Having my Mac down is simultaneously like being lost and cut-off from part of myself and liberating – like being let off my leash.

I imagine it will be the same with my iPhone – which I don’t have yet, but. . .

I find my cell phone so stupidly lame that I don’t use most of its features. I know my experience with my future iPhone will be much more attached. I know I will love it like I love my Mac. I’m a little afraid to get it for fear I’ll be strapped to it and stop living a real tangible life. I think my husband and I are both willing to stop eating for two months to buy 2 iPhones.

Yesterday, I found myself watching Apple’s stock. I don’t own Mac’s stock, but if there’s a company I’m pulling for – it’s Apple.  When I heard Steve Jobs was sick, I had actual anxiety.

Why? Dude they’re inventing the next version of a book. It’s said to be like Kindle, but I know, know, know it’s going to be so much better. It will probably write books just for me based on my tastes and past book buying history. It will fit in my back pocket and last for a billion years. It will make me feel wonderful and excited and smart.

Be healthy Steve, keep the stock up.

Post from: Blisstree

Love Note to Apple

I look like a pretty nice, normal person don’t I? With that Mac I look competent. Some people have even confused me as someone who is technologically savvy because I have a website, a Mac and a camera.

When learning new technological skills – a new computer program or application or trying to navigate a new website or plug-in, then why do I get so irrationally frustrated?

My head starts to feel pressure, my neck gets stiff and tense, my arms and hands feel pulled like rubber-bands, my blood pressure goes up, I stop breathing and begin holding my breath.

For the first few minutes I try this and that – oh, I can figure this out, I think.

I look at the help and know it will be no help to me because the same Geeks who invented the program also wrote the help file – HIRE an ungeek to write the help files! I want to scream in your face.

By now I’m just angry and beyond frustrated. I feel like smoke may come out my eye sockets. There’s pressure between my temples and I have to remind myself to breath. I’m grinding my teeth and my jaw hurts a little. I feel like my chest is stretched taunt like a rubber band that might break. It’s quite similar to the feeling I had all the time when quitting smoking.

It’s me or you all this angry must be directed at. I choose you – I don’t care if its fair. Out of pure self-preservation and the awareness that I have to hang out with me for the rest of the day – I choose nameless, faceless Geeks as the subject of my fury. I fantasize about kicking geek ass. Yeah, I want to smash your face in for making this program too difficult for me to understand or making too many hoops for me to jump through – yeah, I’m talking to YOU – guy who thought adding a symbol, a number, and a capitol letter to passwords would be a good idea. I HATE THAT IDEA! I have no capacity for remembering it. At least write “password has a symbol, a capitol, and a number” next to the password blank when I return. Is that too much to ask?

I start cursing in my head. stupid bleeping, bleeping thing, what’s wrong with those bleeping, bleep bleep geek-bleep, bleep, bleep bleep, BLEEP!

Who I am? What have I become over downloading a photo into the proper file or blacking out a word?

Worse than anything is when I feel like I DO know how to do something – or at least I DID know how to do something but, for some reason some geek thought they should “update” a program. You know I’m actually looking for an out-dated version of Photoshop because I won’t have to relearn the whole freaking program – which I’ve already done quite enough times already. You impress other geeks, but it not me. I want it to be the way it was when I knew how to use it. I don’t want to keep relearning the same thing over and over again. I applaud your ingenious ingenuity and inventiveness Geeks, but only AFTER I know how to use it. Until then you are my evil nemesis!

So I salute you for ruling the world Geeks. But, I have these self-imposed deadlines for myself and I missed mine today because I couldn’t figure out how to black out a name. It’s such a simple thing – but I wasted too much precious time trying to figure it out. I had to call my husband and email the file to him and ask him to send it back.

I LOATH asking for his help. I take the smirk and the roll of the eyes that says, “geez, it’s not that hard” personally.

I know this about myself and still, every time I am a little surprised by my own reaction, a little shocked at how furious and frustrated I am over what should be something simple.

It’s like when the really fit woman at my gym complains when we do something new – she likes to be good at things, she doesn’t like learning them and feeling incompetent.

Same here. I like technology – after I learn it and when it makes me feel smart and accomplished – but not when it makes me feel like a simple failure.

Please tell me I’m not the only one experiencing this technological frustration.

A smart and emotionally mature person, and I like to think of myself as a smart and emotionally mature person, walks away until she calms down and can have more patience with her inadequacies.

Off to have some liver-cleansing hot tea and a biscotti. I may have to do some yoga before I try again.

Post from: Blisstree

Technology and Emotional Maturity

Am I the only one who pretends I’m Bill Gates watching those Apple commercials? How does Bill Gates feel watching those commercials?

It makes me giggle because it’s true. It’s sooo true.

And it’s about freaking time they included some women.

OK – I just love that they called her genius instead of geek. Not that I don’t love the name, Geek Squad. I so do. I just love that they were presumptuous enough to use the word Genius.

Post from: Blisstree

Apple Commercials