A fellow stay-at-home mom, part-time preschool teacher, said this, “Whenever I start feeling bad about not having as much money as everyone else or going without a nicer house I just think, “I live in the United States of America and we don’t even know the meaning of poverty and my children are white males in the United States of America with access to a good education, food, shelter and clothing.”"

I very often find myself thinking the same thing. If you’ve ever been to a third world country you understand just how blessed even the poor are in America. Certainly, me and my family are blessed with a full refrigerator, more clothes than the kids can wear, shoes, cars that are ugly but functional, a roof over our heads, access to education and employment. Even while striving for more, I try to keep a gratefulness in my heart about what we actually do have already.

In an attempt to show God and others our gratitude we donate a percentage of our income to some cause that presents itself. Sometimes its a person, sometimes its the church, other times its a cause. This morning I was doing a little surfing on the web and clicked on a pretty good cause.

Kiva is a micro-finance website that allows people in the United States and Europe to directly contribute to people in developing countries that have an idea for a small business but no money to start it. The San Francisco-based company does all the research into their ability to pay back the loan, as well as the viability of their business venture before allowing them onto the site as prospective borrowers. Then users, like you or me, go onto the site and browse what kind of investment we would like to make.

According to Rob Krieger’s report for Frontline World on PBS even I (and you) can participate in micro-finance lending to poverty-stricken people in third world countries to supply capitol for them to start a business. The 2006 Nobel Prize was awarded to Dr. Muhammad Yunus for his ideas about how a measly portion of our income, even $25, could buy the supplies needed to start a small business in some of these countries. Reportedly, nearly 100% of the loans are paid back on time.

Margaret Mead is the author of one of my favorite quotes,

Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world; indeed, it’s the only thing that ever has.

I think I’ll search Kiva and find a business that speaks to my heart and put this week’s $25 donation into it. Really, it can’t make the world a worse place can it?

Post from: Blisstree

Abundance

I’m using the word Xerox as a metaphor for, supposedly, “menial” tasks…or more to the point, our own sense of self-importance.

For me, as a small business owner, the xeroxing and the envelope stuffing, and the running to the post office are never over.

I have to do these things myself…and goddd, I think I’ve been collating documents for 30 years.

But when I was in corporate-land, I had “people” who did these tasks.

We learn when we start life at a big corporation that assistants do certain things, and managers…well..don’t.

I was speaking to a colleague, a very Sr. manager at a large company here in NYC.

She complained that another Sr. person in her department made a comment to my friend that goes something like: “…done Xeroxing yet?”

To which my friend responded, “…want to help me..?” And of course, the answer resulted in an expletive.

Here’s my feeling about this…NO ONE is beyond these tasks.

It’s true that as a person moves up the corporation — the busier or more Sr. one becomes — as in, more valuable to a company — there is a direct correlation to how time is managed.

But as a human, we should never feel or behave as if we’re more important than anyone else at the company.

And by the way, it starts at the top — if you want your department or your company to behave with sensitivity…it won’t kill you to stand and chat at the copy machine, as you send your Power Point presentation through the machine.

Now, who wants to run to Staples for me?:-).

Post from: Blisstree

When Is The Xeroxing Over?

I think it’s vital for a business to include philanthropic efforts in its marketing plans, which has had me thinking about what The Pet Set might be able to develop.

Yes, we support great organizations such as The National Disaster Search Dog Foundation and Puppies Behind Bars , but I would like us to do more, and I would like to build a program that is exclusively Pet Set.

As I was looking around my dog’s canine pantry, it dawned on me that he has more food than we do. So do many American domestic dogs. We spend thousands of dollars as a country feeding our dogs.

Then, the lightbulb moment! What if we could initiate a project that was dedicated to dogs feeding hungry children.

I know, pretty neat, huh?

Oh…one snag. How are we ever be able to convince people that we weren’t giving dog food to children?

This is what I mean when I express here that one of the down sides to owning your own business is that you have no one with whom to share your ideas…and no one who can tell you how lame your ideas are sometimes.

Anyway, until I can come up with an intelligent and logical campaign…The Pet Set will continue to donate to deserving and respected animal causes.

Post from: Blisstree

How Dogs Can Give Back To The Community.

This New Year’s Day will be the 2nd anniversary of the launch of my stationery business, The Pet Set.

