The first sex mistake men are making is holding their partner’s hand. If you want her to be “more willing to really give herself to you in the bedroom,” than take it a step farther, step up your PDA, they say. You know what really works for me?  Pick up after yourself. Help me with my chores. Carry in the groceries and I will be all over you.

The second mistake you are making, men, is that you are in too much of a hurry to get to the deed. Okay, I have nothing to make fun of here. Taking your time is always a good idea. Although a quickie does have it’s place, too. Like while the coffee is brewing.

The third mistake – you are stuck in a rut. Switch up your local a bit. They suggest, “…the backseat of the car. It feels a little public, it’s steeped in testosterone, and there’s a throwback, high-school quality to it.” Just be careful where you try this. Getting arrested is never sexy.

The fourth mistake has to do with “predictable foreplay.” They suggest working up a sweat together. I once fell for someone on a hike, so I can back this idea up. The picture that they have with this one is funny – an irked looking woman staring at the back of her sleeping partner’s head. Hey buddy, how dare you sleep when your woman is in the mood. Maybe she wore him out earlier?

I don’t get this fifth one. It says, “lopsided first moves,” and then it mentions tying her hands.  Isn’t tying someone up an actual “lopsided” move?  Are you making a mistake if you are not practicing bondage?  If that’s the case, then every man I have ever been with is guilty of this one. I know that there are many people who are into this.  Not me.  I have no problem with other people enjoying it, but after years of being the only adult in the home, I’m a bit of a control freak. Tying me up would only stress me out, not make me horny. Freedom is much sexier to me.  (Yes, I am aware that I have issues.)

The last mistake is watching television. Seriously?  If your man watches television he’s somehow making a sexual mistake?  “You watched the game! Don’t you ever touch me again!” That’s just goofy. To fix this problem, they suggest reading to your partner. I like to read to myself. How about a back rub instead?  I could always use one of those.

Guys, it’s really very simple. You don’t need this list. Be generous, be considerate, and take your time whenever possible. It’s not rocket science. It’s sex.  As long as you are having fun, you are doing it right. 

Image credit: Sxc.hu

Post from: Blisstree

Men and Sexual Mistakes

In the book, she mentions the importance of afterplay.  “Afterplay” is that time after orgasm, sometimes known as “after-glow.”  If handled correctly, afterplay actually works as a part of foreplay for the next encounter.

It’s particularly important for both men and women to realize that the curve of sexual arousal after orgasm is a much slower one for women than for men. That’s why it’s so important for women to teach their partners that they need to be caressed, held and talked to after they have orgasm. This kind of afterplay is so important that it will actually be the foreplay for the next sexual encounter. When men say it’s physiological that they have to go to sleep right after sexual intercourse, that’s nonsense. That’s just being sexually illiterate. They have to be taught that important aspect of the sexual encounter.

For some reason, the whole idea of cuddling afterward has turned into some kind of joke, which is unfortunate since it turns out that is actually essential to an ongoing successful sexual relationship.

Image credit: Amazon.com

Post from: Blisstree

Afterplay – As Important As Foreplay

 

Sex is an important part of being human. Not only does it feel good and reinforce a strong relationship, but it also has health benefits well beyond other forms of exercise.  AOL Health reports that it can actually slow the aging process. During an appearance on the Oprah show, Dr. Mehmet Oz asked a series of questions to help determine an individual’s health IQ. He asked…………

*How often should you have sex? The multiple choice options: once a week, twice a week, 10 times a month, 200 times a year.

*The answer: 200 times a year.

“If you have more than 200 orgasms a year, you can reduce your physiologic age by six years,” Dr. Oz says, basing this number on a study from researchers at Duke University who surveyed people about the amount and quality of sex they had. “They looked at what happened to folks that are having a lot of intercourse over time, and the fact is, it correlated.” Frequent sex helps prove that your body is functioning as it is supposed to. “But in addition, having sex with someone that you care for deeply is one of the ways we achieve that Zen experience that we all crave as human beings,” says Dr. Oz. “It’s really a spiritual event for folks when they’re with someone they love and they can consummate it with sexual activity…seems to offer some survival benefit.”

Sex as an anti-ager? Sounds way more enjoyable than getting a chemical peel.   

Image credit – Michelle Smith

Post from: Blisstree

Sexual Zen Slows the Aging Process

Ok, how many of you cringed at that headline? I did! OH the thought of my grandma getting down and dirty is difficult enough to stomach, but to think she was a blazing hussy having sex before marriage – GASP at the thought!

Seriously though, I think we’ve all been there – and if you haven’t then please place your feet upon the Dating Dames pedestal and allow me to kiss your feet because you truly are one in a billion if not more.

Now that I’m somewhere between my grandma and mother’s generation and looking at my own children who are within a few years of dating age themselves, I find myself reflecting on just how times have really changed.

What are your thoughts on premarital sex? I know men and women view the topic so differently – but if you could do that “going back thing” and change your premarital sexual encounters, would you?

To find out more on Grandma and her sexcapades find the full article and survey here.

Post from: Blisstree

Even Grandma had premarital sex