An this is seriously all I have to say on the matter….

For this week.  I think.  Maybe….

As you can see there are a lot of ingredients that go into an orgasm. So many people are squeamish about their sexuality that it is a wonder that anyone has them at all.  Personally I would like to see a drive through… “Yes, I will take a four minute orgasm with a side of …”

Never mind.   Just seriously, stop being so serious!  O.k.? 

The only thing I haven’t really broached here in this series is sex toys and other helps.  I really think that every woman should, if at all possible, learn to create an orgasm on her own but I also realize that sometimes that doesn’t happen.  Sooooo….toys.

Toys are coming out of the…uh….toybox.  They aren’t just for perverts anymore.  There is a great assortment of them, and they are everywhere.  Amazon sells probably a couple hundred different kinds of vibrators!  When Marc and i took the blog I put a couple of my favorite shops in the links on the side bar.  They are not porn shops, and if I remember correctly they are Christian.  Amazon also has alot of stuff…so, I thought I would give you a quick run down on “stuff” and what it does.  That way you don’t have to ask your teenager.

Just kidding.

• Vibrator: can be used in a variety of ways from stimulation of the clitoris to stimulation of the perineal area of the husband.  When using a position that does not directly stimulate the clitoris you can use the vibrator for extra oomph.   Some vibrators are meant to be used internally against the G-spot, and then there are some that have internal and external capabilites for doing both at the same time.
• Lube: Lube comes in many forms.  There is flavored lube, unflavored lube, waterproof lube, and lube to use with latex.  There are lubes that heat up, lubes that tingle and lubes that deaden sensation to extend the husband’s ..uhh..”up” time.  (It basically holds off ejaculation longer due to desensitization).  If you are prone ot yeast infections don;t use the flavored lubes for penetration.  My personal favorite lube is organic coconut oil..it is antifungal, antibacterial, and nice and slippery.  You can melt it down a little, add some sugar free coffee syrup in your favorite flavor and make your own flavored lube.  So…Why lube?  Lube makes things slippery so that there is less chance of pain during penetration.  The slipperiness can enhance the sexual experience, and if you use one of the specialty lubes (tingling, heat) then it can add a different feel altogether.  Some people like it, some don’t.
• Flavored Powders and Frostings ust on and lick off.  Pretty darn simple.
• Vibrating Ring: This does several things.  It is all about multitasking.  It is a silicone ring with a small vibrator attached.  The ring fits over the penis and settles at the base.  It helps to hold in the blood(without cutting off circulation..it is not tight for most men) to help with ED problems.  It also vibrates giving a different sensation…it ALSO vibrates against the clitoris during thrusting so there is more action everywhere.
• Intensifying Gel: Goes by many names but basically it makes your clitoris more sensitive.  Increased sensation means increased pleasure, generally.  Be careful though, too much and it can just make you sore.
• Blindfold: Why a blindfold, you ask?  Blindfolds are sexy because you are out of control.  Remember, part of the whole intensity of sex is the being out of control.  Remember the scene in the video I posted?  Blindfolds, feathers, ice, different textures, and even light handcuffs or silk ties are all related to light BDSM.  It can be very exciting to be at the mercy of your spouse. (This is where the trust comes in).  Most people initially react with a “No way!”.  How do you know if you don’t try it?
• Penis enhancers: Honestly, I am not sure I could look at one of theseand not laugh..but they used to be called French Ticklers back in the olden days.  They are made of silicone and fit on the penis..they have various bumps, and other odd shapes on them to enhance the way it feels…if you can stop laughing.
• Ben Wa Balls/Luna Beads: Everyone knows that Kegels are good for you.  Well these are made to be used internally during kegels to increase the resistance.  They are also stimulating.
• Nipple Rings:These aren’t  piercings.  The nipple fits through a space in intricately patterned wire.  They creates enough tightness to let you know it is there. They are pretty.
• Stroker: This is a silicone sleeve for men.  Sometimes they have goop within the layers of silicone, and some have small beads…some vibrate. They are basically a fake vagina.  They are an excellent idea for couples that can’t have intercourse for a long time for some reason..just makes things a little different.  I suggested one of these to someone outside the family once, during a particulary difficult time…they really liked it.  I can’t tell you more than that..it isn’t something i will be able to use.
• Tightener:A cream that causes the tissues of the vagina to swell and tighten..I am not sure this stuff is sucha  great idea…
• Prostate Massager: The truth is that many  men really get pleasure form prostate massage but the only way to get to it is  anally.  The aneros is probably the best massager on the market.  It it inserted into the anus and has bumps that move against the prostate as you move.  The compay also does a similar one for g spots for women.
• Costumes: Again, it is fun to role play.  For some women, it allows them to leave themselves for awhile and become someone else. Since most men are visual it gives them a little different wrapping on the package.  Love Fifi is linked on the sidebar at the bottom.  It is by far the best place I know of to get costumes..
• Talk:Do not underestimate the power of well spoken words to light a fire.  Make some noise, let yourself go, say words that you wouldn’t say anywhere else..It’s o.k. Stop thinking and allow yourself to feel.
• Do whatever it takes to feel sexy.
• Games: There are thousands of games out there specifically to enhance your sex life.  There are many more that can be used in the same way…Twister could be a pretty amazing game if you play it naked, or partially clothed.  Strip checkers, anyone?  Loosen up and make your love life the mini-vacation it was meant to be.

