Why Is Public Speaking — in shoes — So Scary?

admin — Wed, 07 Jun 2006 14:37:30 +0000

It has been said that public speaking tops the list of almost all irrational fears. Often we believe speaking in public means giving a speech in front of a giant audience. (in their underwear ) — but for some of us, it can mean simply talking to others.

Recently a friend told me about a National group called, Toast Masters International. This community-structured group promises:

You’ll become a better speaker and leader and gain confidence to succeed in whatever path you’ve chosen in life.

Deliver great presentations
Easily lead teams and conduct meetings
Give and receive constructive evaluations
Be a better listener

I know people who have joined Toast Masters and they believe that it changed their life.

I applaud them, but I discovered a slightly different (and cheaper) way to cure my fear of public speaking — fabulous shoes:

One dark winter morning, I left my house for the train to NYC, took a cab to my office, sat down at my desk, prepared for a meeting I had with a client and then put my materials in my brief case.

As I headed out the door, I looked down and realized that I was wearing a different patent leather pump on each foot! (It was the ’90’s — every girl had to have a few pairs of patent pumps). How did I not notice this?!

Now what was I going to do? Forget that my fellow commuters must have thought I was nuts. At that moment, I had minutes to make the meeting, and convince clients that I was intelligent enough to handle their business.

There was no time to go to Bloomingdales for another pair of shoes…and I didn’t have spares under my desk.

omygodomygodomyGAAAWWD!

I pulled myself together, went to the meeting, presented the new ad campaign and got the job.

But what about the shoes? How was I able to deal with the embarrassment of my absent-mindedness and brilliantly present to these people?

I told them that I had just had surgery on my left foot and it was still swollen. Not only did I get the job, but I also got compliments on both shoes!

In other words, my profound fears of humilation and probable termination (totally different studies in self-improvement) far out-weighed my fears of inadequacy and self-doubt, as they relate to speaking in public. From that moment on I felt secure enough with my speaking abilities to handle any public forum.

Tell me about your harrowing public speaking moments…you will feel better, I promise.