They found that the more a woman used the word, “I”, the happier and more secure she felt in her relationship. The reason?  Researchers believe that the more comfortable a woman feels within her relationship, the more she is able to talk about herself.

The “I”-laden instant messages could indicate women were talking about themselves and were comfortable doing so with their partners, Slatcher said.

“Women tend to be more emotionally expressive in general and tend to be more disclosing in general,” Slatcher told LiveScience. “So this finding suggests that beyond women wanting to disclose more and disclosing more in their everyday life, that when they do disclose more in their relationships, they’re happier in those relationships.”

He added, “An alternative explanation might be that you are not so enmeshed in your relationship that you have lost yourself completely,” Slatcher said.

Why study the instant messages?

“Instant messages are a great way to get at how people communicate in the real world,” said lead study researcher Richard Slatcher of UCLA.

Further findings included:

For women, the more they used so-called positive negations, such as “not happy,” the less satisfied they and their partners were in the relationship.

The more men used positive sarcasm, such as “oh great,” the less satisfied they were in their relationships and the more likely that relationship would split.

For both men and women, the use of negative emotions, such as “angry,” wasn’t related to their relationship satisfaction or stability.

Post from: Blisstree

Instant Messages Give Clues To Relationship Health

I had the chance to visit Austin for the first time this past March for SXSW Interactive. Since I’ve been back, I’ve been saying that it is the coolest city I’ve ever been to. If it was easy to get a work visa for the US, I’d have been there by now.

I can definately see why it would win out as a great dating city. One of the reasons the article said that Austin was great for dating is that more alcohol is purchased outside the home than any other city. It makes sense…less depressed people sitting at home drinking themselves silly; more people out and about letting their guard down and tipping back the liquid-courage.

Way to go Austin!

Post from: Blisstree

Austin Is The Best City For Single Folk

Today I found something about using biodata to find a potential mate.  Biodata is essentially a resume that focuses a good deal on who you came from, as well as were you are now.  Who are your people?  Do your people fit with my people?  Do our bloodlines go together?  Information is gathered and then posted on a matrimonial website.  

Part resume, part personal ad, and part family tree, biodata can cut through the time-consuming process of finding a spouse by turning it into something akin to a job interview: What are his qualifications? Is she a good match? What is his income potential?

Used primarily by South Asians in arranged marriages, biodata emphasizes compatibility, education, and family history, including caste, more than romance. There are also physical factors to be considered, such as complexion and, occasionally, blood type.

Even among assimilating South Asian Americans like Thaker, the exchange of biodata is popular. In fact, some believe that the deeply rooted tradition is on the rise in part because of the rapid pace of modern life and the increasing popularity of matrimonial websites.

 

What do you think of the idea of using biodata to find a spouse?  Have you heard of this before?  Do you think it has any merit for people in the West?

Post from: Blisstree

Using Biodata To Find a Spouse

Speed Dating isn’t everyone’s cup of tea, but for those that just
don’t seem to have all the time in the world to try to get to know every
person before they go on a date, this may be for you.

Annual Marathon Speed Dating Event
Date: January 24, 2009

Time: 6-8:30 p.m.

Where: Atlantic City Country Club on Shore Road in Northfield

Cost: $25 fee  for yearly card members $30 for non-members.

You must RSVP by Jan 17, 2009 by calling 609-601-7884

Post from: Blisstree

Huge Speed Dating Event

I read an article tonight that talked about Dr. Marco van Gelderen, a senior lecturer in the Department of Management and International Business, at Albany, who has done extensive research into the subject of dating as a service industry.

Dr. van Gelderen says the dating service industry has grown in recent years as a result of greater demand and rapidly evolving technology including the internet. But too many potential clients remain stuck in “singledom” because of a lack of industry awareness of their needs as well as ambivalence about using dating services.

“The dating industry has a number of special problems in being successful in connecting people,” says Dr van Gelderen. “First, people don’t like to admit that they are lonely. Loneliness is something that happens to other people.

“There is a social stigma to loneliness and even to being alone. There is also the perception that dating services are for losers.”

He interviewed many singles asking them questions about what factors affect attraction and dating. He wanted input that would help to create new ideas in the dating service industry. Some of the ideas that the Dr came up with include a combination dating and weight loss facility, blind-folded speed dating, and chatting about mundane, but commonly used products as a way to start conversation.

