As the sun begins to creep in my window – my eyes open and I begin the daily string of promises I make to myself each and every day.

The one promise I try hardest to stick to is to not cave in to my husbands need to create conflict.

Don’t get me wrong, his conflict seeking isn’t something that happens every single day, but my anticipating it is.

Sometimes we can tell early on if it’s going to be one of those days where he is bent on conflict and will do just about anything to pick a fight – but other days it may be well into the afternoon or evening before the signs begin to emerge.

We have learned to avoid those attacks for the most part – however, I do have a few hot buttons he knows to push when he is really seeking a fight. Each and every time, I let him push those buttons and I react.

I have to wonder what other people do to avoid those confrontations and conflicts? You’d think five years of this would be enough for me to have mastered the skill. The only thing I know to do is to play the game of avoidance.  I avoid him at all cost – this means watching television in another room – diving into my work in a way the world could disappear and I’d never know it – or I go to bed early with a prayer tomorrow will be a better day.

What is the best way to keep from fighting and engaging in conflict with someone who is purposely seeking confrontation?

Image credit: Stock.xchng

Post from: Blisstree

The Ongoing Battle of the Minds

Last Thursday, Chato B. Stewart rocked our funny bones with his mental health humor. This Thursday, Ken Jensen puts us through psychiatric boot camp with his system for surviving bipolar disorder.

As if my nauseatingly incessant play on words didn’t give it away, 39-year-old Ken Jensen is a former soldier – not just any soldier, but a Marine. (“A MARINE!” I’m reminded of Marty Maraschino in Grease every time I say that. What can I say? I’ve always been partial to the devil dogs – ex-husband aside.)

Add to his resume author, speaker, motivator, and entrepreneur (as well as self-proclaimed former bipolar disorder victim), and this Tillson, NY resident may just leave your mental muscles begging for rest, yet ready to take on your own brain and shouting ooh rah the entire way!

Enough of that. Ken truly is an amazingly down to earth, no bull, bottomline kind of guy. Let’s let him tell his story!

I own www.ittakesgutstobeme.com, and I offer a system to people to relieve themselves of their bipolar or depression disorders. My system was tested on myself as I struggled to survive my bipolar. I was dying from it as my mind and body were failing. Prison, lockdown ward, and death were my coming future. I’d already lived through all three, to include death, but I was running out of juice to keep up the fight.

I followed all doctors’ instructions to a “T”. By this, I mean I ate every pill they prescribed me for a six-year period. This equated to thousands of pills; over 100 individual prescriptions for almost every psychotropic applicable. I only got worse with each passing month.

During my last psychiatric visit, the doctor told me he was just about out of options and he wasn’t hopeful. This news terrified me like nothing had before in my life. I was going to die, horribly insane. I decided to look elsewhere for help and luckily, I found it.

I then began weaning myself off my meds, with the help of professionals, (NEVER just stop your meds!) while replacing them with nutrients I was lacking. I improved rapidly and for the first time since I’d been diagnosed, 6 years ago, I began to hope I’d be OK.

I improved enough to realize I needed even more help to sort out all that was wrong with me. I’d been through too much trauma in too many areas to get away with just addressing nutrition, powerful, though that step was.

And that’s where the rest of my system came from. I experimented on myself. I got ripped off and misled, frequently. Some tools were good but not meant for me. The items that worked, I kept. Now? You’d have to put a gun to my head to make me stop doing these steps that keep me healthy to this day. I have been meds-free for over two years.

Just so we’re clear: I am no doctor but my system works. Thousands have proven many of the individual steps I espouse to be effective. This is without the addition of the rest of my steps. The testimonials of those who’d gone before me are what gave me the faith to try what I did. I simply combined the best of the best.

My reversal back to a “normal” individual, and my consequent bettering of myself to a level never before experienced, caused all who knew me to suggest authoring a book about my journey. The change was strikingly profound. That led me to some pros who helped me get to where I’m at now.

I have two books written, and I’ve produced multiple articles, videos, and audio sessions all aimed at bringing others to what I know to be true. “It Takes Guts To Be Me: How An Ex-Marine Beat Bipolar Disorder” is going to the printing press as I write this. “What Does Bipolar Disorder Look Like?” is a collection of articles describing the world of the bipolar mind. I wrote it so that supporters will better understand the daily battle that their loved ones endure.

This entire project has recently morphed into a much broader goal of motivating people to do better in this life; to give hope to those who hear my story, no matter why they suffer. If I don’t maintain my vigilance, which is not hard at all, my bipolar will come back. I know this. But it is just one part of who I am and it is in my past. I work hard to build the life of my dreams and I want to take as many new friends with me as I can possibly fit in my metaphorical car!

