Well, mostly figured it out – there are still some things that I don’t get. For example, how do I add friends to a “note” when I do an meme?  I need my girl, Leah, to walk me through it, I suspect.  Leah, she’s one of my two closest girlfriends - I found them both on MySpace.  We were friends the first time, back in the 8th grade.

So far, I have a few old friends and even a couple old boyfriends added to my “friends.”  I love hearing from old boyfriends. I’m not a bitter ex, so I like to hear that they are doing well, see photos of their kids, their wives. It’s not that I’m ridiculously balanced or grounded or mentally healthy – I just don’t feel that we are keeping score.  If an ex goes on to find love and happiness, it does not take anything from me and my accomplishments. There’s enough good to go around for everyone, I think.

My ex-fiance, whom I’ve not seen since….’85 or possibly ‘86, put up photos of himself and his family last week. He was a sweet, blonde, cherub-like, curly-haired boy, back in the day.  Mom has this clear memory of him smelling the scratch-n-sniff stickers that my little brother tacked up to his door. Today, he’s got that hot pirate look going on – tan, shaved head, huge tattoo, earrings. It suits him. Mom said, “Wow. So, manly.” I’m pretty sure that he’s still the type to stop and admire a kid’s scratch-n-sniff stickers. 

I sent a message to another old beau. This one, he’s from way back – the 10th grade, when I was 15.  I wasn’t very good to this boy.  He was just my type – rebellious, lovely skin, great smile, good kisser  – but he had this slow, gentleness to him that I was too young to appreciate at the time.  I’m hoping to hear that this man is doing well, too. I’d like to admire photos of him, his family, maybe his wife, and smile because he’s living a good life.

My computer has brought me so many good things over the years, including a way to earn a living, but absolutely the greatest gift it’s given me is the re-introduction of old friends.  My last love, we found each other through Classmates.com and even though that hasn’t turned out the way that I had hoped, I still wish him the best, and hope to hear from him from time to time. 

How about you – have you ever looked up an old boyfriend on Facebook? How about MySpace or Classmates.com?

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Facebook and Looking For Old Boyfriends

Post from: Blisstree

Another Free eHarmony Weekend

Today, a friend of mine, Eliza, shared this post with me  Ten Dating Red Flags, by Rich Santos over at Marie Claire.  Rich shares some very important relationship points that are equally applicable to men and to women.  

For example:

1.  You Are Not on the VIP List For Breaking News.  Were you the last to learn about this person’s job promotion or newborn niece or nephew?  Once things are serious, you should be among the first to know about exciting news, or bad news.

  OR

3.  The Don’t Make Any Sacrifices. Healthy relationships don’t require bending over backwards all the time, but a certain amount of sacrifice is necessary in a selfless union.  When two of my friends first started dating one another, she demanded that he go to Farm Aid for her birthday, which was also the opening NFL football Sunday.  While all the guys gathered to watch the games, he was sweltering on some field attending Farm Aid-an event he never would have gone to if she hadn’t of invited him.  Now that’s sacrifice.

These points, they are important.  There needs to be some sense of connection, some sense of an ”us” in a long term relationship.  That give and take, it builds trust and security. 

The differences between the sexes can be very deep and mysterious and in some ways that’s good. Too much familiarity can change something sexy into something friend-y, but for the most part, there has to be some common ground, some shared vision of where we are coming from if we are to ever get the next phase in a relationship. It is heartening to learn that men and women are looking for the same things in a relationship. It’s boys vs. girls world. 

I want to understand men.  I want to figure out the man-puzzle, if there is one. I love men and it’s important to me that my daughters learn to enjoy and understand the opposite sex, as well, which is tough when you are growing up in single parent household. My hope for their future is a loving and enduring relationship. It is my hope for your future, too.

Do you have your own version of a red flags list?  Do you have an important piece of the man-puzzle mystery that you’d like to share? 

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Men and Women – Are We Really That Different?