A person with a healthy sense of self-esteem might look at that personal milestone as an exhilarating acheivement.

How do I view this upcoming date? With utter panic and fear.

Why?

Why would a person who left Corporate America to tackle what many Americans hope for — to become small-business owners — feel anything less than euphoric by what has been accomplished, in a little more than 2 years?

Why does every Pet Set sale give me only a momentary blush of pride — followed by almost instantaneous alarm?

Why are the awards and recognition not evidence that I might actually know what I’m doing?

Because I live every moment, of every waking day of my life consumed with feelings of inadequacy and incompetence.

I’ve been to therapy, I’ve seen respected psychologists, I’ve read books, I’ve surfed the web (btw — a maddening exercise to do on your own).

I understand how irrational my state of being is…I understand that it affects those around me, it affects my work and possibly my overall health.

Recently in an e-mail from colleague of mine here at b5.media, wrote this simple phrase: You must be so proud — referring to The Pet Set.

I must have stared at her words for ten minutes, as if my brain simply could not understand her syllables.

Proud? Of what? What have I done? Why can’t I be better? When will I fail? When will the sales stop coming in?

Donald Trump always says, In business, you must never give up…and a lot of other lame, one-dimensional blather as well.

But sometimes, when I’m feeling especially unimpressed with myself and frightened of the future…I think of his words and somehow they make sense. And he’s no psychologist!

I’m sure this angst-ridden existence, points to something to do with my childhood. Which is why the self-esteem improvement techniques I’ve studied over the years don’t help me.

I need to understand why the root cause of my self-created reality.

I wonder if someday, I’ll find the answers to all of this…in the mean time, a sale just came in as I was writing this.

Oh, yay. Nuts, huh?

Post from: Blisstree

Why Self Esteem Is Key To Running A Business.

This comes under the heading of, “It seemed like a good idea at the time”.

There are times when, in my new role of small business owner, “dog mom”, and house-wifey — I need a little help with some of the chores around here.

So, when my “danny”, (dog-walker-dog-nanny) asked if she could increase her hours…I thought what a great opportunity to combine the dog walking responsibilities with some light house duties.

I put together an official “danny” schedule and shared it with her. She seemed thrilled…and oddly inhabited with new-found sense of purpose.

Yay, I thought…I could get some work done, while having someone I knew and cared about, milling around the house, getting things done.

Here’s the thing, I thought that because she seemed willing to come over “whenever” to be with my dog, and he seemed to lover her…that it would make perfect sense to broaden her responsibilities.

But quickly, I began to notice strange behavior…calling in sick…forgetting which days she was supposed to come over…and here’s the worst part…on several occasions she seemed more than slightly tipsy.

I also noticed that the dog seemed unnerved around her.

In my neck of the woods, if a person leaves your home in an inebriated state…the homeowner is libel. Plus, in her condition, if my 70lb Lab decides to dash off in front of a squirrel…he could end up beneath a car! And then I’d be devastated.

As serious as all of that sounds, what bothers me the most is that I went out of my way to help her — because I felt sorry for her.

I tried to organize her life a little — I tried to control her…and unfortunately, I may have unwittingly enabled her habits…she used me, used my house and she even used the dog.

So…now what to do? I don’t want to let her go…she does after all help out enormously…but I think I must find a way to sit her down and be extremely clear about what is expected…and coming to the house drunk is out of the question.

I think, not only will I have to buck up and dismiss her, set aside my own “people-pleasing” issues and learn how not to fall victim to that kind of behavior again.

Sorry, Trotter.

Post from: Blisstree

What Happens When You Hire A Friend?

Yes, it’s true, we’ve covered meaty topics such as employee/employer relationships, adversity during a presentation, the benefits and drawbacks of owning a small business — but most of the time, I wish I were on a perpetual coffee break.

Today is one of those days…join me for a little break?

Looking for THE perfect chocolate cupcake? Once again, Ina Garten to the rescue.

Even the name of it is perfect: Chocolate Ganache Cupcakes. How sexy is that?!

