We’ve reached the end of our Goin’ to the Chapel series with Molly McDonald, and if you’ve stuck it out this far you’ve gained some tips on how to:

• Stay within your wedding budget without stressing out over money.
• Create your wedding guest list so that it matches your budget and pleases both you and your soon-to-be spouse.
• Determine whether or not your nerves can handle children at the wedding, as well as how to prepare your wedding for children or politely let adult guests know they should leave the kiddies with a babysitter.
• Deal with the anxiety an unwanted wedding arrival may cause.

To wrap up, Molly has a few words of advice about wedding etiquette:

How formal your setting is determines how you can word requests about “potentially touchy” situations on the invites, i.e. “no children please,” “alcohol-free,” and “please don’t bring guests.”

Of course, there are also ways to go about these situations without putting a printing in your invites, such as mentioning them in conversation. Generally, people will do what they can to make sure your day is as pleasant as possible, if you ask them in a pleasant way.

In other words, there’s no need to stress out about how people will respond to your wedding etiquette requests. Design your invitations so that your expectations are clear, and feel free to mention your requests in conversation. Like Molly points out, your guests will most likely want to make your day as pleasant and stress-free as possible, and if that means leaving their children with a babysitter or forgoing the booze for a couple of hours, then so be it.

That’s all for Mental Health Notes’ stress-free wedding series – a big thank you to Molly! To check out all posts, simply visit the main Goin’ to the Chapel post where you’ll find links to each tip. And, if you want to know more about Molly and her freelance design services, visit Molly McDonald Design.

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There’s still plenty of time to toot your own horn in Mental Health Notes’ This Is Why I Rock! series – sign up today!

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Goin’ To The Chapel: Don’t Stress About Wedding Etiquette

Anyway…

First, let’s take a look back at some of the things that have gone on here at Mental Health Notes this week. We kicked off the stress-busting Goin’ to the Chapel series with Molly McDonald (which wraps up later today), learned how Harry Potter saved J.K. Rowling’s sanity, took a really brief peek into possible new French legislation regarding eating disorders, and pondered the University of Virginia’s new policy on students with mental illness. Oh, and of course, I’m still accepting applications for This Is Why I ROCK!

Next, let’s get up to speed with what’s going on with advocacy groups. The Depression and Bipolar Support Alliance (DBSA) April newsletter is online with information about postpartum depression legislation and about about peer services and training, as well as discounts on the DBSA 2008 National Conference. The UIC National Research and Training Center and the NAMI STAR Center are conducting the cultural competence survey regarding consumer-run mental health programs. And, in honor of Mental Health Month (it’s in May – just around the corner!), Mental Health America has developed the Get Connected theme.

Now, let’s acknowledge some scientific-, research-, and government-related mental health news. Last week, the Health Subcommittee of the U.S. House of Representatives’ Energy and Commerce Committee approved legislation (H.R. 5613) to block proposed federal Medicaid regulations, including limits on rehabilitation services for people with mental health problems. Small businesses and the insurance industry haven’t succeeded in beating back mental health parity in Arizona this time around. New research suggests anxious or depressed children are more likely to grow up and work occupations that cause anxiety and depression.

And, finally, what’s going on in the rest of b5media’s Science & Health Channel? Angelique weighs in on the French bill to stop media promotion of “extreme thinness” over at Breaking the Mirror. Ruth at Eating Fabulous tells us about the cognitive and motor development benefits of omega-3 fatty acids for babies. Mary Emma Allen honors Charlton Heston’s Alzheimer’s battle and nods to her co-blogger Liz Lewis’s tribute, as well as Jean Murray’s thoughts on the matter.

That’s all for this week! If you have any Saturday Sanity-worthy news, send it my way and I’ll get it in next week’s edition!

Image credits and sources here, here, here, and here.

Post from: Blisstree

Saturday Sanity: Upgrade Your Brain

Unless you have a super fantastic relationship with your soon-to-be husband’s ex-fiancee, the thought of having her at the wedding probably stresses you out a lot a bit.