One of the couples who gets a lot of press is Jessica Simpson and Tony Romo. They are in some sort of gossip news every single day – constant quotes from Jessica about how she’s finally truly in love, how he’s the love of her life, how she can be herself with him or whatever. Good for her, I wish her happiness, but do we really need daily updates on this couple? Do you wake up in the morning, grab your computer, and quickly scan the news praying that Tony and Jessica are still in love? Does Jessica Simpson want all this constant relationship buzz out there? What does she think of headlines like Sorry, Cowboys Fans…’Yoko Romo’ Might Be a Permanent Fixture? Does this sell more cds? Does it get her more movie roles? 

I can understand people wanting to work in a creative field, but I can’t understand the need for celebrity, the need for the buzz. I can’t imagine trying to meet and get to know someone with all those eyes on me and  I can’t imagine having to endure a break-up in the spotlight. Who needs that added pressure? Being a normal human being is challenging enough. 

What do you think of the current fascination for celebrity couples? Do you have a celebrity boyfriend? If you do, please tell me, I can keep a secret. <wink>

Post from: Blisstree

Jessica Simpson’s Love Life

Hmmm.

I guess for women who take on this kind of thinking when it comes to relationships are not-so-into monogamy, eh? ‘Does make you think, though. Why is having two boyfriends better than one? Of course, it’s a rip-off of the saying, “Two heads are better than one” and takes on a similar if not the exact, same concept. But they were refering to idea generation during meetings, plannings, or brainstorming sessions.

• Is it because each guy provides something that the other can’t? Is it to reinforce the girl’s attractiveness? Or it’s simply because the girl knows she can have two or more, even?

Perhaps there’s something about getting a taste of different types of “relationships” since the girl will be getting “inputs” from two different guys. Like in meetings, if ideas would come from just one person, the outcome may turn out to be not as exciting as getting ideas from two or more “heads”, to accomplish a goal.

For the girl, the idea of having just one boyfriend seems unsatisfying — quite similar to multi-dating or men having more than one girlfriend. I guess, this kind of thing is not limited to men, huh?

Now, it also peaked my curiosity when it comes to the guy’s side, are there guys who agrees to this kind of a set up? If yes, I’d like to know why. [I want to put an exclamation point at the end of that statement but decided not to --- egad.]

Discuss.

Photo credit: Rico Mossesgeld

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Two Boyfriends Are Better Than One

So, you’ve got a new boyfriend.

What are you planning to do with it? Uh, I mean — him. Teehee.

SuperMasterpiece.com has got some pretty creative tips on how to care for your “new-found friend”.

I particularly liked this bit on potty training,

“Instruct your boyfriend on proper toilet habits. Expect accidents and punish accordingly.”

Heehee. I just had to laugh at that one.

This piece of art is a cool way of giving out handy advice to women who find themselves in new relationships. We all know how tiresome the adjustment period can be so we need all the support we can get!

Go ahead. Click on the image and check it out!

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Caring For Your New Boyfriend

1. If a geek guy says he’s going to call, he will. Major points, sweetie.
2. He can make sure your tech needs are well taken care of. Tell me, who wouldn’t appreciate that?
3. They’re relatively low maintenance. If you can’t cook, you’ll be glad to know that he’ll be equally satisfied with just ordering pizza.
4. His friends aren’t jerks.
5. Rarely are they possessive. They trust you, so, you can be yourself when you’re around them.
6. Most are good at remembering dates. Real attentive, too!
7. You won’t have to worry about him ogling another girl. They’re more concerned with gadgets and PCs. Heehee.
8. You don’t have to worry about what he’s up to when you guys aren’t together. See reason #7.
9. They’re well-educated. Yay for intelligent conversations! ‘Nuff said.
10. And, lastly, you know that they actually CARE about you.

Do you really need me to tell you all these things just to convince you? Hahaha.

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10 Reasons Why Geeks Make Good Boyfriends