In this day and age and with all the people I’ve encountered, this sort of thing is not new to me anymore. But to hear it happen to a close friend, it sent ripples of fear, disgust and anger combined down my spine. I, sometimes, surprise myself that I still find it shocking to hear that there are people who are capable of doing those kinds of things.

Physical abuse is a big no-no in my book (huge understatement). It’s sad to see that even people I know are not safe from it. Were they blinded by love? Ran on ignorance or foolishness? Did they begin to think that they are deserving of such treatment? Perhaps the answer to these questions is a YES or a NO or a MAYBE. Only these women know. Some are fortunate to be able to break free from the monster’s hold but some are not.

How can we reach out to these women? Will they listen to us? I’d like to hope that once we do speak up and provide them support, they’ll sit up and listen AND find the strength to leave that kind of life behind. What am I saying? That’s not life at all.

My friend found the strength to break free from an abusive partner. I reckon so can you.

Post from: Blisstree

Breaking Free From A Monster

A good friend of mine tips us on certain *romantic* places you can take you date to — with emphasis on putting an element of surprise in the plan. Of course, this only applies to singles who are currently staying or living in Manila, Philippines.

Markku Seguerra is a programmer-slash-photographer who is currently single and, quite possibly, in love. That’s probably why he’s able to write a post on five special and romantic places you can take your date to. He’s most likely wishing that he could take his lady friend (someone he’s crushing on) on the said date venues — surprise dates nonetheless.

Without further ado, let me list his suggested places:

1. Moomba (Mother Ignacia St. corner Roces Ave.)
2. Dencio’s (Ayala Heights, Balara)
3. Chocolate Kiss (Bahay ng Alumni, University of the Philippines, Diliman)
4. Starbuck’s (Tagaytay)
5. Boracay (Boracay Island, Philippines)

I recommend that you hop on over Markku’s blog at rebelpixel.com and check out his personal thoughts on these places.

Ladies, don’t you find it adorable that there are actually single guys out there as romantic as this guy is? I do.

Post from: Blisstree

Surprise Date Spot Ideas for Manila-based Singles

These tips focused on your dating behaviour, your expectations and initial impressions, and your methods of procuring a date.

• Don’t lie about your civil status or your police record.
  Dating is for single people! If you’re already married, stop signing up for those dating sites! It’s unethical of you — not to mention, unsafe for unsuspecting users! — to not disclose important things like you’re a convicted felon out on parole.
• Don’t be a “Professional Online Dater”.
  I guess this applies to those people who treats online dating like a sport — in constant search for that greener pasture, metaphorically speaking. LOL.
• Stop dreaming of an overseas romance.
  I reckon the idea of hooking up with a foreigner is exotic. But if, from the start, it’s not financially possible for you guys to meet in person since it involves a considerable amount of travel expenditures, you have to wake up and face that reality.
• Don’t settle for less than a millionaire.
  I guess this applies to online daters who already are millionaires or, uh, gold-diggers ambitious people? Heehee.
• Don’t be a cheap date.
  If you go with the free dating sites, you can’t expect fantastic match results. Or perhaps, it can be a good thing since you already have that in common — cheap preferences, so to speak. Heehee.

I suggest you read the article cuz it presented some reliable arguments regarding these tips.

You have additional tips to share? Feel free to let us know!

Post from: Blisstree

What NOT to Do When Dating Online

Tip 10: Prep Up

All men want to end up with their ideal woman. It’s probably the reason why you’re reading these tips I’ve been dishing out. You want to find a way to be able to do just that. I don’t blame you, I mean, who doesn’t want to end up with their ideal?

I’m sure most of you believe that the first thing you should do in order to win her over is to learn how that woman thinks or perhaps to find out what makes her tick. Am I right? What if I tell you that it’s the last thing you should be doing?

Anyway, if you look back to all the tips, you’ll understand their importance. You see, the first thing you really should be doing is to understand how it is to be a man — in the truest essence of the word. You’ve got to learn it. You’ve got to live it.

Yes. You simply have to apply what you’ve learned to yourself. And once you’re confident enough about who you are and what it is that you want, you’ll soon realise that it’s not that hard to learn female psychology. It’ll come easy for you to grasp ideas on how they think and what they want.

It’s all part of the preparation. You really need to do some mental work if you really want to be as attractive as I think you can be. It’s just not about memorising pick-up lines, fancy cars or good looks. Look around. Do you honestly think that the world’s population shot up to 6.5 billion [half of which is in Asia, by the way] because it’s filled with men who have all that?

Point is, I believe that all men have a chance. It requires a bit of work for some but still — it’s a reason to celebrate. So do the work that needs to be done and you’ll reap positive things in your dating life.

Well — call me optimistic.

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Post from: Blisstree

Tip 10: Prep Up

Tip 9: Practice Carte Blanche

Carte Blanche n unrestricted power to act at one’s own discretion

I’m well aware of the importance that men put on their own space, i.e. poker night, sports, drinks at the pub with the boys, couch time. You guys need us women to respect that.

Personally, I don’t mind it. I’d offer to come check it out one time but I certainly won’t make a habit out of it cuz I do have my own set of interests.

Having said that, I want you to respect the woman’s independece, too. Because, admit it or not, hearing your girlfriend or a girl you’re currently seeing make plans that doesn’t include you creates a certain reaction that may just be called jealousy. It’s really quite normal and it’s something you can actually deal with or learn to get over.

