Hey all. Just one last post to say good-bye to all of our readers who’ve read, commented, and linked to Marriage Actually over the last year. Bald Man and I have had a great time writing here and getting to know you a bit, but life is taking us in different directions right now….too many directions! And while we’ve really enjoyed Marriage Actually, our time has to be put elsewhere. I think Marriage Actually is being left in very capable and talented hands, and we’ll continue to visit here often.

If you want to keep up with us, you can find Bald Man at www.baldmanblogging.com and me at www.mynameismommy.com.

So long, friends….

Kerri and Cory

I think I’ve mentioned before that Bald Man and I are a pretty good balance. One is a little more organized. I’m a little (read as—a lot) less so. One likes a schedule and expectations. I’m more willing to fly by the seat of my pants. One is bald. I’m not.

Sometimes I wonder, though, if we’re a little too balanced. Or, more accurately, if we’re not missing some features that would benefit us as a couple. Most often, I wonder how different our life would be if just one of us was a risk taker.

Our life, up to this point, has been pretty predictable. High school sweethearts, graduated from college, got married, bought a house, had kids. Still live and work within 15 minutes of where we lived when we met. Nothing bad, good actually, just nothing all that exciting.

We’ve had fantastic ideas, and sorta plans, to move across the ocean, adopt a child, travel, and so much more. And none of it has happened. It seems that, if it didn’t just come naturally and easily, neither of us has whatever it takes to really make it happen.

This is not at all to say that I’m not so very thankful for my life and marriage. I am. I just wonder who we would be at this point in our life if one of us was a bit more of a “breaking the mold” kind of person.

What personality attributes do you think might be missing from your marriage?

Okay, so I’m a bit behind in welcoming Marye and Marc to Marriage Actually. Marye’s one of my favorite b5 bloggers to read, so it’s exciting to have her and her husband joining us here. I’m enjoying their posts already, and look forward to learning from them and their experiences. No doubt Cory and I still have tons to learn about marriage!

So, welcome.

Head on over to Brew Ha-Ha to see what the b5 bloggers are cooking up for one of summer’s most important activities–Barbequeing!!!

Not that we don’t have our own barbeques here in the Midwest, but going to an authentic Barbeque restaurant is one of the things I miss most about going to Georgia. Not that I’m sad that Bald Man’s parents moved back here, but that was one of the perks to visiting them down South.

There are so very many ways that I need Bald Man, and not just the fun ones. I need him to reach back in the very top of the kitchen cupboard (and I’m not short, so that is really a need). I need him to take out the bathroom trash (cuz it’s nasty with diapers). I need him to love my family and remind me that I love them (even though they sometimes drive me batty). I need to remind him that we’re always on the same team. He’s good at that.

Like many wives, what I don’t need (ha…I wrote kneed the first time) is my hubby trying to fix my problems for me. Bald Man learned that one at a relatively early stage. It’s not that I don’t ever want his input, it’s just that there are certain things that I have to work out for myself, and he knows that, too. I know it’s hard for him to hold back, and he doesn’t always succeed, but he tries. I know. I can see the vein bulging in his forehead as he tries desperately to keep his mouth shut. (Thanks, babe, for the effort!)

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Barbecuing really is the one typical cooking domain of the husband, isn’t it? Well, that and pancake breakfasts. At least those are the only two meals that I am generally responsible for when they come up on the menu. Last weekend we had family and friends over for the holiday and I managed to turn the steaks inside out. That’s right: well done on the inside and pink on the outside. Not sure how I did it, so I’m sticking with calling them sea cucumber fillets.

No need to feel sorry for Kerri, though. First, she enjoys cooking and experimenting in the kitchen. Two weeks ago it was crepes; this past week was a new bread recipe; and I’m sure there will be something else this coming week. Second, I have regularly expressed my willingness to make dinner. That offer isn’t often utilized, but it should be noted that I hae a standing offer… subject to a bit of guidance getting started. (I usually don’t know what is in the pantry, and I prefer to have some advance warning because I like to plan.) Third, when she cooks, I frequently follow behind cleaning as she goes. We make a good team like that.

What about your house? How do you divide the cooking responsibilities? Are you as traditional as us, or are you more modern and progressive?

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Here’s a question for you: Let’s say you’re friends with another married couple. The four of you get along pretty well until one day you don’t. Or rather, they stop getting along with each other, and eventually they get divorced. What do you do? Double dates are, um, out of the question. Do you go with the third wheel approach? Does someone wind up getting cut out of the picture altogether? Kerri and I haven’t had to deal with this, but we have friends who have, so I thought it might make an interesting question.

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Here are 10 benefits I get from being married to Kerri, rapid fire style, in no particular order and by no means exhaustive

1. A full social calendar
2. Good food
3. Sex
4. Laughs
5. Encouragement when I’m down
6. A thousand touches that say “I love you”
7. More good food
8. Amazing kids
9. Someone to be impulsive with
10. Some one to grow old with

Okay, okay, I know it’s probably hard enough to find time just to talk with each other (though many of you seem to be doing well there!), when in the world can you find time to spend with another couple???

Fortunately for us, we have some suckers down the street that we conned into being friends with us. They’ve actually become very good friends that we count on to entertain us when we have some down time!!

Since they do live down the street, and our kids are similar ages, most of our date nights end up being cards or games while the kids fall asleep on the couch in front of a movie. (In a few years, the kids will be outlasting us in their own game nights!)

However, when we do get to actually go out with friends, we’re often at a loss as to what to do. Dinner and a movie is an easy one, but not one of my favorites. It bothers me to make time to go out and then sit for 2 hours in a movie theatre (20 minutes of which is commercials) not talking to each other. And most restaurants are so loud that it’s hard to have any conversation, anyway. Not to mention the fact that we’re all of the age that we’d rather watch movies in situations where we can pause for potty breaks, adjust the volume, and splay about the couches in the most comfortable/non-tailbone paining positions. (Seriously, we’re early 30s, and they’re late 20s. It all happens very early in life!!!!!)

Recently, we’ve gone bowling and to sporting events. Bowling allows for conversation, sports only somewhat. Can you tell I value conversation? After that, we’re pretty much at a loss. Maybe we could wander around our fair city in the summer months.

What about you? Do you have favorite couples night activities?

The holiday weekend gave Kerri and I a number of opportunities to play games with neighbors, and this question stems directly from a “disagreement” we had with another couple this weekend. Simply put: How do you sort playing cards? Assuming you order them, there are two likely possibilities. Looking at your hand and reading from left to right you either see:

A - K - Q - J - 10 - 9

or you see:

9 - 10 - J - Q - K - A

Vote below or in the sidebar. Be warned: there is a correct answer, one which Kerri and I agree on though we have promised not to reveal it until the poll is closed as a favor to our misguided friends.