brain doesn’t work so fast.”

How Does One Cope?

How does one learn to cope and live with Alzheimer’s if they are aware of the diagnosis? 

At Everyday Health.com, you’ll find some suggestions for Learning to Live With an Alzheimer’s Diagnosis that both family caregiver and patient may like to check out.

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How Does One Live With Alzheimer’s

Do you scurry around making school lunches

I’ve written about this topic at my Mary Emma’s Country Kitchen blog, under School Lunch Variations, covering lunches from my mom’s day to the present when my grandchildren take lunch and snacks to school.  There certainly have been changes over the years. 

Perhaps your Alzheimer’s patient will relate and have memories similar to those of my mom’s or mine in a one-room schoolhouse.

You’ll also find a recipe for Mayonnaise Cake, something we made often during my childhood for dessert at home and a lunch box special.

What do you do so lunch box time isn’t so mundane and a frantic rush? 

(Ghirardelli Chocolate image at Amazon)

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Lunch Time for Tots, Caregivers, & Alzheimer’s Patients

Many times, once someone’s caregiving time is finished, they choose to move on. Mary Emma has returned to help the rest of us along.

Some people have asked me, “Why?” when so many caregivers and Alzheimer’s family members choose move on.

I want to reiterate:  First…it’s okay to move on.  Second…I’m not stuck in the past.

As Edie has glimpsed, I chose, through my writing and speaking, to remain involved and help those who are still going through caregiving.  When Mother and Auntie developed Alzheimer’s (Auntie first in the 1980s and then Mother while caring for her sister in the early 1990s), there weren’t many resources for the caregiver.

The Internet wasn’t in common use; caregiver support groups were few and far between; there weren’t too many books about Alzheimer’s and caregiving.  Also, people didn’t like to talk about the disease nor admit that a family member had developed it.

My neighbor was caregiver for her great aunt, so she and I would chat and compare situations.  By this time her Aunt Dot was in a nursing home, as was Auntie. But our sharing definitely helped me cope and even find humor midst the frustrations of caring for Mother.  I hope it helped Linda, too.

So I feel the need to help and encourage others.  It’s also become for me a way I can leave a legacy of caring from Mother and Auntie.  They were ladies who cared for others.  This way, their journeys through Alzheimer’s weren’t in vain.  They are still helping others!

Mother also encouraged me with my writing (a gift I inherited from her father).  So she would be pleased to know I’m using this talent to help others.

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Why Do I Still Write & Speak About Alzheimer’s?

As I mentoned to Edie, it is difficult living day to day with someone who has Alzheimer’s and can be very stubborn. They’re also often frightened by what’s happening to them, so strike out verbally and physically at those closest.  That often is the caregiver.

When I was caring for Mother, I read somewhere that you could end up becoming very angry at that person and had to be careful you didn’t harm them physically. “No never,” I thought. “She’s my mother.”

However, as the tiredness and frustrations grew, I began to understand what the author meant. I had to learn to laugh, to joke with Mother, and make an attempt to stay calm. I also realized I must get away from the caregiving at times and have space for myself.  I had to learn not to take what Mother said and did personally because she often didn’t know it was ME she was venting her frustrations on.

How have you learned to cope when caregiving seems too much?

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When Caregiving Becomes Too Much

When you’re tired (getting adequate sleep as a full time caregiver becomes challenging), juggling many roles (especially if you’re a mom as well as cargiver) and taking care of a home, possibly even working outside, frustrations come to the foreground more easily.  So leaning to keep your cook becomes important so that you don’t fall into the abuse trap.

A British study reveals that Many Alzheimer’s Caregivers Admit to Abusive Behavior.  This generally was verbal abuse rather than the physical type.  Yelling, swearing, threatening and screaming insults were some reported that the caregivers wished they hadn’t done afterward, but in the frustration of the moment did.

Similar studies have not been done in the United States, according to the article.  So the incidence of abuse is known to a lesser degree.   

If you need suggestions on how to deal with this situation:

• Check with a local Alzheimer’s support group in your area. 
• Find ways to care for yourself and eleviate your stress. 
• Find time for yourself away from the caregiving situation. 
• Don’t feel you’re the only one who can care for the Alzheimer’s patient.
• Look for small joys.
• Learn to laugh at the situatiions…with the Alzheimer’s patient and with your family.

What have you found that works?

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Keeping Your Cool as an Alzheimer’s Caregiver

Yes, often if you talk with your Alzheimer’s family member about places, persons, things and events, they will remember more. These may be bits and pieces of memories that you’ll enjoy jotting down or recording for family history, too.  Sometimes they will be lengthy stories.  You also may find that the Alzheimer’s patient thinks he/she is back in that memory world.

Also, pull out some pictures, either actual family photos or simply pictures in magazines. These often will jog memories and initiate conversations.

I learned to enjoy my “memory trips” with Mother and Auntie.  When Mother’s memory was still accurate, I write down much of what she was telling me so that I could share with my family and record for our family legacy.

(Incidentally….visit Krista’s Alzheimer’s Team blog.  You’ll find comfort and encouragement as she and others share with you the tears and laughter, frustrations and joys of caring for someone with Alzheimer’s.)

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Helping Your Alzheimer’s Patient Create Memories

Online communities have become a boon to caregivers, where they can meet with others online who are having similar challenges.

Forgetful Not Forgotten is a community that’s evolving out of the film of the same name, by Chris Wynn about his father’s experience.  In this community you’ll be able to share your experiences and gain encouragement from others.

The movie, Forgetful Not Forgotten, premieres January 11 on TVO.  You also can see excerpts of the film at the Forgetful Not Forgotten site (link above).

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Canadian Community for Caregivers

Also realize, someone told me, that as an Alzheimer’s caregiver, you always have a second chance…often within five minutes.  Even though the patient may be upset with you, he/she usually forgets it a short time later.  They are onto another activity or place in their lives…past or present.  Realize that their irritation often isn’t with you but with the frustrating situation they find themselves in.

Do the best you can and relax.  Find humor and joy in the caregiving, too, and pass it on to your family member or patient.

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Alzheimer’s Caregivers – Don’t Beat Yourself Up!