IMG: The Life of a Home Mom

Kanye grabbed the microphone and shouted Beyonce was the best, then handed the mic back to Taylor and left. The recent incident with Kanye West has me thinking of how important it is to teach our children manners. Here are some tips for etiquette.

- Teach your child manners at a young age. I began teaching mine to say please with hand gestures just to get them use to the idea of saying please for items. We also taught thank you at a very young age as well.

- Teach by example. If you are trying to teach your child how to be in public or to have good manners then the best way is by doing it yourself. Children mimic what they see, especially when it is their parents. If you show bad manners they will too.

- Southern Hospitality. Some believe it is just a southern thing, but I believe every child should learn the phrases: please, thank you, May I, Yes and No Sir/Ma’am. This shows respect and great manners. Another nice gesture or gentleman thing is to teach your boys to open doors for women.

- Show Respect to Elderly. We were always taught to say Mr. and Mrs/Ms. when addressing someone older than us. It shows respect and sounds much better than hey you.

- Show Right and Wrong Behavior. By showing your child what good manners are does not help if they only see good. Point out a few bad manners every once in a while so you can discuss with them why something is bad and what that person could’ve done to show good manners. This morning I showed my two oldest children the video, immediatley they asked why he did that. At that point I asked why they’d say that and why was it wrong. Both responded that it was disrespectful and wrong. My daughter replied that hurt her feelings and he interrupted her. Hopefully by watching this video in future years they will remember this and never pull a stunt like this.

- Manner recommendation resources.  One book I highly recommend is “Emily Post’s The Guide to Good Manners for Kids” by Peggy Post & Cindy Post Senning. Or you could visit the Catholic Education and read the “Teach Manners” which has four really good tips.

Manners are very important, not just for children but adults as well. Have you ever noticed when someone has manners it makes you smile? Or maybe you just liked that person a bit more. Some Manner issues we might want to teach our children using last night’s performance could be:

Manners To Teach Our Children:

- Don’t interrupt others.
- Careful of what you say.
- Respect.
- Rudeness.
- Manners in public places.

Can you think of things you can teach your children using the above mentioned ideas?  You can also show your children Good Manners by watching the video of Beyonce. Beyonce won the best video of the year award, but instead of having her moment to shine, she asked that Taylor come back out and give her speech that was interrupted. This showed true manners and great etiquette.

Good Manners to Learn from this Video:
- Gracious Behavior (both Beyonce and Taylor)
- Not Speaking bad of others. After the show Taylor was asked how she felt, she stated she had no ill-will towards Kanye. It takes a lot of guts to walk away and this girl did it with style.
- Sharing.
- Don’t Make a Scene. Taylor could’ve cried on stage and made a big scene, instead she quietly walked off the stage. How would your child have handled the situation?

In case you didn’t know, this is actually National Good Manners Month.  Could you think of a few other manners that we need to start teaching our children? Has something bugged you in public that you wished the child/parent had manners? What were they?

Post from: Blisstree

Kanye West Shows Bad Manners

Scarlet asked around and heard that he was “a pretty boy,” “too old,” and had “man boobs,” so when her mom hurt her wrist, she was presented with the perfect excuse to cancel the date. “Canceling” meant she just didn’t call him back.

He called her the next day with a “Thanks a lot, you missed a wonderful time at the lake,” which was funny because he never invited her to the lake in the first place. He must have been confusing her with a different date.

She swore off online dating again, as in “Michelle I am so done with that,” and then some guy from her list of Facebook friends asked her out. What is this woman’s secret?  Every time she turns around, she gets asked out. And I mean that literally, as one of the men who asked her out did so after driving by her in a parking lot – she was chatting with coworkers and he liked her ass.

Here’s what she has to say about the cancelation, “I did not want to be a hook up. Man boobs aside, a man should make a date-date, not a ‘call me and we’ll hook up,’ offer. If a man wants to date you, he puts more effort into it than that. ”

That makes a lot of sense to me. Good manners go a long way toward making the right impression.

Image credit: Michelle Smith

Post from: Blisstree

Manners and Pretty Boys

Etiquette is not something that should rule your life…Remember Countess Luann De Lesseps from Real Housewives of New York?  Now she took it too far.  But I do believe that there is a place for etiquette in relationships and you just need to find where that is.

