I was part of a group discussion on a parenting forum, not too long ago. We were all sharing tips and just generally gabbing for the sake of enlightenment. The subject of vehicles came up. I was asked what type of vehicle I drive. I knew that the question was a loaded one, but answered it anyway. Bracing myself for the verbal abuse I would surely receive from all of the eco friendly mamas, I answered, “A 15 passenger van.” Immediately, the rude backlash began. “Why?” “Do you really need that big of a van?” “Don’t you care about the environment?” The conversation sure does get ugly when politics, religion and Oprah are involved. Thank God I was smart enough to keep my opinions on Oprah in a quiet, inaccessible part of my mind. Otherwise, I might have been completely shredded by the pirana like chompers of the hybrid driving, Oprah loving women in the chat room.

After a long sigh, I decided to just try and laugh it off, then change the subject. I know from experience how fruitless these types of conversation can be. They are a no win situation. I wasn’t in the mood to call a draw, so I opted for the “Let’s change the subject” maneuver. One particularly opinionated hippie mom wasn’t biting. “I suppose you also buy your kids name brand clothes from Old Navy and The Gap!” She snottily chimed in. After I told her that the correct name of the store was just “Gap,” no “The” included, I asked her to elaborate. Now this lady had piqued my interest. She said that with as many little eco sucking leeches as I had, I should be trying to give back to the earth as much as possible. I should be dressing my kids in clothing made of recycled hemp. I should make them myself. I should only buy organic food, grown on farms who donate proceeds to worthy causes. I should have solar energy panels installed. I should only use recycled water outside. I should….yadda, yadda, yadda.

I heard every word that she preached, but after her reference to my spawn as “leeches,” I stopped caring. Maybe my kids do use the earth’s resources. Yes, they live off the fruits of the land. Yes, we drive a van that costs 98 dollars to fill up with fossil fuel. Yes, I shop at Old Navy and Gap. I do what I can for the environment and do not feel guilty that I am not an overzealous, tree hugging, picket organizer (no offense to all of you who are.) I barely have the time and energy to do the little things, like cooking, laundry, cleaning and nurturing my children, as it is. I’m lucky to be able to squeeze in a little tree hugging now and then, but when I do, it is done in love. This lady and her nasty name calling was just trying to piss me off and she succeeded beautifully.

“You know what?”  I asked, mounting my own pulpit. “Maybe we aren’t the most conservation minded folks, but we do what we can. The last thing I need to hear is criticism about how I’m not doing enough. Oh, and let me put this as nicely as possible…Your bitchy way of recruiting more soldiers for your cause is not a very good one. You suck at using people skills. Maybe you should spend less time with your arms wrapped around trees and a little more in charm school, you cow!” Her response was quick, “That was putting it nicely?” I laughed. “Yeah, I’m about as good at being nice as I am about saving the earth.” She was highly offended and I could care less. Let this be a lesson to all of us. When attempting to make your noble cause look worthy, refrain from likening people and their children to blood sucking invertebrates. It will never end well!

Post from: Blisstree

Love For The Earth = Hatred For Humans?