“There can be only one consideration which should qualify our desire for a complete disclosure of the damage we have done. That will arise in the occasional situation where to make a full revelation would seriously harm the one to whom we are making amends. Or – quite as important – other people. We cannot, for example, unload a detailed account of extramarital adventuring upon the shoulders of our unsuspecting wife or husband. And even in those cases where such a matter must be discussed, let’s try to avoid harming third parties, whoever they may be. It does not lighten our burden when we recklessly make the crosses of others heavier.”

I have known those who were heartless, cruel and self-centered in the extreme to the extent that “making amends” in a program of recovery did not take into consideration the lives and feelings of others. Usually these folks are the types who continue to admit they have left things out, important things. They sometimes take the form of those who openly contradict what many would call the majority experience. And… they sound good.

Of course, they eventually do what few of this type escape – they drink again.

Post from: Blisstree

Do Not Make The Crosses Of Others Heavier

First Things First – changing wherever to whenever gives a different meaning…

The Very Spirit;

“The readiness to take the full consequences of our past acts, and to take responsibility for the well-being of others at the same time, is the very spirit of Step Nine.”

Full consequences. Not partial, half, a little bit or just some. Full.

The only exceptions? Cases where our disclosure would cause actual harm.

Not delaying because we are afraid…

“Earnestly asking God’s help and guidance – meanwhile resolving to do the right thing when it becomes clear, cost what it may?”

And – the right thing is clear to you exactly how? Oh, yeah – “lay the matter before our sponsor or spiritual adviser.”

Specific and direct instructions.

Do it!

Post from: Blisstree

Step Nine