They were together for five years. His parents adored her. They were even engaged to be married!

Yep, that kind of wedding guest could make even the most collected of brides feel anxious.

Fortunately, in today’s installment of Goin’ to the Chapel, Molly McDonald offers some tips on how to manage the stress of those unwanted wedding arrivals.

5 Tips to Manage the Stress of an Unwanted Wedding Guest

Many brides and grooms have that “friend” of their significant other’s he or she prays gets sick the weekend of the wedding so they won’t show up. It’s okay, there are plenty of ways to prevent your stress from becoming a tragedy:

1. Use your busyness as an out! Simply excuse yourself for the next big thing.
2. Make use of your bridesmaids. They are there to help you, right? Ask them to come get you for something if you look stuck, or have them start a conversation so you can politely excuse yourself. These girls are your best friends; they’ll know when you’re struggling.
3. Rely on your adrenaline. You will be so happy about your marriage, you will be nice regardless!
4. Hope for some consideration. You are going to have so much to do and so many people to talk to, half the time your “unwanted guest” will see this and not bother you since you guys aren’t that close anyway.
5. Remember: It’s YOUR day, and only YOU can let someone ruin it.

We’ll wrap up the Goin’ to the Chapel series tomorrow with tips on how to determine the proper etiquette for your wedding.

Molly McDonald is a freelance designer helping people get patents on their concepts while also patenting her own. Medical products are her personal favorites because she finds them most rewarding. Molly graduated with a Bachelor’s of Industrial Design with a minor in business and, when she’s not designing and patenting, she’s enjoying photography and studio art! For more, visit Molly McDonald Design.

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Want to be part of a Mental Health Notes series? Check out the upcoming This Is Why I Rock! and enter today!

Post from: Blisstree

Goin’ To The Chapel: Managing The Stress Of Unwanted Wedding Arrivals

Anyway, ladies: If you’ve been keeping up with the Mental Health Notes Goin’ to the Chapel series to get some help reducing stress while you plan – and carry out – you’re wedding, then you may be interested in this little tidbit of news, too.

According to a study published in February’s issue of the Journal of Family Psychology (see, psychology is in here somewhere!), marriages do well if the woman is more attractive than the man.

I don’t have my hands on the actual study, but from the Yahoo! News article:

• “Overall, wives and husbands behaved more positively when the woman was better looking.”
• “In couples with more attractive husbands, both partners were less supportive of one another. McNulty suggests wives mirror, in some ways, the level of support they get from husbands.”
• “‘The husband who’s less physically attractive than his wife is getting something more than maybe he can expect to get,’ McNulty told LiveScience. ‘He’s getting something better than he’s providing at that level. So he’s going to work hard to maintain that relationship.’”

The Yahoo! News article itself, Why Beautiful Women Marry Less Attractive Men, is worth a read. I’d love to know what you think.

Don’t forget to check out Mental Health Notes’ This Is Why I Rock! series, and join today!

Post from: Blisstree

Hey Brides-to-Be: Hope You’re Hotter Than Your Men!

Thus far in the Mental Health Notes Goin’ to the Chapel series, Molly McDonald has offered tips on how to stay within a wedding budget and keep a wedding guest list practical, all while avoiding becoming overstressed.

Today, Molly takes the wedding guest list theme a bit further and addresses the issue of children as wedding guests.

Should you invited them? If so, what kinds of preparations should you make for them? And, how can you politely tell parents who are invited that their children are not?

Read on for Molly’s answers!

Some people love to have children at their weddings, and that’s great! However, not everyone feels comfortable having very young wedding guests. Some ladies have nightmares of munchkins running up to you with cake-covered hands aimed towards your lovely dress you’ve been looking forward to wearing your whole life!

If you do want to invite children, consider hiring a babysitter for the event. Make sure it is someone you trust with children, and it might mean hiring two if there will be numerous small ones.

