We did have a plan to move in together at one point, but circumstances, meaning job stuff, changed those plans.   Since that time, we have not spoken about it again.  Our visits have been timed farther apart, but that’s due to gas prices more than anything else.  Even though our time together felt normal and okay when he was in town, part of me was worried.  Why didn’t he bring it up again?  How come he was able to go for long periods without talking to me? 

A couple of things changed  my outlook in less than a week. One was reading the column that featured the Involved/Committed chart and I figured out that I was involved and he was the one who was truly committed. The other was the realization that I am a bit overwhelmed by my life right now and this, these short visits every 6 weeks or so, they are all I am up to right now.  All of a sudden, I felt more relaxed and ready to enjoy our time together. 

I used to do this thing when I was a kid – I’d read the end of the book way ahead of time.  I had to know how things were going to end and once I knew, I could relax and enjoy the story.  Right now, I don’t know how things are going to end, but I’m okay with that.  Just knowing that I love someone who has faith in us, that’s enough for me, because he’s a smart guy and I trust that he knows what he’s talking about. 

Sometimes love is like that, you close your eyes, you grab the hand of your loved one, and together you jump.   If you get to that jumping off point at the same time, great, but if you don’t, try to be patient, everyone has their own timetable and there’s no forcing true and honest commitment. 

Post from: Blisstree

Ready To Jump

After my divorce, I had one serious relationship, dated very little, then stopped. I went back to school and I had small children at home – I wanted my focus to be on my kids. I’m not saying everyone should do this, I’m saying it was my experience. Unfortunately, I waited a bit too long to get back into dating. I felt as if I forgot how to do it.

I was a work at home mom, so meeting men wasn’t a part of my day. I turned to internet dating. I tried Match.com and Plentyoffish.com. Some nice guys emailed me, some odd guys emailed me. I had a few coffee dates. I felt no sparks with any of them.

Last year, I started catching up with old friends through Classmates.com. One of these old friends was S. It was fun getting to know him again. We kept things on friends-only basis for a time. His dad lives about 20 minutes away from me, so last Summer we decided to try a visit. It went very well and we fell quickly.

I’d like to say that it’s been smooth sailing since then, but that’s not very realistic. I love my boyfriend, but long distance relationships are tough. I need more reassurance than he does, it’s really aggravating, but it’s the truth. It’s easy to misunderstand each other when we aren’t talking face to face and he’s better at seeing the long term, the big picture than I am. I wake up every morning wishing we could start the day together. Someday.

I look forward to getting into this new venture, to exploring relationships and dating with all of you readers. If you have anything in particular that you would like me to talk about, please let me know.

Post from: Blisstree

Hello, it’s me, Michelle.