Okay, some of these ideas are interesting, but they sound a bit crazy to me. Weight loss and dating? I know that people of all sizes are looking for love, but weight loss takes time and lots of effort and meeting someone new works best in a relaxed environment. Those two things- weight loss and romance- might not be mutually beneficial. Don’t you want to date someone when you are feeling confident and secure with who you are, where you are, what you are?

Blind-folded speed dating sounds like a reality show game. Did you ever see the episode of Survivor All Stars where they were doing a blind-folded game with big puzzle pieces or something like that? What a (comical) mess. People falling, people hitting their heads, people shouting. It was nuts. Does that sound like what you are looking for in a first meeting? Does that scene carry even a hint of romance?

I think that it’s good that there is an open dialogue within the industry, but I’m not sure they are heading in the right direction. How about meeting people through volunteering for a worthy cause? Or…. cooking classes for singles? (Wait, I might have mentioned that one before). Just because it’s a new idea, that does not mean that it’s a good idea.

What do you think? Do you have a better idea than a combined weight loss/dating service?

Image credit: All Posters.com

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Blindfolded Speed Dating – Good or Bad Idea?

BarOptic.com streams live video feeds from nightclubs and bars. The feeds are accessible via the internet and cell phones. Potential patrons can access the feed in order to help them make a decision on the club or bar to visit.

For example, on Tuesday, Thursday, Friday, and Saturday nights from 10pm to late night you can see what’s going on at Vinyl in Denver or many other clubs. To complement the BarOptic live feeds, BarOptic also has BarOptic TV on its web site to enhance the user’s experience by providing the ability to navigate through nightlife related, professionally produced shows. According to Salvador, users spend an average of almost six minutes per visit.

In a time when convenience is everything and free time is so rare – people want to make the most of their going out.  This provides a prime opportunity to make sure you’re hitting the right club on the right night.

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BarOptic – Virtual Bar Hopping

Virtual reality is not all about games anymore, in fact, it’s grown up quite a bit.

Virtual reality is being used by companies to train employees, by students taking college courses, to provide physical therapy and now to help singles find meaningful relationships.

OmniDate provides the latest in virtual reality to help singles find real-life meaningful relationships.

You may be surprised to learn that virtual reality is much like an old-fashioned way of dating, where people take the time to really get to know each other, instead of sending electronic winks or pokes. According to a study by a Harvard University professor, those people who go on virtual dates first tend to have more successful face-to-face dates.

And with the gas prices being what they are, virtual dating might just be a logical answer to increasing your social life while saving money on fuel prices.

What a fun concept!

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Gas Prices Too High? Try Virtual Dating

Copenda, the revolutionary social people search engine that allows people to search for their soul mate or new friends in social networks and dating web sites. Their complex algorithms crawl semi-structured data from multiple social networks and online dating sites such as Myspace, Bebo, Facebook, hi5, friendster, match, plentyoffish and more.

More and more people are using the web to meet new people and communicate with their friends. The main places people use to meet new friends or look for dating are social networks and online dating sites.

One of the major problems in meeting new people in social networks is that users need to scan and dive deeply into the profiles to initiate a connection for relationships or dating. Although many users use social networks for dating purposes, the social network user experience is not suited for this purpose. Online dating sites, on the other hand, are designed for this purpose but suffer from low status among the younger generation.

Copenda uniquely integrates an innovative user interface with dating site features such as personality search and social network features such as ranking, comments and tagging.

Check it out!  What have you go to lose?  If Copenda can make like a little easier by pulling all your online accounts into one convenient location for dating, this could be quite a time saver for you.

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Online Hookups Made Easy

Their 5 for 7 now and will likely think this is a complete generational gap, but the list of 7 makes a lot of sense.

How many of these rules of thumb have you broken?

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Biggest Misuses of Texting to Avoid in Dating

Dating Daze asks – Are Men Getting Lazy?

Why Online Dating is Better Than Real Life Dating

Now the 75 million Nascar lovers in the US can meet online and become lovers.  Race on over to Meet Me at the Races

Rural Love offers Equestrian, Farmers and Rural Dwellers a means of dating online and social networking.

Lovers Manual: How to Make That First Date Great!

How to Love Better – 50 Surprising Tips

Top 10 Reasons Why Geeks Make the Best Catch

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Dating & Relationships Around the Web