The reason why I write this post is because earlier I witnessed an all-out brawl — fist fight and all — between two guys, er, two against one, if I’m not mistaken. No kidding. I just stepped off the tricycle (a local mode of transportation within villages or barangays) and was in the middle of crossing the street when I heard a woman’s voice screaming and crying, which caught my attention. I saw a group of brawling guys to the point that I actually saw a few punches thrown. I immediately decided to go back to where I came from and hid behind a couple of clustered concrete lamp posts to put distance between the fight scene and I and to protect myself from possible objects thrown my way or, worse, bullets. Egad.

Two men got off a car parked near the scene to break off the fight and that’s the only time I thought it safe to cross the street and go to the bar I was meeting friends at. Twas a crazy and scary experience, I tell ‘ya.

After having seated myself and sipping a cold bottle of beer did I begin to analyse the situation and came to speculate that it may have been cause by a love triangle problem. The two men chose to settle scores using brawns instead of brains. (Sorry if I sound so judgmental. Hehe) But, yea, it was a look at your modern day duel. A lot less romantic, believe me.

Duels have now evolved to street fights that happen in full view of the public AND the person you’re fighting over. How sad. How pathetic. And how scary.

It caused me to further think that this sort of thing is actually pretty foolish. I understand that perhaps you’re merely reacting to your partner cheating on you or retaliating on the other that he or she left you for but neither excuses the Neanderthal-ish act. It’s nothing but bruised ego me thinks. Had it been true love you would have reacted in a more dignified manner. Well, at least, that’s what I’d like to believe.

This then makes me wonder if the “love” you thought you had with that person is real love in the first place. Or was it infatuation?

It’s quite funny how dating in this modern age has become. Some tread it carefully and prudently while some carry on with their dating behaviours so loosely that things with serious repercussions, such as the brawl I’ve witnessed earlier, are taken ever so lightly.

What are your thoughts on this topic? Is it something you approve of? Have you witness a similar thing happen? Have you ever found yourself caught in a similar situation? I’m so curious as to how people react to this sort of thing. It’s quite a novelty on my part, actually. That’s why I’m curious about what people have got to say about the matter.

Post from: Blisstree

Fight for Love

Courtship has been practiced in different countries, in various ways, for hundreds of years now. And one of the most romantic acts in my book is the old fashioned love letter on parchment.

People nowadays rely on getting hook ups in bars, clubs or wherever. The whole concept of “pursuit” has slowly becoming extinct. They call it “the chase” now and the goal isn’t really a commitment or a serious relationship but, er, something else. Faint are the traditions or practices, which usually accompanies courtship and that includes, writing love letters on parchment back and forth.

I loved the feeling when I first received a love letter back in highschool. What made it extra special was the fact that the sender was a guy I was crushing on at that time. It was sent under an unusual circumstance, which I really don’t want to get into but to cut it short, it didn’t end good. Ah, well — kids. LOL.

What really brought this on, though, is the memory of the last time I got a letter from a guy [I'm not entirely certain if it really was a love letter].

Holding the paper and seeing the inked hand-writing, caused a lump in my throat. Yea. It has to do something about feelings and stuff. Heh. But I had to approach it with a lighthearted demeanor simply because, like how it is traditionally, women aren’t suppose to make their affections known until the man has proven himself. Call me old fashion. Teehee.

Bottomline, though technology presents a lot of avenues for communication, like mobile calls or sms messaging or instant messaging, nothing beats love letters on parchment. It’s a lot more personal. You can be sure that the guy put in a considerable effort in producing such a letter — picture the scene in the movie, Kate & Leopold, wherein Hugh Jackman’s character wrote a letter of apology to Meg Ryan’s character. He used a quill! Wasn’t it romantic?

I’m simply refusing to accept that we’ve reached the end of the age for love letters. The idea makes me sad.

Your turn. How do you feel about sending and receiving love letters? Or do you just prefer hitting the send/receive button of your Outlook? Or perhaps you prefer brevity or mobility — and are more inclined towards instant or SMS messaging, respectively?

Post from: Blisstree

Where have all the love letters gone?

Defining the basic make up of the so-called mentality, the couple basically act like how teenagers are like when they enter a relationship. Seemingly new to the whole concept, so, everything is still sweet and romantic. They also have a tendency to close themselves off from the rest of the society and, of course, there’s a lot of drama involved within the relationship.