I realize that there is a ton more I could have covered here.  Bu this is a good start, and I have a tendency to overwhem people anyway.
So for the rest of the week I will talk about something besides sex.

Glad it’s Thursday.

Image:Morgueflile

Post from: Blisstree

Stalking the Elusive “O” Part Five

It seems that Christian pastors are coming out.  No, they are not gay.  But they are speaking out on a subject much tabooed in the church.  S-e-x.

What else did you expect?

A Dallas Ft. Worth pastor Sunday challenged his married couples to a seven day“Sex-periment”.   It isn’t only Doug Brown author of “Just Do It”,  or the pastor who recently challenged his congregation to 40 days of sex.  More and more we are hearing pastors that are teaching married couples in their congregations that sex in marriage is important in building strong healthy marriages.

Here is the link to the latest story: Sexperiment

For some reason sex became a taboo subject in America’s churches, including the discussion of sex in a monogamous one man-one woman marriage.   I grew up joking as an adolescent about sex but can’t have a serious conversation on the subject as an adult.  We recently were talking about how I can joke or kid about sex, even with another couple or others, but I avoid having conversations with Marye about our sex life.

It has been the same in churches and Sunday Schools.   If you asked questions or needed counsel for your floundering marriage from your pastor or church leader they hemmed and hawed around the subject.  Then they quickly steered the conversation to a more comfortable subject.

My former pastor met me at my request to meet with him about our marriage at a local Starbucks one Saturday morning.  As the small talk was subsiding I brought us to the reason for our get together.  I told him that we as a couple were having a major struggle in our marriage because of sex.   “Well Marc, er, uh….you know…”

I went to work that morning frustrated that the big brawny retired soldier and pastor turned as squeamish on the subject as I was.  Well,  that was no help!  I called and scheduled another get together and we talked about the War Against Terror and other military common ground; my son who is in the Air force, etc.   It was going very well until I asked if he had gotten any insight or wisdom from the Lord for him to share counsel with me.

“Marc, I need to pick up my wife for her hair appointment” was the response.

I am ecstatic that there are men, godly men, who will spread this message from their pulpits.  After all God used an entire book in his training manual for life, a.k.a. The Holy Bible.  It is called Song of Solomon or Song of Songs depending on your translation of God’s Word you use.  Personally from my linguistic background, Song of Songs may be the better translation.  The book is about married love, and the translation of Song of Songs is a superlative or Best.  The Song of Songs means that there is none better or will there ever be.  Just like God’s Son, Jesus, God’s Word fleshed out is The King of kings.  There is no king above Him.

It is written in the midst of the greatest love story ever told.   It is written for married men & women of yesteryear, today and the future married men and women to come.

Bravo to God’s men to preach this message to God’s married couples!

image:morguefile

Post from: Blisstree

Christian Pastors Coming Out ?