If you don’t want to invite children, and you either don’t want or can’t afford to hire a babysitter, there are still appropriate ways to address the issue with your guests. When you’re casually talking to someone you’ve invited that has children who are not of a wedding-appropriate age and you fear they might be considering bringing them, you can politely say, “I’ve decided not to hire a sitter for the wedding. Anyone I trust with children is invited to the ceremony. Just a heads up so you can be thinking about who could sit for you that day.” Something casual, comfortable, and making it sound like you are doing them a favor by telling them in advance. In reality, you are doing them a favor! Now they can plan ahead for it.

Check back in tomorrow when we address perhaps the most stressful kinds of wedding guest of all – the exes, their new significant others, etc. – you know, those guests you really hoped wouldn’t attend!

Molly McDonald is a freelance designer helping people get patents on their concepts while also patenting her own. Medical products are her personal favorites because she finds them most rewarding. Molly graduated with a Bachelor’s of Industrial Design with a minor in business and, when she’s not designing and patenting, she’s enjoying photography and studio art! For more, visit Molly McDonald Design.

Image source and credit.

Interested in being involved in another Mental Health Notes series? I’m accepting applications for This Is Why I ROCK!

Post from: Blisstree

Goin’ To The Chapel: Should You Invite Children Or Keep It Adult-Only?

During yesterday’s installment of our Goin’ to the Chapel series, freelance designer Molly McDonald shared tips on how to stay within your wedding budget in order to help you stay stress-free while planning your wedding.

Today, Molly tackles the issue of the wedding guest list.

Who do you invite? Everyone from your best friend to your old high school cheerleading squad to your mother’s fifth cousin twice removed? Wouldn’t that be expensive? Or do you narrow it down, including only your closest friends and relatives? In that case, what if someone’s feelings get hurt?

Yes, I imagine making a guest list for a wedding could be rather stressful.

So read on to find out how Molly constructed her own wedding invitation list, and why she thinks her tips will help you create your own.

3 Steps to Creating Your Wedding Guest List

At first I wanted to invite everyone I knew to the wedding, until I realized how much that would cost. Below are the steps I followed to finalize my list:

1. Collect the list of guests from both sets of parents. Calculate those, plus both of your parties, and their guests. You’ll be surprised on the total.
2. Make two separate lists: “Bride’s Hopeful Guests” and “Groom’s Hopeful Guests.” Count this up, and don’t forget to account for their guests, if you’ve decided to do let them bring one.
3. Figure out how much it would cost to host all of these people. If it is out of your budget, you can downsize, making sure both give and take on who to invite.

Having trouble narrowing the list? This is what I did:

I only invited those who are close to me now, or have been really close to in the past but have simply lost everyday communication with because life gets so hectic! I’ve made a lot of friends in college, but you better believe I’m not inviting everyone in my cell phone! Invite those who mean the most to you now and will long-term.

Later, if someone says, “I haven’t gotten my invitation yet” and you don’t plan on inviting them, just say, “I’m really sorry, we had to cut the guest list short due to limited space. It’s only family and some long-time family friends now.” You can still invite them to the engagement party to celebrate with them, but as for the wedding, don’t feel obligated. They’ll understand. They’d rather you tell them in advance then to find out after the wedding and be offended.

Tomorrow, we’ll tackle those adorable little wedding guests that aren’t always invited to the formal ceremony: Children.

Molly McDonald is a freelance designer helping people get patents on their concepts while also patenting her own. Medical products are her personal favorites because she finds them most rewarding. Molly graduated with a Bachelor’s of Industrial Design with a minor in business and, when she’s not designing and patenting, she’s enjoying photography and studio art! For more, visit Molly McDonald Design.

Image source and credit.

Interested in being involved in another Mental Health Notes series? I’m accepting applications for This Is Why I ROCK!

Post from: Blisstree

Goin’ To The Chapel: Revamping Your Wedding Guest List

Hmm…if you’re just tuning in, you’re probably a bit surprised by this post’s title. Fret not – I assure you Mental Health Notes is still a mental health blog! However, because wedding season is right around the corner, I’m currently hosting this Goin’ to the Chapel series with the fabulous Molly McDonald to help brides plan and enjoy stress-free weddings – or, as stress-free as a wedding can be!