Age is not a sole contributing factor, which explains why it’s called that way. It’s a common misconception. It’s the actual orientation that these two people had prior to entering the relationship. Either they had a idealistic definition or romanticised notion of what it really is to be part of a couple, basing it from books, movies or examples that they’ve taken in only by face value.

And yea, individuals who are in their 20s and even some who are in their 30s, can actually enter into a relationship bringing this kind of mentality with them.

High Points:

• Everything’s fresh and sweet.
• Passion is evident.
• It’s filled with romance.
• You’ll learn from it.

Low Points:

• Intimacy is poorly developed.
• Communication is not optimised.
• Fights are petty and tiresome.
• Growth as a couple is slim to none.
• Lacks the kind of commitment that a mature relationship has.

Personally, I have to admit that this mentality opened up opportunities to experience the fun side of the relationship but it also caused a lot of hurt in the process. I reckon it comes with the territory and most relationships go through that. However, knowing what you’re going into is better than foolishly and blindly taking the leap “just because”. Call me pragmatic and a cynic. Heh.

What about you? What are your thoughts on the matter? Is this something you experienced first hand, too?

Post from: Blisstree

The Teeny-bopper Mentality of Couples

It’s quite tragic really. You go through life believing that you are this lady that quietly lives her life and ‘prince charming’ will come gallantly one day to sweep you off your feet and rescue you from the gray-ness of life. You think that when he enters your life, you’ll be seeing a much colourful life. The sun will shine brighter and the air will taste sweeter. And you’ll think everything’s… cute.

And then you grow up.

You’ll finally see life for what it really is. All you can tell yourself is live it the best you can and deal.

It’s either you sink — or swim. It’s entirely up to you. You now know that no one will come to ‘rescue’ you.

I say blame it on the romanticism presented in films and books. Writers portray love as some magical thing that can end your misery and make you believe that it will complete you. Perhaps it will and perhaps it won’t. But it always comes at a price.

Here’s what I think, your life is orchestrated to take away as much as it can from you. You’ll be forced to think about what you now don’t have, hence, you begin to long for such things. You’ll spend the rest of your life searching for it since you believe that you’re incomplete.

You can get lucky and find someone to complete you. Or if things don’t go your way, you’d end up settling for a filler. And it doesn’t end there. You now have to ‘relate’ — that’s a whole lot complicated than being on your own.

Why do love and relationship play an important role in our life? Is it a real need? In order to survive, all we need is food, water and shelter. Why do we concern ourselves with things apart from these 3 things anyway? Why are we built to ‘need’ companionship? I’m still trying to figure it out.

I just think that people should stop sugar-coating this area in life. People should start thinking that, sometimes, there’s nothing poetic about it at all. There’s no sonnet or song that can best define what a person goes through in search of it. It doesn’t compare to the world’s real problems like war, poverty and hunger. Present the facts. Stop using metaphors and hyperboles.

Just tell the friggin’ story.

People should see it as it is — a good story or a bad story. But it’s still just a story with an ending — happily ever after or not.

[No, I'm not having a bad day. Hahaha.]

Original Post at Truth + Travesty.

Post from: Blisstree

Theory: Most women believe in faerie tale endings

I’ve heard women classified as desperate by people when they’ve reached the threshold of eligibility, ergo, making them spinsters if not, candidates, at least.

Tell me, is there a definitive deadline for someone to choose a mate before labeling her a spinster?

Once a woman sees this possibility, it scares her. It then creates a domino effect of bad choices, one jerk after the other. Making her believe in the lie that she has to grab what’s there for the taking. It’s sad, really.

What makes a woman lose her right to choose her mate in the first place? Is it if she doesn’t fit the mold as to what the society dictates to be beautiful? Is it if she doesn’t run in the same social circle as the guy’s? Or is it because she’s simply was branded less of a human being since she never finished a degree or only speaks one language?

Questions that need answering. I’m hoping to find positive and real ones since I’m one of the people who advocates that anyone can afford to be romantic and ask for the ideal. I believe that one should never settle on something or someone less than he or she deserves.

Post from: Blisstree

Can you afford to be romantic?