This made me start thinking about things that we could all do this week to raise awareness of EDs as well as to help put a dent in their stronghold.

Some of my ideas include:

1.  Pledging not to weigh ourselves this week.

2.  Pledging to compliment the women in our lives on something other than their figures this week.

3.  Pledging to not binge, binge and purge or starve ourselves this week.

4.  Pledging to throw (or give) away the “skinny” clothes we use to torment ourselves.

5.  Pledging to make others understand that eating disorders are a disease, not a choice.

What are your thoughts?

Post from: Blisstree

Celebrate National Eating Disorders Awareness Week

I have been fortunate enough that no ever gave me the ultimatum “It’s the eating disorder or me… your choice.”  However, I know this happens within many friendships, relationships, marriages and even families.

When does the person who cannot understand the desire behind withholding nourishment, ingesting massive quantities of food (only to purge it or starve it out later) or taking laxatives night and day simply shut down?  When does he or she say farewell?

Have you ever lost a friend, family member or significant other to your eating disorder?  Was it worth it?

Post from: Blisstree

Saying farewell to the disordered eater

Out of 225 respondents:

- 22 said they were tired of giving 100% to their EDs;
- 11 said they were trying to get better because of their friends/family;
- 19 said they were afraid of getting sick(er) or of dying;
- 29 said that most of the above answers applied;
- 87 said they didn’t want to get rid of their EDs;
- 25 said they didn’t have an ED (god bless them!); and
- 32 said they wanted to live and not just exist.

Now, I must say that at first these numbers shocked me. I kept thinking, “Why are so many people (87 out of 225!) clinging to their EDs?” However, I started to realize that MOST of the respondents do want to recover. In other words, the number 87 is a little deceiving. Although it does represent 39% of the persons who contributed, it would seem that more Breaking the Mirror visitors do want to get rid of their eating disordered behavior than do not.

I’m curious-did the answers surprise you in any way?

Post from: Blisstree

To get better or not to get better… that is the question…

Anyway, I just wanted to ask for some help with a little project I’m working on here at Breaking the Mirror.  See, I’d like to get some stories of people without eating disorders who have in some way been affected by the eating disorders of others.  Moms, dads, friends, sisters, brothers, co-workers, et cetera are all invited to contribute their experiences.

I think that sometimes we forget the impact of our eating disorders.  We get so wrapped up in ourselves that we neglect to consider how our eds can really change the lives of those around us. 

My plan is to publish (anonymously, if wished) some tales on this blog (provided anyone would like to share!)  If you’re interested in helping me with this project, ”EDs: From the Other Side”, please send your up to 400 word story to lemonpepr(at)aol(dot)com.  (Bylines can be given.)

I look forward to hearing from all the people who visit Breaking the Mirror who do not have eating disorders but who have been affected by them in some way.  Thank you!

Post from: Blisstree

Calling all stories… from persons without eating disorders

Obviously, we’re living in a world of free choice, which includes the choice to stick with an eating disorder rather than try to move past it. I understand that and would never force someone to seek out help. Still, it bothers me tremendously when I read statements along the lines of: “No one better try to pull an intervention on me!” or “I’m never giving up ana!”

I don’t think there’s an answer to this problem. Obviously, not everyone will (or can) get healthy. Maybe they never were. Maybe ana/mia give them so much comfort that letting go seems horrifying. Maybe they have defined themselves by their eating disorders for so long that they can’t imagine life without starving, bingeing/purging or bingeing.

When I read the pro-ana and pro-mia sites, I do get angry… but mostly I become worried. Though I’m sure the writers there would scoff at what I’m about to say, I still have to say it: I get it. I understand. I know how much tougher it is to get well than to stick with what you know. Heck, I don’t love to change any more than anyone else.

For me, though, I decided long ago to work on my own recovery (and it’s a long, arduous process that sucks at times) because I don’t enjoy:

a) Lying.
b) Hurting others.
c) Losing mental energy to an eating disorder.
d) Feeling sick/nauseated 24/7.
e) Risking my life.

The benefits of an ED just don’t outweigh the disadvantages.

Post from: Blisstree

Get rid of my eating disorder? I’d rather die!

The first question I received is:

• Do anorexics secretly (or not so secretly) really think less of bulimics? Or binge eaters?

I think it’s a fair inquiry and I encourage you to reply in the comments section. 

