Such a response is selfish. Your attitude is one of taking from your relationship. You are not willing to release the other person to do freely what he or she finds enjoyable. In effect, you are saying: “I want you to be happy, but only if you do what makes me happy. My happiness comes first, not yours.” That is a sign of infatuation, not love. Jealousy is strongly associated with divorce. More than three times as many divorced than happily married persons report mate jealousy.

Real Love: If it is love, jealousy is less frequent and less severe. Not that you will never feel jealous. None of us ever gets to be 100% selfless. But the more you love the other person, the more you are able to release her or him. Release is an expression of trust, respect, and acceptance. To the extent that your love is not selfish, you can be free of jealousy.

If she likes to talk to another boy once in a while, he will not restrain her freedom. He wants her to be happy, even though he might prefer that she talk only with him all the time. She will not mind if he on occasion likes to dance with some other girl. Love does not restrict, it release. It does not imprison, it liberates.

That’s why it’s so important that love be mutual. If you love, you trust. That means you need someone worthy of that trust. That way you can free each other to be your true selves, in full confidence that your trust will not be betrayed.

As your love grows, so does your trust and confidence. More and more you learn to avoid the things that displease each other. As a result, jealousy comes to be less frequent and less severe. At length it may all but disappear.

If you set out to save your life, that’s a selfish intent. The result is that you lose out on life. You miss the joy of giving, of being useful, of feeling needed.

Post from: Blisstree

CLUE 14. Are You Jealous?

Obsessive Habits
Eating, smoking, cleaning, sleeping, drinking – anything that is done in excess can be a sure sign there are underlying problems you may not be ready to take on.

Your Fish Has More Emotions
If your fish has more of an emotional connection to you than your partner, you might be barking up a tree that won’t produce any loving fruit any time soon, someone who keeps their emotions at such a distance is probably reserving them for an ex or a secret fantasy and you may just be the Mr. or Ms. Right now rather than Mr. or Ms. Right.

If a Wet Dishrag is Less Clingy
You may be with a person who has very deep security issues and could end up being possessive at best and even threatening. You’re better to cut the cord early than to attempt to play the cling free snuggle bear with this one.

Learn from History
If your partner isn’t willing to share their emotional and relationship history with you, there’s likely something hiding in them thar hills that you may not want to find. It’s ok to dig just a bit, but if your partner is reluctant, be prepared – you may not like what you hear.

When It’s Just Sex
If you and your partner are having unemotional – no strings attached sex, you should probably explore this relationship to see if you are both at the same place romantically before the relationship goes any further and creates more emotional baggage than it has to.

Can you think of any other tell-tale signs that a person is carrying excessive emotional baggage? Feel free to share them with us right here on Dating Dames!

Post from: Blisstree

Sure Signs of Emotional Baggage