“[I'm] not necessarily a bachelor, but I look at marriage as not for me. Maybe that will change at some point, but right now, I see many of my married friends who are so miserable. And I’m looking at that thinking, ‘Man, maybe I don’t need that.’”

I think Jamie sounds very young there and he’s not that young. He’s in his 40s, right? That’s too much life experience to write off an entire way of living because he knows some unhappily married people. Every marriage goes through it’s rough patches, nothing is perfect forever.

Sometimes people expect too much – too much from their partners, too much from their employers, too much from life in general.

 You get back what you put into something. You want a good marriage, then you chose your partner carefully, put in the hard work, and think of it terms of a life-long adventure and not a weekend party.
 

Image credit: All Posters.com

Post from: Blisstree

Jamie Foxx and Marriage

Hollywood star Jamie Foxx has banned his teenage daughter from dating after the press confused the 14-year-old girl for the actor’s latest flame.

According to contactmusic.com, the actor/singer admits he’s become overprotective of his young daughter, Corrine, because men often think she’s twice her age.

“She’s not going to date until she’s married. She’s so beautiful…I was coming out of a restaurant with her, I guess the paparazzi didn’t know who she was, and the paper said, ‘Foxx with young hottie’. It just kills you because she’s so grown, but she’s only 14,” he said.

I hope that he’s only joking – it’s not Corrine’s fault that she looks older. The fact that she looks older does not mean that feels older or will act older. Allowing kids to date, it’s a trust thing – you’ve got to trust the teen, you’ve got to trust their date – and it’s not easy, but I’ve found that the more rules and restrictions you put on your teen, the more they try to sneak around. You cannot be with them 24 hours a day and at some point they have to learn to make smart decisions for themselves.

My daughter is 16 and she’s been dating since she was 14. She would have been allowed to go out on group dates before that point, but she really wasn’t that interested. She liked boys, but she knew that she didn’t want the responsibility of a boyfriend.  Don’t tell her that I’m sharing this, but I think she was afraid of the first kiss and she used to make jokes about how she’d high five her groom instead of kissing him at the end of her marriage ceremony.  That sounds incredibly young and innocent doesn’t it?  Well at the time she said it, she was frequently mistaken for an adult. The way a kid looks on the inside it does not always have a direct correlation to how they feel on the inside.

Young girls, sometimes they develop early (I was one of these girls) and can bring on unwelcome comments and stares. The girl cannot help how the people around her act, but the boys her age, chances are not going to push things any farther than the young girl would. We have this idea that all kids are totally hormonally and sexed-up, but that’s how we adults think, not most 14 year-old boys. My daughter talks to me all the time about being a virgin when she gets married. This is something that her pediatrician has talked to her about, as well. I have never pushed abstinence.  I hope that she waits until she’s ready (no mom really wants to think about her daughter being sexually active), but in the meantime I talk to her about being safe, not abstinent.  She has a serious boyfriend now. They spend a lot of time together and she’s still sure that this is what she wants. I respect her commitment to what she knows is right for her.

It’s very hard, but at a certain point, you’ve got to loosen those apron strings and let your teen out into the world, at least on a trial basis.  Dating is practice and teens are definitely people in need of practice. So, Jamie Foxx, I advise you to relax a little. Tell your daughter to put another layer on, if it makes you more comfortable, but those teenage years fly by and before you know it, she’s going to be out on her own in the world. Wouldn’t you like her out there with at least a clue of how to take care of herself on a date? If she looks mature now, what do you thinks she’s going to look like at 18?  And those 14-year-old boys, well I’m fairly certain that by 18, they will have sex on their mind.  And parents, the same is true for teenage boys – they need to learn how to act around girls, as well.

Let them learn how to relate to their peers of the opposite sex. Your child will let you know when they are ready for this step – it’s scary, but teens have been growing up and going on dates for years. You cannot keep them children forever.

What do you think?  What age did you begin dating at?  If you have kids or when you do have kids, what age do you feel is an appropriate age to begin dating?

Post from: Blisstree

An Argument In Favor of Teen Dating