To get us started, Molly has outlined three major ways for a bride to stay within her wedding budget. Pretty good way to get the ball rollin’, in my opinion. After all, isn’t money one of the top things we all stress about?

Read on!

3 Tips to Keep Within or UNDER Your Budget

1. Start planning and shopping as soon as you get engaged. Even before hand, if you’d like, just to get some ideas. Do your research on what you think you want to have as bridesmaid/groomsmen gifts, guest favors, and food. Compare prices! Think of alternate online sources such as Overstock.com for favors.
2. Become a DIY-er! Some of the bulk of budget planning is spent on paper: Invitations, save-the-date cards, envelopes, etc., so why not cut down on the mark-up all the design places are going to charge you? Find a design you like, and then figure out how to do it yourself! For instance, if you like square with two colors, check out papers at Hobby Lobby, Michael’s, or local craft store and see if you can’t print, cut, and assemble yourself. I am doing a 6”x6” honeydew card w/a 4”x4” ivory card in the middle of it that has all the invitation information on it. The beauty of it? Scrapbook paper is 12”x12”, so I get 4 of the larger squares and 9 of the smaller per page! Then an Exacto knife and ruler to cut them out, and we’ll have it done in no time. Save-the-date cards can be postcards, since most people don’t save those anyway. Find a heavy stock, bright color, or design a pattern and have it printed at Office Max or Depot. You’ll also save on postage this way!
3. Decide ahead of time what you’d rather spend the most money on. That is a personal choice for each bride; so don’t let others influence your decision to spend more on their food if that means you don’t get the dress you prefer! It’s your day, right?!

Be sure to check back tomorrow for some pointers on creating your wedding guest list: To invite, or not to invite – that will be the question!

Molly McDonald is a freelance designer helping people get patents on their concepts while also patenting her own. Medical products are her personal favorites because she finds them most rewarding. Molly graduated with a Bachelor’s of Industrial Design with a minor in business and, when she’s not designing and patenting, she’s enjoying photography and studio art! For more, visit Molly McDonald Design.

Image source and credit.

Interested in being involved in another Mental Health Notes series? I’m accepting applications for This Is Why I ROCK!

Post from: Blisstree

Goin’ To The Chapel: Staying Within Your Wedding Budget

No, no, no. I’m not getting married. What I am doing, however, is offering up some tips for stress-free weddings for those of you who are!

June kicks off the unofficial wedding season, and I thought it’d be nice to help all the brides out there prepare for their big days in plenty of time with some tips on how to handle the various aspects of planning weddings – and carrying out those plans – stress-free!

Helping me is Molly McDonald, a freelance designer (and a sort of Jill of all trades – check her out at Molly McDonald Design!), who is definitely an expert in the field.

Why?

Because Molly managed to handle her wedding preparations while withdrawing from Cymbalta!  I tip my hat (or veil, if I ever don one) to any lady who can do that.

To kick off this Goin’ to the Chapel series, Molly would like to offer some words every bride should remember regarding her big day:

First and foremost…It’s YOUR day! It’s your day to celebrate your love for each other. That includes wearing what you want to wear, how many guests you want there, the food you want to serve (if any), whether there is alcohol or not, the venue, etc. There will be problems that arise, but there is always a solution, and you CAN be calm and collected about it, not Bridezilla!

Well said! During this week, you can expect to see Molly’s stress-free wedding tips on the following subjects:

• Staying within your wedding budget.
• Revamping your wedding guest list.
• Deciding whether your wedding will be child-friendly or adult-only.
• Handling those unwanted wedding arrivals.
• Determining wedding etiquette.

So, be sure to join Molly and me as we discover the secrets to planning – and enjoying – a stress-free wedding!

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Interested in participating in another one of Mental Health Notes’ series? Then don’t forget to join This Is Why I ROCK!

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Mental Health Notes Is Goin’ To The Chapel!