Please have a look at who’s talking to you: http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&videoid=23590024

And thank you, Alicia for the great work that you do!

Thank you, Ken!

If you’d like to read some of Ken’s work, check out this article (in addition to his Web site, of course!), and be sure to thank him for sharing with us why he ROCKS!

This post was part of the Mental Health Notes This Is Why I ROCK! series. If you’re living with mental illness and rocking out at whatever you do, sign up to show off!

Post from: Blisstree

Bipolar Survivor Ken Jensen Explains Why It Takes Guts To Be Him

Wow, May is going to be a busy month here at Mental Health Notes, huh? Not only is it Mental Health Awareness Month and my blirthday (as Angelique called it!), but it’s also the month for the This Is Why I ROCK! series, which is what we’re beginning right now!

Read on to find out why mental health cartoonist Chato B. Stewart ROCKS!

The smiling face you see to the right is 37-year-old Chato B. Stewart from Port Charlotte, Florida, and he definitely embodies the whole spirit of the This Is Why I ROCK! series. Not only is he an avid mental health advocate, but he is also a married father of four who, during some rocky times learning to not just survive – but to live with – bipolar disorder, discovered the joy of cartooning.

Chato is an inspiring man indeed, and I invite you all to read his story and check out his hilarious mental health humor!

A Massachusetts native, Chato B. Stewart and his family moved to Florida seven years ago, where he was finally diagnosed with bipolar disorder (”and a few other things, to boot” he says).

Chato went through a familiarly hellish process many of us go through, whether it’s before or after the diagnosis of mental illness, which included trying medications that initially worked then fell short of effective; experiencing psychotic breaks that led to trips to the local Crisis Stabilization Unit; trying new medications; losing health insurance; deciding to make a go of it without medication; and doing it all with family members who may or may not really understand what’s going on.

So, how did Chato go from struggling with mental illness to virtually kicking its ass with artistic abilities and sense of mental health humor? I’ll let him tell you.

While on vacation in Crisis Stabilization Unit (CSU) in March 2008, I started to journal, but it came out like a comic book… I just drew cartoons about my stay, and when my vacation was over I had a thought. Wow, humor can really help heal! Why don’t we see cartoons about mental health from our perspective? You know, how we, as consumers see events and things might be funny or humorous in a cartoon. I searched the web and only found a few but mostly they were about the therapist, or psychiatrist or joke with someone on a couch…

So, I thought, and I will quote the kids Animated film Robots, “See a need, fill a need.” I could help fill the need by drawing cartoons about a subject that many people would want to avoid talking about… Mental Health! Maybe with the cartoons, I can help a few consumers by putting a smile on their faces using humor to heal. So, after making sure this idea was not some grandiosity symptom of my Bipolar Disorder, I set about making and drawing the cartoons.

I’m happy to say we are off to a good start; www.MentalHealthHumor.com had almost 2,000 visitors this month alone and we have posted 10 cartoons and have more on the way. We also have been contacted by a few mental health websites interested in using the cartoons for their site and maybe in some publications. Hey, I know my humor and website might not be for every one, but from the many comments I have received I can see it doing some good… So after all, maybe I don’t ROCK, but I do know, I’m a productive pebble in this ocean we call life.

Well, I disagree. I certainly think Chato ROCKS!

Because his cartoons have been published locally and are gaining attention from other mental health Web sites, Chato knows he’s “a professional cartoonist in some sense of the word,” but still considers his cartooning a hobby that he hopes to one day take to the next level.

Professional endeavor or enjoyable past time, his mental health humor cartoons have helped bring Chato successes for which we should all strive.

Not to quote James Bond, but in Tomorrow Never Dies – there was a line I liked, it goes “The distance between genius and insanity is measured only by success”. Well so far, I’m not a successful millionaire, but I measure success in other ways. One, of course, is family success, and the next would be for me, successfully using tools and coping skills to prevent my disorder from causing distress to my family.

It helps me focus and some times I just get lost in the idea and it brings a peace to an otherwise distorted mind.

For more information about Chato and his mental health humor and cartoons, visit his Web site, Mental Health Humor. And above all else, be sure to let him know he ROCKS!

This post is part of the Mental Health Notes This Is Why I ROCK! series. If you have a mental illness and are still living the life you love, head on over the the official announcement post and enter!

Post from: Blisstree

Success Story: Using Mental Health Humor As A Coping Skill