Road trip home for the holidays?

Traveling with a loved one, especially for new couples, can be tricky. Here are a few tips to help make sure your holiday travel plans don’t lead to a stocking full of coal.

*Decide on a route ahead of time. Try to make this as democratic as possible. If you get your way on the route, be open to conceding on some other point later on.

*When planning the route, take into account rest stops. Spending hours in the car can lead to boredom and tension. It might be a good idea to stop somewhere midway for some alone time. A short walk or some shopping – anything to give you a fresh point of view. Venturing out on your own will give you both something new to talk about, as well.

*Before you get on the road, designate the Map Reader. The Map Reader will be in charge of making sure you stay on track. The non-Map Reader should allow the Map Reader to make the decisions – this will cut down on fighting for control of the map. Getting lost or finding the way, whatever, it’s all a shared adventure anyway, right?

*What do you listen to? If your tastes in music are not in sync, then it’s going to be time to get democratic again. One of you chooses the tunes, the other chooses the next meal stop. Bring cds as radio signals can be tricky out in the middle of nowhere. This could be a good time to listen to some of those oldies you have previously listened to only in secret. A game of “remember when…” could recharge the conversation and sharing memories builds intimacy.

*Take some healthy snacks. Arriving with a bellyache is never a good beginning to a family holiday. I have a collapsible cooler that works well for trips. It has wheels on the bottom, so we’ve used it for many family outings, too. Fill yours with something fresh like fruit slices, string cheese, plenty of water.

*Bring your own pillow. This has nothing to do with traveling with your boyfriend, it’s just really good advice.

*Have realistic expectations for the trip. Your family might not love your boyfriend the way you do. That’s fine. I’ve found that the best way to ingratiate my man with my family is to say, “Hey, Steve’s great with the drinks (chopping, cooking of any sort).” The ladies in my family love a man in the kitchen. Find a similar way to highlight your guy’s strengths.

*Try to relax. If this is your maiden voyage, you’ll gain valuable insight for next year. Nothing is going to go perfectly. Accept that and move on.

*Try to have fun – it’s the holidays after all.

image credit: All Posters.com

Post from: Blisstree

How To Survive A Road Trip With Your Man

I’m not talking about a break up. A break up can’t hold a candle to it. A break up is nothing compared to it.

I’m talking about not seeing him again. Ever. Even if you try your hardest. There’s no chance of bumping into him. No anonymous calls or sms. Nothing. You’ll never hear from him ever again.

Losing him. A period to a sentence. A life lived without his existence. Gone. Nada. Kaput.

Yea, you lost him but you do have memories.

I lost my father recently. The one man I know who loves me unconditionally. The one man who accepts me. And, I’d like to think, the one man whose eyes lit up the first time he gazed upon me — holding me in his arms — cuz he knew he’ll love me forever.

This loss caused me to fear a bit. To ask questions. To wonder if I’ll ever find a man who would want to spend the rest of his life loving me.

Meanwhile, all I can do is hope. Trust that if it’s my fate to find such a man then it’ll come to pass.

With sadness, I think about my loss. With joyful anticipation, I look forward to the man who will show me that such a love, though not perfect, is still possible.

Author note: I apologise if some would find this post irrelevant to the blog’s topic. I needed to share this insight, however personal it may seem.

Post from: Blisstree

Losing Him

However, there are men who need not resort to rudeness or callous behaviours to be called men. They see no need to break necks or be serial monogomists to exercise their manhood. They respect women; are gentlemen; know things such as honour and chivalry.

In and around relationships, whether platonic or romantic, men will find themselves in a situation wherein they have to balance their masculinity in dealing with women. Perhaps asking the question, “what should a man do or say in this given situation?” Or “should I give in and be seen a wuss or hold my ground since I am the man?”

I’d like to focus on a simple example, communicating with women — partner or friend.

Some men fail in this aspect in relationships. They often liken women to how men think. They, sometimes, expect women to see things and situations the way they do. They would neglect in altering their manner of addressing these women, which may cause significant damage to the relationship. Esp when the man is dating or in a relationship with that woman. Women friends have a higher tolerance for any failure to communicate properly. The former can easily be disappointed and, oftentimes, offended and hurt. Though, this is not saying that the woman is weak and easily dissuaded; the damage, irrepairable.

The manner in how a man communicates with his partner matters a great deal. Pitch, tone, and choice of words should be considered. Again, I’m not saying that this gives you license to lie or deceive. I’m merely pointing out that a man should be respectful and polite in communicating. His partner is not a slave that you can order around or malign. And even women friends aren’t like your mates whom you can dish out crude jokes or mercilessly jeer.

If we talk about couple arguments, it’s quite understandable that frustration and anger can also be felt by men, which can trigger offending manners in communicating. But we all know that we ought not to act on our anger, right? Cuz, more often than not, we end up doing something foolish, which we’ll soon regret.

My personal advise to men: “sweet talk” them women. Be the better man all the time. Use a more mellower tone. Be the rational voice in arguments. Soothe her worries with comforting and securing words (again, this is not an excuse to lie and deceive). Be polite. Be a gentleman. Let the women be the emotional creatures that they are and accept that. Treat them as you would treat your own mother or sister.

This doesn’t mean you’re a lesser man after it’s all over. It doesn’t signify that you’ve lost your masculinity. And it doesn’t mean you’re a wimp that women can easily manipulate. If you truly understand what I’m trying to say about this topic, then you’ll know that I’m simply trying to let you know that this “advise” is meant to better your communication skills.

Did I make sense?

Post from: Blisstree

Sweet Talk, It Helps