Brown pleaded not guilty on February 8th, and has recently released a video stating that “I ain’t a monster.” Take a look:

Experts say this case will not go to trial, but will reach a plea agreement instead. We shall see.

Image: Zuma Press

Post from: Blisstree

Rihanna May Break Silence About Chris Brown

I’ve been following the Rihanna/Chris Brown “alleged” physical violence situation. What she’s doing, going back to an “alleged” abuser, it’s sadly stereotypical. I’ve read quotes from people who know both Rihanna and Chris Brown, read that Diddy offered up his home for the two to reconcile, read that her father feels he can’t get through to her, but he’s supporting her.

I’ve also read that one of her sponsors is thinking about dropping her because they are uncomfortable with the way she is handling the situation.  I know that I, for one, bought a certain mascara just because it enhanced her eyes (mine are similarly colored). It’s possible that she’s broken, but she is still a lovely girl.  Getting abused doesn’t mean she should be kept from making a living.

It’s easy to sit in judgment of a situation when you are on the outside. I’d never stay with an abusive partner, you might say.  Personally, after my experience, I wish she’d be done with him, too, but I realize that it’s not that easy.  It wasn’t easy for my mom. When my brother’s dad said that he would not do it again, she believed him. He lied.

My girls have both heard about what is going on. They were big Chris Brown fans before, only one was a Rihanna fan. Kids talk and they don’t always get the correct information. I’ve tried to talk to the girls about abuse , about how it can happen in romantic relationships with teens, as well as adults. Bailey, my older daughter, related a story about her friend who is in an abusive relationship.

I’ve spent a lot of my children’s life alone, in large part because my experience was that men hit and I did not want my family hurt. I know that not all men hit, but growing up the way that I did, it’s messed with my head a bit. I recognize this and try to fight that screwy point of view.

I want my girls to be aware, but not paranoid. I want to show a balanced point of view, but sometimes it’s a struggle. I want my girls to recognize the warning signs. I don’t ever want my beautiful girls to look like Rihanna did in that horrible photo with the heartbroken look and the bruises.

If you are a parent, have you found yourself talking to your kids about the Rihanna/Chris Brown situation?

Image credit: All Posters.com

Post from: Blisstree

Talking To Kids About Physical Violence

Mind boggling! To say the least.

And this is just days after “charges were filed against him for allegedly assaulting her.” I am dying to know what the theme of this duet consists of, aren’t you?

This is either a classic case of battered woman’s syndrome, or (as some on the Web have speculated) it’s all for publicity. I vote for the former of those choices and not that latter. What do you think?

Post from: Blisstree

Rihanna and Chris Brown Will Sing a Duet

Rihanna has become the public face for domestic abuse, as her story is all-too common. According to one source, domestic violence, “is the most common cause of injury to women ages 15-44.”

Suffering abuse is bad enough. But it also changes the way women behave in relationships from that point forward. If women stay in a bad relationship, they are “likely to stop trusting their own perceptions and become passive” in everything from friendships to relationships.

The effects of abuse don’t end when the physical violence stops. Women need to remove themselves from these types of situations, and most of all they need to know that they didn’t do a thing to deserve them. Nothing. Women typically second-guess themselves and try to accommodate, so it’s their nature to want to please and get along. But they need to work against this instinct, and value their worth.

Rihanna, this beautiful and talented young women, needs to know her worth. If you could give Rihanna a message right now, what would it be?

Post from: Blisstree

What Would You Tell Rihanna?

While most of the comments are from people who are shocked and appalled at Chris Brown’s behavior, there some comments blaming Rihanna. Comments like “I don’t think Chris would just a hit a girl like that. She had to do something or say something out the way for him to really hurt her. And “… Chris’ career may be ruined forever … sooo sad. I love all his songs. Well I’m still gonna support him. I just don’t believe it … until he says it ….. cause Rihanna is a ***** .. well she looks like one anyways.”

It’s disgusting that people would blame the victim. It’s sad that after everything we’ve learned about domestic abuse there are still some people who defend the abuser.

Arguments are never resolved with fists. And it is NEVER ok for a man to hit a woman. There is not a single thing she could have said that would make it ok for him to leave her bruised and battered. If she was attacking him he needed to pull over and walk (or run) away. Call for help. It may not seem “manly” for a guy to run away, but a real man doesn’t hit a woman.

Unfortunately there are still a few people out there who don’t understand this.

Post from: Blisstree

Stop Blaming the Victim

Unfortunately dating violence isn’t as rare as we might think (or at least hope). But there isn’t a lot of education on the matter. Our teens have sex education class that teaches them about their bodies and pounds the abstinence message in to their head, but there is very little talk about healthy relationships and teen dating violence.

According to Love Is Not Abuse, 62% of dating tweens have a friend who has been verbally abused by a boyfriend/girlfriend. And only about half of tweens actually know the warning signs. Scary!

We need to talk to our teens about healthy relationships. Teens should be treating their partner with respect. No name calling or jealous rage. Teens need to understand Teen Dating Bill of Rights and Pledge. And they need to know the warning signs of an abusive relationship so they can get out early and know when to seek help.

A teen should ask, “Am I dating somebody who…”

• calls me names?
• tells me how what I can and cannot wear?
• tells me who I can and cannot talk to?
• won’t let me hang out with my friends?
• is jealous or possessive?
• won’t let me make any decisions?
• threatens me?
• is violent? Gets in to fights all the time? And brags about it?
• tries to pressure me to have sex?
• abuses alcohol and drugs?
• tries to control me?
• hits me?
• puts me down?
• makes me feel bad about myself?

Relationships are supposed to be loving and supportive. If you’re miserable then it’s time to get out. If it’s abuse then it’s time to seek help. Nobody deserves to suffer at the hands of somebody who is supposed to love them.

Post from: Blisstree

Educating Teens About Dating Violence