I’ve kept this shirt for 4 years because I am waiting . . .
for my torso to shrink
or the shirt to lengthen 2 inches.
I’ve got this crazy entitlement issue with my shirts. I feel I should be allowed to move my arms without showing my stomach.
The one with the pink scarf too. My mother bought them for me and it feels ungrateful to admit they don’t fit. What’s the statute of limitations on this?
My torso not only has to shrink for the striped one to fit, but my boobs do too. I’m holding out because shrinking boobs …read more

I keep these earrings – without their match – because . . .
After several years and a move to a new house in a new city I’m hoping to find it’s pair.
Because it’s dear to me and extremely expensive? (It’s mostly cheap crap from Claire’s Boutique.)
There’s one lapis earring up there that I liked so much I actually wore it (at least twice) with a different earring hoping to bring back that asymmetrical fashion of the 80s. I lost its pair around 2001.
Perhaps I’ve internalized my grandparents’ depression-era “waste not, want not” philosophy a little to deeply?
I wonder if Joshua over …read more

I was bending over frantically sorting Zack’s toys and throwing them in boxes when Ainsley, my 6 year old daughter, shouted, Mom your butt crack is totally showing!
I see Mommy’s butt crack! I see Mommy’s butt crack! I see Mommy’s butt crack!
She sang as she ran around me laughing and pulling down her britches to show her own butt crack. Zack, her 20-month-old brother, yanked his own pants down to show of his own crack and danced behind her, echoing,
 Mama Ba ack! Mama Buh Cack! Mama Cack!
That’s it, I’m buying a decent pair of jeans! I laughed. Apparently, …read more

I am not a germaphobe. I keep this identity by avoiding news about germs found in ice cubes at restaurants, on the refrigerator door handle, on the restroom door, or the grocery cart handle.  
I feel this is too much information. There is little I can do about it, short of being a Purell addict or avoiding public areas. I already have enough to worry about.
That said, I totally get why the world might be grossing you out if you’re a Purell addict or a germaphobe yourself. 
While not a germaphobe I never, ever put my purse on the bathroom floor. …read more

Have you heard of Zafu.com? I read about this in O Magazine last week. It’s brilliant – if it works.
You can find your perfect jeans or bra fit by answering a short survey about your personal body type, so they claim.
The site will break it down by how likely the jeans or bra are to fit you, price range, length, style of leg, etc.
My perfect fit jean is a Lucky Easy Rider for around $100, according to Zafu.
If it works it would save a lot of miserable trying-on in a florescent dressing room. If I limit what I try on to the most …read more

Am I alone in breathing a huge sigh of relief that low-waisted jeans appear to be out?
I heard Sarah Jessica Parker, say on Oprah, that her new line Bitten includes no low-waisted jeans because she’s over it. I’ve been over it since they were in.
Hallelujah!
Let’s face it, during the low-waisted trend I’ve been non-16. I’ve been doing feminine things like having babies and nursing them and lugging them around on my hip, which often causes shirts to ride up. Such things are not conducive to wearing low-rise pants, the sole intention of which is to let a little tummy show. No thank you.
Bitten offers such …read more