Honestly, when I was actively restricting, I didn’t even think of bulimia or binge eating.  It wasn’t “my thing” and I was too self-absorbed to worry about what someone else was doing.  But I’ve heard that there is indeed some “class warfare” among different ED sufferers.  (Want to read some scathing comments about yours truly?  Check out this post.  Wow!  What a can of worms that opened!)

Post from: Blisstree

Ask ED: The Real Scoop

Therefore, I suppose it shouldn’t be too surprising that plenty of women and men with eating disorders such as anorexia, bulimia and binge eating turn to self-mutilation.

Don’t believe me? Just head to any pro-ana or pro-mia discussion board. (Or don’t – I wouldn’t want them to trigger any latent EDs.) The subject of “cutting” appears far more frequently than you might imagine.

I’ve tried to uncover figures to see how many anorexics, bulimics and binge eaters tend to “cut” or perform another self-injurious action. Here’s what I’ve found thus far:

• At CaringOnline the authors report that “…A study by Favazza and Conterio (1989) states that episodic and repetitive self-mutilation are frequently seen in conjunction with, or as a replacement for, eating disorders. In a study of 290 self-mutilating women, they found that 22% of the subjects suffered from only bulimia nervosa, 15% from anorexia nervosa and 13% from both disorders, for a total of 50%.”

• At MentalHelp.net, Allan Schwartz, Ph.D. states “…It is not unusual for some people suffering from eating disorders to engage in direct bodily self-harm in an attempt to reduce the emotional pain and suffering. The self-harm can occur in the form of cutting and self-mutilation with a razor, knife or any sharp instrument.”
• TroubledTeen101 claims “…because teens who self-injure or self-mutilate often do not know how to ask for help, it is important to watch for some of these signs that a teen may be harming him or herself, or is at risk for doing so:… Unexplained injuries, such as cuts, scratches, burns, bruises, etc.;… A history of eating disorders…”

When I was at my worst, I never cut, but I would sometimes hit my thighs as hard as I could just to FEEL something besides the agony of loneliness and depression.

Does this whole connection between eating disorders and self-harm resonate with you?

Post from: Blisstree

On the “cutting” edge of eating disorders

We’ve already examined Steps 1 and 8. Now, we’ll be looking at Step 12:

• Step 12 – Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to other alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.

Again, we’ll replace the word “alcoholics” with the phrase “persons with eating disorders”.

Personally, I feel that I’m doing this Step almost daily by:

1. Writing this blog.

2. Talking with teens and adults about eating disorders.

3. Being observant and watching out for EDs in those I love.

How are you carrying the message? How will you carry it to those you meet in the future?

(Interested in learning more about the twelve steps in action? Check out Mark at A Dozen Steps.)

Post from: Blisstree

Twelve Steps to Recovery: Step 12

• Step 8 – Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all

I have to admit that I’ve never written out all the persons who were harmed by my eating disorder. If I did, I’m sure I’d be shocked.

I suppose I should start with myself, to be perfectly honest. Then, I’d move on to my immediate family. From there, I’d branch out to my friends.

Though I’m not sure how I would make amends, it probably seems like a good thing to do to start listing all the people I’ve hurt along the way. Having an eating disorder turns you into a liar, and whenever you lie to someone who cares about you all in the name of holding on to your addiction, you’re being disrespectful and unkind (at the very least.)

Our final AA Step will be Step 12:

• Step 12 – Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to other alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs

Post from: Blisstree

Twelve Steps to Recovery: Step #8

Today, some of my fellow b5 bloggers and I will be talking about how the twelve steps can be relevant to our particular readers.

As far as eating disorders go, it’s not difficult to substitute “alcohol” with “an eating disorder” in the steps. The first I’d like to tackle is Step 1:

• Step 1 – We admitted we were powerless over alcohol – that our lives had become unmanageable

If we say “powerless over our EDs”, the sentence still makes perfect sense. After all, an anorexic, bulimic or binge eater does tend to get to a “powerless” state. I know how it feels to be under ana’s grip; it’s a very lonely, unmanageable experience.

My question for you is this:

Have you admitted yet that you are a slave to your eating disorder? Have you accepted that fact? Or are you still in the mode of trying to justify what you’ve been doing to your body, your mind and your soul?

Next up, we’ll look at Step 8:

• Step 8 – Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all

(Want to see how other b5 bloggers are interpreting the Twelve Steps?  Go to Healthbolt for links to them all.)

Post from: Blisstree

Twelve Steps to Recovery: Step #1