Again, I strongly believe that etiquette lends its support when you find yourself in awkward situations.  Here are Dr. Phil’s Seven Keys to Dating Etiquette:

1.  Dress the part. Don’t dress too sexy.

2.  Be on time or your date might wonder, “What was more important than getting here on time?”

3.  Mind your table manners — and if you don’t have any, get some!

4.  Focus 100 percent on your date. Turn off your cell phone and other messaging devices.

5.  Check your emotional baggage at the door. Don’t go burdening your date with all of your problems.

6.  Sweat the small stuff. Listen to what your prospective mate has to say.

7.  Follow up. Do something that let’s your date know, “Hey, that was a lot of fun.”

Post from: Blisstree

Dating Etiquette Tips from Dr. Phil

I appreciate a Southern gentleman, but I will never wear this dress

Rick reminded me how I threw a fit last weekend when I got home from Publix. It was pouring rain and I had to drive my car to the front of the store to load the millions of bags of groceries into the trunk. Apparently all the baggers were tied up with other customers (and I tip well, even though Publix insists we shouldn’t tip) because none were in sight. So I loaded the car in the rain (the awning was three feet shy of my car so loading was a drenching experience) while a handful of people stood by and watched. Had one actually offered to help I would have insisted I could do it on my own. But still, it would have been nice to be asked.

Had Rick been standing there and seen a woman pathetically loading her car in the rain, he would have offered to help. He was just raised that way. He still opens my car door and always asks if he can get me a drink when he goes to get his own. And he always does the heavy lifting for me. He learned these things from his father, a true Southern gentleman.

Did you ever see that episode of Andy Griffith – I think it was that show – where Andy is talking to Opie … or maybe it was Thelma Lou (or was that Barney’s girl?) and he told whoever he was talking to that a true gentleman carries two handkerchiefs – one for himself and one to give to the lady? When I first started dating Rick we visited his family and I think I sneezed or something because his father handed me a handkerchief. I must have looked at him strangely because he said that was his extra one. He always carried two handkerchiefs. I thought it was the most chivalrous thing a man had ever done for me.

Rick reminds me I am more of a Southern belle than I give myself credit for. I was the one, after all, who insisted he talk to my father before he proposed to me. He thought it was an outdated notion, but it was important to me. So after putting it off as long as humanly possible, he finally took my father aside and asked for my hand in marriage. I’m not sure who was more uncomfortable – Rick or my dad. My mother and I, however, giggled like school girls when we found out the meeting actually happened.

Call it Southern hospitality or common courtesy, I do hope my son learns how much women truly appreciate a gentleman. First, though, I probably should teach him how to stop talking with his mouth full and calling other people “poopy head!”

Photo, Flickr, Jim Moore

Post from: Blisstree

Southern Hospitality or Common Courtesy?

Though I tried, this was never me.

When Truman says, “yeah,” when asked a question, I know it makes my in-laws cringe – and probably every other Southerner of their generation. I don’t want my son to grow up with that pressure of feeling like the “bad kid.” Like I did, somewhat. I remember one girlfriend in junior high school telling me when I spent the night at her house that I had to say “yes sir, no ma’am” to her parents or else experience her father’s wrath. I tried very hard…and then I never visited her house again. I’m not sure if I avoided invitations or simply was no longer invited.

At some point I learned that no matter how fussy I was or how much I loved the color pink, I would never be a true Southern belle. It’s taken decades for me to appreciate my land-of-fruit-and-nuts upbringing and that my parents were trying to teach me that I didn’t have to conform. (Though telling a 6-year-old that she didn’t have to pray when the rest of her public school class did sort of threw me for a loop.)

Still, Rick says we’d better start teaching Truman good Southern boy manners now, since he starts school in the fall. I told him I didn’t think it made much of a difference. My teachers never berated me for not saying it. Rick shrugged. It’s just good manners, at least here, where we are raising our son. And don’t I want my son to be like every other kid?

I don’t know. Do I?

Photo, Flickr, Jim Moore

Post from: Blisstree

Should I Raise a Southern Gentleman?

Finally! After much consternation and carping on my part about the lack of proper e-mail etiquette these days, comes music to my ears.

In the words of manners expert Letitia Baldridge in this week’s The New York Times Sunday Styles Section:

“…we need to have grace in our lives, and I’m not talking about heavenly grace. I’m talking about human grace…”

Ms. Baldridge is referring to how we compose, and more specifically how we sign-off on our e-mails.

Your salutation should be warm, friendly, appropriate to the situation or environment you are in…and above all it should be polite and friendly.

This article was helpful for me…I am sometimes guilty of ending my notes with the cold and rushed-sounding “Best, Kim.”

From now on, no matter how busy I am, recipients will receive a “Warm regards, Kim”. Unless I’m mad at you…:).

And if you’d like a more expansive understanding of online etiquette, visit NetManners.com.

Post from: Blisstree

Manners and Protocol For Modern Day Correpondence.