Women all around the world have toyed with this question at one point or another in their lives.  Our biggest flaw, perhaps, is that we toy with this question for far too long!  Yes, I too am guilty of procrastinating a break up or two.  “He’s not that bad all the time” or “I’m too comfortable”, are usually my most common road blocks.  And I know that I’m not alone.
So, Rule Number 1 girls, if you’re thinking about breaking up with him, it’s because you want to.

Yes, breaking up is hard to do, but have you ever stayed with somebody …read more

In my previous article I addressed the Definiton of Cheating as a starting point for a discussion about the possible beginning, middle, and end situations that occur in a cheating situation.  Every cheating situation is different, but the main two choices that you have after this occurs are 1. break up or 2. stay together.
Most of the time when you’ve been cheated on you will want to immediately end the relationship that you are in.  If your relationship has been a struggle and you believe that the cheating was only a manifestation of other problems in your relationship like distrust, …read more

Sometimes you find yourself in a relationship that is thisclose to being perfect…but there is just one little thing that you want your partner to change about themselves.  The question of change is a BIG one in relationships.  Are you waiting for someone to change?  Are you staying together because you assume they will change?  Are you trying to change for someone else?
If you are in a relationship where you have asked someone to change something significant about their behavior or personality for you, then you know how difficult it is to move forward after this has occurred.  I’m not …read more

I used to be a big fan of the show Dancing With the Stars. I still enjoy the show and I still love dance, but I was put off by a couple of things. The length of time I had to devote to the show grew longer each season and it bothered me that the judging was so uneven. One of my favorite parts of the show was watching the chemistry build between the dancers and their partners.
The season that Karina Smirnoff danced with Mario Lopez  was so much fun. The audience suspected that something was happening between the two …read more

As a divorced woman, I can honestly tell you that when going through a divorce you are not at your best. It’s like the divorce takes over your brain and there’s no room left for things like rational thought or common sense. I saw a piece today at AOL Health, by Gabrielle Linzer and Christina Parrella, about mistakes that people make while going through a divorce.
Here are a few “slip ups,” that divorcing folk tend to fall into……
*Do not try to entice your ex back by being overly generous when divvying up your assests. I did not fall into this one …read more

This Summer has been the Summer of My Daughter’s Broken Heart. She’s experienced periodic break-ups and make-ups with her boyfriend of just under a year. He lived with us for six months, when his mom turned him out, so sometimes my feelings about the kids get a little colored by position as mother (or substitute mother) to  both of them.
At this point, however, I’m clearly all-in on the Bay side.  The kid is in agony, grieving her lost love, and sad. She started school this week and is still in constant contact with him via cell phone or the computer.
Here’s a purely selfish thought …read more

I’ve always heard a lot about closure. A person will say they “need closure” or someone will advise another person to “get closure.” I thought it was a load of BS. Nothing anyone said or could say was going to make it easier for me to move on. The circumstances that lead up to a breakup hurt and time was the only thing that would lessen that pain, not closure.
Closure represented a sort of door. Open door=pain. Closed door=healing.  No closed door ever truly changed the way I felt. It could not be that easy.
I was in a relationship that …read more

I read a piece from AOL Personals today about 5 of the biggest break-ups cues. I think if you are hearing some of these phrases from your partner, it’s possible that your relationship is heading toward a break-up, but it’s not inevitable.
For example, a request for space might mean just that – give your partner some space. No one wants to feel pressured or crowded. Back off, let your loved one miss you a little (this is advice that I give to my daughter’s boyfriend all the time.) 
Backing off can work two-fold. First, your partner gets the breathing room they …read more

Back in 2001, Dr. Richard Batista gave his wife, Dawnell, one of his kidneys. Mrs. Batista, had a history of kidney problems and the kidney donated by her husband, marked her third kidney transplant.
Now it’s 2009, his wife is suing him for divorce, and Batista wants his kidney back…..or the sum of $1.5 million. Mrs. Batista filed for divorce, back in 2005, 4 years after the kidney donation and transplant. Dr. Batista alleges that his wife had an affair – that’s the reasoning for his demand. He claims that the affair was conducted with Dawnell’s phyiscal therapist.  Mrs. Batista denies …read more

I’m a huge fan of Bonnie Hunt and her new show. Bonnie and her mom, Alice come up with some of the greatest things to say. Often, it hits a nerve with me (in a good way). This morning she was talking about divorces and breakups and Bonnie said, “If someone misuses you, don’t take it personally, just know that it says a lot more about them, than it does about you.”
I think this is important, for lots of reasons.