This is when having learned to live your life alone pays off. You already have that inner confidence and self-sufficiency that you don’t depend on her presence to make your relationship with her secure.

Besides, do you really like a clingy girl around? That’s the sort of person you’ll be creating if you don’t have the “live and let live” attitude.

If you already know that you have these traits, you will notice that women will find themselves drawn to you. Reason being that there are quite a few men who are like you and we don’t particularly find clingy men attractive, too.

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Post from: Blisstree

Tip 9: Practice Carte Blanche

Tip 8: Live The Single Life

Yes. I’m referring to you living a life of a bachelor. I’m suggesting that you work on your life first. Alone. Enrich it with experiences and passions, to the point when you’ll come to wonder if you, indeed, need a woman in your life, thus, creating a ironic dilemma in your dating life since you have grown accustomed to living alone.

That’s the beauty of it, you see. It has now become a choice and not social pressure. You will cease to view your entering a relationship as an obligation or an act of desperation but a decision to edify your life and hers. This will help you weigh what’s important to you.

This kind of mindset will be visible to women since it will become apparent on how you conduct yourself in meeting people, in dating and in the actual relationship. Women will find you a whole lot attractive since they are aware that if you decide to pursue them it will be for the right reasons and you won’t be dragging them down by being clingy or worse, someone who can’t commit. Women, after all, want someone who can edify their lives, too.

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Post from: Blisstree

Tip 8: Live The Single Life

Tip 7: Be A Man

Boys need to grow up sooner or later. And I don’t just mean physically. I’m putting emphasis on the mental, psychological and emotional growth. You simply have to learn how to be a MAN.

This means that your level of maturity is at par with your age and experiences. Learn to step up to what’s expected of you as a mature adult.

How do you achieve a higher level of maturity? Here are some things that come to mind:

• You’ve got to stop acting all that when you know you only amount to a certain much. False arrogance will amount to nothing.
• Quit name-dropping to raise your social status. No. Social climbing ain’t limited to women.
• And one more thing that I, personally, detest — whingers. ACT on it, pal.
• Grow a backbone. Do you really need people to back you up? Seriously?
• Be decisive. How hard is it to make a decision?

It’s not such a tall order, right? Every woman can admit to liking boys but in the end it’s the men we want to end up with.

Previous Tip – Tip 6: Lose The Cover-Ups

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Post from: Blisstree

Tip 7: Be A Man

Tip 6: Lose The Cover-Ups

It’s quite a common practice for both genders that when faced with an individual they’re attracted to, they always put their best foot forward. We all know that, by experience, it won’t be long when true colours show.

My suggestion is to refrain from hiding the things you’re insecure about. It’s best that you just laugh about them if or when the subject is raised in a conversation. After all, when the question about weaknesses is asked during a job interview, you don’t exactly go and put yourself down with the interviewer now, do you? Just think of it as an ice-breaker.

Let me give you an example, if you’re insecure about your baldness, you can say something like, “You can tell how old a guy is by counting the strands of his hair, oh, wait — that’s a bit unfair for the guys who still have loads of them, don’t you think?” However, a word of caution — don’t over do the jokes. You’re meant to be witty and funny, not cheesy.

In the end, women will think that you’re comfortable with what you look like and that usually is compensated with a smile or her number.

Previous Tip – Tip 5: Believe In Yourself

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Post from: Blisstree

Tip 6: Lose The Cover-Ups

Tip 5: Believe In Yourself

Since I raised the subject of beautiful women — what is it about them that shatters your confidence level? I mean, I’m sure you think that your own mothers are such beautiful creatures but I know they don’t compare to Victoria’s Secret or Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Models. Still. I doesn’t answer the question why you can’t seem to find a way to be at ease when faced with such heavenly human beings. Come on, admit it.

Lesson for today? Well, it’s quite obvious. I want you to believe in yourself.

One way to achieve just that is to go through this exercise each day:

Find and write down 5 things about yourself that you think will make a woman feel fortunate to be with you or be in your presence, at least.

Then each morning, read it out loud. It’s to remind yourself. It will help nourish your faith in yourself. Do it until, well — until you don’t need to anymore. And when that happens, you’ll soon realise how charming you can be.

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Post from: Blisstree

Tip 5: Believe In Yourself

Tip 4: Be Unfazed

Are you easily awe-struck by celebrities? Or act goofy around beautiful women? Perhaps you tend to follow your boss around like a puppy in order for you to “make a good impression”?

STOP.

Don’t you know that that’s a real turn-off? Eeek. I’d be very worried if I were you. Hahaha.

You simply have to learn how to keep your cool!

Here’s a quick how-to:

• 1. Always remember that these people are human, too. Just like you.
• 2. Resist that subservient inclination.
• 3. Never think that you are not worthy of their attention.
• 4. There’s something about you that makes you special and they don’t know about it.

Sure, she’s gorgeous and you’re scared shitless that she just might ridicule you when you approach her but hey, like I said, she doesn’t know who you are. If she sees that you are comfortable and you don’t act any different around beautiful, rich, famous and powerful people, she’ll definitely think twice before turning down an opportunity to meet you.

As Rob Schneider often says in Adam Sandler films, “You can do it!” [Heh. I know. I suck at impersonations. Good thing this is just text. Ha.]

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Post from: Blisstree

Tip 4: Be Unfazed