• 1/4 pound unsalted butter, at room temperature
  1 cup sugar
  4 extra-large eggs, at room temperature
  1 (16-ounce) can chocolate syrup (recommended: Hershey’s)
  1 tablespoon pure vanilla extract
  1 cup all-purpose flourFor the ganache:
  1/2 cup heavy cream
  8 ounces good semisweet chocolate chips
  1 teaspoon instant coffee granules
  Candied violets, for decoration, optional
• Line muffin pans with 12 paper liners. Preheat the oven to 325 degrees F.
• Cream the butter and sugar in the bowl of an electric mixer fitted with the paddle attachment until light and fluffy. Add the eggs, 1 at a time. Mix in the chocolate syrup and vanilla. Add the flour and mix until just combined. Don’t overbeat, or the cupcakes will be tough.
• Scoop the batter into the muffin cups and bake for 30 minutes, or until just set in the middle. Don’t overbake! Let the cupcakes cool thoroughly in the pan.
• For the ganache, cook the heavy cream, chocolate chips, and instant coffee in the top of a double boiler over simmering water until smooth and warm, stirring occasionally.
• Dip the top of each cupcake in the ganache. Decorate with candied violets, if desired. Do not refrigerate.

Go. Bake. Bring to the office and be loved. And if you find the freaking candied violets, you are not allowed back here…(I jest.) (No, I don’t.)

Image: flickr.com

Post from: Blisstree

Serious Blogging or Chocolate?!

It’s their tagline: “Because Your Business Is Your Life.” Um…hmmm….nope. No, it is not; and I hate it when banks try to pose as if they know me or my life.

As the politicians say: make no mistake — The Pet Set is profoundly important to me.

It’s creation it and development have changed my life. I stay up very late at night and wake up very early — worring about every detail and decision — from the ordinary to the momentous. But it’s not my life. My life is my life.

During the years I worked in Corporate America, THAT was my life. Morning, noon and night and then some. There was nothing else — only the prospect of making more and more money and getting to the top.

And of course there was Manhattan, my other life, at the time.

Go ahead ask me what street any popular restaurant in New York is on and I can tell you…ask me where the best place to get a cab after a Broadway show? That’s a cinch…tip any hotel doorman in the area, and you will be in a cab.

But now, my life is a bit more balanced; it’s more civilized; and it’s probably more interesting…although THAT is hard to see when it’s me, my computer and my dog.

So Visa, maybe your tagline should be “Your business may keep you up all night, but your credit card shouldn’t.” Too long?

Post from: Blisstree

A Notice To Visa Marketing Department

The one thing I may not have touched upon is how family members enter into the mix…which I feel must be addressed–hopefully in a manner that won’t insult anyone.

Today is Sunday, and I have spent several hours working on creative and administrative details for The Pet Set. Because it is Sunday, certain people and his dog wander into my office and begin to have entire conversations with me–not actually recognizing (accepting?) that I am working.

It’s probably my own fault. I will pause momentarily to do some laundry or look up a recipe or even call the lawn guy. As a result, I’m probably sending out some kind of signal which indicates that I’m not fully concentrating on business. (My very casual summer attire adds to this misconception.)

I’m thinking that what I should do in the future is dress in full business garments, keep the office door closed and not emerge until my work is complete.

Now on to dinner plans.

Post from: Blisstree

How To Look Like You’re Working.

It has become such a disturbing feature in my dream repertoire that I’ve been getting up in the middle of the night to work!

Here goes:

The dream is set at my old college campus; and it is final exam day. I am staring at a blank exam booklet and I realize that I didn’t spend one minute studying. Suddenly time is up and my answers are either incomplete or rubbish. Then, I realize that I am going to fail, so I ask if I can take the exam again, and the answer is always no — so I start to cry (in the dream).

There is that version or the one where I do not have enough credits to graduate.

I have 2 degrees and finished (a loooong time ago) with good grades. I have heard that dreams of this nature could mean that I believe I don’t have adequate “life tools” that I am unprepared.

Interestingly, if you tie those thoughts to how my career has developed, I guess you could make some connections. While I am now running my own small business, my efforts at corporate life were often miserable, in that I was so terrible at understanding how to engineer office politics and managing up that my stints at some of the largest Fortune 500 companies didn’t last.

Do you see any correlations? In the mean time, as I write this post, a producer of a TV show wants to interview me for a segment about The Pet Set…so maybe I’m ok?

Please let me know your thoughts.

Post from: Blisstree

Can you interpret my dream?